Weight of Silence(46)

The humid air beneath the blanket filled with the scents of sweat and sex, and Jace thrust harder, held them tighter. Gavin kissed his throat, nipped his earlobes, marking every inch of skin his mouth could reach. Jace wanted so much to push Gavin’s legs higher and thrust inside him, to be moving in his body, but all of their supplies were in Gavin’s room. This was enough for now—a promise made in pleasure and trust.

Gavin made a desperate noise. His hand joined Jace’s, doubling the heat and pressure on their cocks. Jace groaned as electricity surged through him, tingling his scalp, drawing his balls up. He wanted more, needed more. He thrust harder, faster, and Gavin held him, urged him on. Whispered words he didn’t quite understand, and it was okay, because it was Gavin. Jace wanted this to last longer, wanted the intensity of emotion roiling inside of him to go on forever like an ocean wave.

When his orgasm hit, Jace cried out and pressed his face into Gavin’s neck, holding tight as shocks of pleasure crashed over him. He went boneless on top of Gavin, utterly spent, perfectly sated, his blood humming with his release. Gavin let go of his softening cock and jerked himself hard, fast. Jace kissed him, wanting to get him there, and he swallowed the noise Gavin made when he came.

In the darkness of their blanket cavern, sweat slicked and sticky with come, Jace relaxed into Gavin’s embrace. He couldn’t imagine being anywhere else.

They cleaned up and spent the afternoon in Jace’s room, watching movies on his laptop and listening to his iPod. When Gavin brought up a bowl of vegetable broth and five saltine crackers, Jace worked his way through the food without any prompting. His stomach felt tight and sloshy afterward, but everything stayed down. He even drank half a bottle of Pedialyte. Getting his body back on track would be a process, but it was a process that Jace looked forward to. It meant things were getting better.

Several times he caught Gavin watching him like he wanted to ask a question. He never did. Part of Jace appreciated the space Gavin was giving him. Another part wanted Gavin to push, to demand Jace tell that final secret so he could get it off his chest and out in the open. Jace wanted to tell Gavin; he was too scared to make that decision on his own. Scared that Gavin would see him as the coward he was for giving into Jordan’s blackmail. His good intentions of protecting himself and Rachel no longer seemed big enough to forgive what he’d done. And what he’d lied about.

He had to come clean soon, even if it was to Rachel first. She was tangentially involved and she gave good advice. She’d know what to do.

If he ever got the balls to tell her.

“Jace?”

He blinked at the fingers snapping in front of his face. Gavin watched him with a curious half-smile.

“Sorry, I zoned again, didn’t I?” Jace said.

“A little bit, yeah. Where’d you go this time?”

“School.” He shook his head like he could knock those thoughts back out. “Anyway, I’m back, and I want to ask you something.”

“Ask away.”

“Will you go with me to Molly’s party tomorrow night?”

Gavin’s eyebrows rose a fraction, and then his entire face softened into a warm smile. “Yes, I will. Planning on showing me off?”

Nerves stabbed at his guts. He hadn’t come out to anyone except his family, and most of his old high school friends would be at Molly’s tomorrow. He didn’t want to make a production out of it, or to shove his sexuality under the noses of his old buddies. “I don’t want to hide you,” he said honestly.

“You think your parents will let you out of the house?”

“I’ll be with you and Rachel all night. I think they’ll deal.” Something else occurred to Jace. “Are you cool if we skip Casper’s party in Harrisburg?”

“Sure. It’s a long drive anyway.”

He studied Gavin until he was certain Gavin really didn’t mind. “Cool. Thanks.”

“No problem. What time’s the party?”

“Starts at eight.”

“I have to work until four, so then I’ll pick you up at seven.”

“Molly only lives six blocks from here.”

Gavin grinned. “Yeah, but I want to spend a little time making out with my boyfriend before I have to share him with other people.”

“Oh really?” Jace laughed. “Then how about you pick me up at six, instead?”





When Gavin got home that night, two police cars were parked on the road in front of the trailer. Mama hadn’t called him to say anything was wrong, but that didn’t stop a surge of worry from propelling him out of the Jeep and up the front steps.