Weight of Silence(50)

Gavin had matted and framed his sketch of Carter’s Lake after signing the bottom corner in his loopy scrawl. As Jace studied the picture and tried to get his voice to work again, he noticed tiny details that Gavin must have added after he’d last seen it. Some branches were sharper, other parts of the water were smudged and shaded. Gavin had refined the drawing with his artist’s hand, and it was perfect.

“I love it,” Jace finally managed.

“Since you inspired it, I wanted to give it to you,” Gavin said. The words made Jace’s heart clench in a wonderful way. “Happy New Year, Jace.”

“Thank you. Happy New Year.”

Jace had been prepared to start their make-out session right then and there, only his parents hadn’t left for their own New Year’s party yet, so he settled for a simple thank-you kiss. As much as his parents said they understood and still loved him, he didn’t want to rub their faces in it. His sisters, on the other hand, were a different story. He had no qualms about kissing Gavin in front of them, but they were already out.

Rachel was at Molly’s party, which Jace was dreading like a cavity filling.





Molly and Rachel greeted him and Gavin at the front door. Molly even gave Gavin a hug, which surprised them both, before sending them off into the churning crowd of faces both familiar and strange. Music blared from the living room, and the dining room table was covered in bowls of chips, dips and two liters of soda. A keg sat on the floor near the china hutch, its nozzle passing hands frequently. Gavin flanked him as he wound his way through the downstairs, close without clinging. A little part of Jace wanted to grab his hand to make sure he stayed put.

“Ramsey!”

The bellowed greeting sent a bolt of adrenaline right through Jace’s chest. He turned and was swept into a bear hug by Charlie Hogan. Charlie had packed on more than the freshman fifteen his first year in college, and he’d added to that this past semester. With Jace’s own unexpected weight loss, the hug was like being tackled by a grizzly.

“Damn, man, you been sick or what?” Charlie asked as he pounded him on the back then released him. “You’re skinny as a pole.”

“Bad flu,” Jace said. He hated lying, but he didn’t need to tell everyone who asked that he’d been anxiety-ridden and depressed, and was only now coming out from under it. Mostly.

“Well, get some food. Molly’s got pizza coming at nine too.” He finally noticed Jace wasn’t alone. “Hey, man. Charlie Hogan.”

Gavin stepped forward and shook his hand. “Gavin Perez.”

“Charlie and I ran track together in high school,” Jace said.

“Would never have guessed that, huh?” Charlie asked with a grin. He didn’t seem bothered by his expanded body size. He actually seemed happier than he had running himself ragged for the track team. “You keeping out of trouble?”

“Doing my best. You?”

“Never.” He listened to Charlie rattle off a story of pledging his fraternity that gathered a small crowd and eventually had them all laughing. Charlie always could tell a good story, even if he liked to embellish details for effect. “Great thing about our frat is there’s a sorority who throws parties with them every other weekend. Plenty of pussy out there if you’ve got letters, you know?”

Jace resisted the urge to roll his eyes, even while some of the other guys in their small circle hooted and agreed. “Do they fall all over your svelte new figure?” he asked.

Charlie chuckled. “You know it. Put some meat back on your carcass and maybe you’ll stop showing up to every party stag, dude.”

His mouth went dry. This was the part where he was supposed to say he wasn’t here alone, he was with his boyfriend. Only the words stuck in his throat.

“I don’t know,” Gavin said conversationally. “I saw the ass Jace got the other day, and…” He made a whistling noise.

“Dude!” Charlie slapped Jace on the shoulder. “Seriously? You got a girlfriend? Good for you.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” Jace said. He simultaneously wanted to laugh at Gavin’s own opinion of himself and poke him for bringing it up at all.

“Even better. Get some ass without all the emotional bullshit.”

Jace wanted to hide under the coffee table. He glanced at Gavin, whose innocent face would have been hilarious if Jace wasn’t floundering in the conversation. He wanted to defend Gavin, to say he liked the emotional bullshit because it wasn’t bullshit with Gavin. “I didn’t say I was single,” he snapped at Charlie, “I said I didn’t have a girlfriend.”