Without You(47)

"I love you, too, Lex, more than you will ever know."



I knocked on Libby's dorm room door and slowly started opening it. I  walked into the room and saw my sister sitting on her bed. She had her  legs pulled up to her chest as she rocked back and forth. The moment her  eyes met mine, my heart broke, and I wanted to kick someone's ass.         

     


///
 

"Libby … Jesus, honey, what's wrong?" I quickly walked over and sat on the bed.

She threw herself into my arms. "I should have moved into the house with y'all. What did I do? Oh God. Oh God."

Her body was shaking, and she was crying so hard that I could hardly  understand her. I pulled back to look at her and used my finger to make  her look at me.

"Libby, you're scaring the hell out of me right now. Honey, please tell me what happened. Please, Libby."

She shook her head. "His face. I'll never forget the look on his face."

"Whose face? Did Zack do something to you?"

She shook her head. "No, I thought I was ready. I thought it would help me move on and forget … forget … "

I was so confused. "Libby, I need you to calm down. You're not making  any sense, and honestly, I'm ready to go find Zack and pound the shit  out of him."

She smiled slightly, and she started to take in a few deep breaths  before letting them out. I waited patiently as she calmed herself down  enough to talk.

"I thought I was ready to … to … " Her voice cracked. She closed her eyes  and slowly opened them. "I thought I was ready to sleep with Zack. I  mean, I like him. I really do. Well, we … "

I grabbed her hand and held it in mine. It was harder than hell to sit  here and listen to my sister talk about having sex with someone.

"We had sex. It wasn't great or life-changing, and it was not at all like how Lex talks about her first time with you."

She smiled slightly as I grinned back at her. My heart was already breaking for her.

"I thought I wanted it, Will. I thought this might be the final thing  that would connect Zack and me … and make me forget about-" A sob escaped  her mouth. "Make me forget about Luke." She began crying but quickly  regained her composure.

My heart was pounding so hard in my chest. I wasn't sure if I wanted to  beat the hell out of Zack for touching my sister or fight Luke for  pushing her away like this.

"When someone started knocking on the door, I quickly jumped up and put  on a robe. I wasn't even thinking that it could be Luke. He hasn't even  looked my way since … "

I tilted my head. "Since when?"

She swallowed hard. "Since spring break." She shook her head as if  trying to erase a bad memory. "I opened the door, and he was standing  there. He asked to talk to me, and I said it wasn't a good time, but  he … he just wouldn't take no for an answer. Then, he pushed his way in  and saw Zack in my bed. He turned and looked at me, and the look in his  eyes … " She dropped her head, and tears began falling. "He looked  devastated, broken. He didn't say a word. He just stared at me, and then  he left."

"Libby, shit. You and Luke need to sit down and talk." I wiped her tears away.

She nodded her head. "In that very moment, I knew I had made a mistake. I  knew Luke and I pushing each other away was the cause of all of this."

She looked into my eyes. Her eyes were so sad.

"But he's slept with other people, Will. He's been with Abigail this  whole year, and he comes in and makes me feel like I'm the bad person."

"Libby, sweetheart, Luke hasn't been with Abigail in months. I don't even remember the last time Luke went to a party."

Her mouth dropped open. Then, she turned her head and stared out the window. "But … Abigail told me … I thought … "

"Libby, listen, it's not your fault, okay? You can't feel guilty. You  and Zack are dating. Luke had plenty of chances to tell you how he felt  about you. If he wasn't so afraid of his feelings for you, y'all would  have talked it through and stopped playing this cat-and-mouse game."

She quickly looked back at me and shook her head. "No, it's my fault. This is all my fault."

I didn't know why she was saying that. "Libby, Luke has never given you  any real reason to think he has feelings for you. This is not your  fault."

She quickly wiped away her tears. "Where is he? I need to talk to him."

I pushed my hand through my hair and stood up. "He, um … he's gone."

She jumped up. "Gone? What do you mean, gone?"

"He came home, and he was really upset. He said he was heading home. He took his last final earlier today, and … well, he left."

Her hands came up to her mouth, and she began crying again.

I pulled her to me. "Shh … it's okay, Libby. Let's just get you all packed  up and out of here, and we'll be home in a few days. You and Luke can  talk then."         

     


///
 

She nodded her head. "Let me splash some cold water on my face, and we  can start taking some stuff to your truck. I'm all packed up, except for  a few things."

I watched my sister slowly make her way to her bathroom. I let out a sigh and sent Lex a text message.

Me: With Libby. Packing up her stuff. She's moving into the house. She's  a mess. She and Luke need to have their damn heads smashed together.

Lex: I know! This summer will be different. Things will get better. I can feel it in my bones!

Me: I hope you're right. Talk to ya later, baby.

Lex: Okay. I love you! Hey, don't forget that Grace and I are going to a  party here. It's the last party of the year, and we want to say  good-bye to a few friends.

Me: Right. Just be careful.

Lex: Always! I'll text you or call you later.



Libby smiled. "That's the last of it. My dorm is cleared out. I guess I get first pick of the other rooms!"

I laughed. "You and Lauren are bunking up, right?"

She nodded her head. "Yep. I can't wait. Grace is going to be pissed 'cause I'm picking the room with the balcony!"

I laughed and sat down on the sofa.

Libby fell into a chair and let out a sigh. She looked at me and said, "Thank you."

I smiled. "Libby, I'll always be here for you, no matter what. You're my  sister, my life. You and Lex will always be first and foremost in my  mind."

She went to say something when the front door opened. I looked over and saw Luke walking in.

He didn't even bother to look at us. "I fucking forgot my laptop and  everything else in my rush earlier. I made it all the way to Austin and  had to turn around, and-" He stopped talking when Libby stood up.

"Luke," she whispered.

He stopped walking and looked at her. "What are you doing here?"

She swallowed hard. "Will helped me move all my stuff in, and I … well, I want to talk to you."

For one brief second, it seemed like Luke was relieved.

Then, he frowned. "We don't have anything to talk about, Libby."

"I think we do, and if-"

Luke shook his head. "Listen, it was wrong of me to stop by there. It was a mistake. I know you're happy with Zack, and-"

Libby took a few steps toward Luke. "If you'll just let me-"

Luke held up his hand. "No, Libby. I'm happy for you that you found someone." He quickly made his way upstairs.

Libby stood there. I was just about to tell her to go after him when she bolted up the stairs.

I got up, made my way to the kitchen, and grabbed a root beer. Not two  minutes later, Luke was coming down the stairs. He looked at me, and the  sadness in his eyes surprised me. I figured Libby had gone up there to  talk to him, but here he was, leaving.

"Luke … dude, where are you going?"

He stopped and looked at me. "Home. I have no idea after that." He opened the front door and left.

I stood there, stunned. I wanted to run upstairs and ask Libby what had  happened, but my phone rang. I looked down to see Grace was calling me.

"Hello?" All I could hear was commotion. "Hello? Grace! Can you hear me?"

"Will!" she screamed.

I dropped the root beer and held on to the counter. Something happened. Lex is hurt. Oh God, please let her be okay.

"Grace … "

The front door flew open, and Luke looked at me.

"Get in my fucking truck now. Libby!" Luke yelled out.

Libby came running down the stairs. "I just got a text from Grace. Something about Lex being taken away in an ambulance?"

Luke grabbed her and said, "Go get in my truck. We're going to Austin."

I stood there, still on the phone with Grace. All I could hear was Grace's muffled voice.

"Grace! Tell me what the fuck is going on."

Grace was crying. "I found her, Will. I found her, but he was hitting  her. I screamed, and … oh God, Will. Blake was about to … he had Alex. Oh  God! He was trying to … when we walked into the room, he was hitting her  while she was trying to fight him off. I think he might have given her  something. Will … I'm so sorry I didn't keep an eye on her. We're on the  way to Brackenridge Hospital."