Wanted(18)

“That is true. And it is also true that you have been a fine teacher for Anna, and an able helper at the inn,” her mother said. “Your actions have shown us your sincerity time and again.”

Her father smiled gently. “It is with that in mind that we’ve been reluctant to see you go from us. But that is not the right thing, I don’t believe. Everyone needs to follow their own path, even if it isn’t quite what parents always want.”

“Yes, my Katie. It is time we let you go.”

Her mother sounded resigned. With some surprise, Katie realized this time was as difficult for her parents as it was for her. They loved her.

Katie realized one day she, too, would marry, have children, and then eventually let them go. For the first time, she was able to acknowledge her parents’ struggle—of letting her make decisions, even when they might be different from the ones they would have chosen. “Following God’s path is not always an easy one to take,” Katie murmured. “Sometimes I don’t always know what He wants me to do.”

“That is why there are rules to our society, the Ordnung. That is why He gave you family and friends, to lovingly guide you. Remember, Katie, no matter what, you are never alone.”

Katie blinked. While her father’s words now felt comforting, there’d also been a time when they’d sounded mighty confining, as well. “Yes, Daed. I…I don’t want to be alone.”

More gently, her mother murmured, “Of course not. Take care now, Katie. No one asks for perfection. We are all flawed.”

“Sometimes, it is hard to see everyone else’s flaws. I only seem to see my own.”

“Then look around you more carefully. Look at Anna and her struggles.”

Katie couldn’t help but chuckle. Anna’s attempts to become one of them had not been without amusements. Anna’s canning mishaps were becoming legendary. When she wasn’t burning her fingers on hot jam, she was struggling over the water baths for the jars. But still, she’d overcome many things. “I would never have guessed Henry would be so patient with her.”

Her mother wasn’t laughing. Instead, she pushed the conversation deeper once again. “Henry, he cares for Anna. He knows she has made mistakes, but he also has forgiven her, and seen that those mistakes made her stronger.”

Katie had never heard her mother speak that way. In the past, it had always seemed that her parents had expected only obedience and perfection. Anything less was treated as a disappointment. That had been hard when she’d been following Rebekeh’s footsteps. Her older sister—a full six years older than herself—had made everyone so proud, so seemingly effortlessly, Katie had always known that she’d never measure up.

When Katie’s silence continued, her mother leaned forward. “Anna feels the same way.”

“I know.”

“She’s made a fair amount of sacrifices for her love. She’s given up so much.”

Katie looked at her mother in surprise. “I never think of you ever seeing the outside world as something to give up.”

“Why is that? Katie, though you seem hard-pressed to forget such things, I, too, was once much younger. I know of the distractions and the temptations that can entice us all. Yet you and I only had a few years of the outside world. Until Anna came here, it was truly all she’d ever known. That is a very big sacrifice, I think.”

To her shame, Katie realized she had begun to take Anna’s efforts for granted.

“But are you sure you want to help at the Lundys’?” her mamm asked. “I fear it will be a thankless task.”

At least Katie knew she was not hoping for heaps of praise at the Lundys’. “I am not looking for thanks.” Steadfastly, she told herself that she was not looking for affection from Jonathan, either.

“Mary is a difficult child.”

Mary was still hurting from the loss of her mother. “I think I may be able to help. And I do want to help them. Even Winnie.” Winnie, who also was searching for the right helpmate in life.

“Yes, I can see that.” But still Mamm’s voice sounded doubtful.

Wondering the cause, Katie said, “Do you think Winnie has found her true love? Or do you think she’s just following a flight of fancy?”

Her mother’s eyes opened wide. “I don’t know. Dreams are all fair and good, and have their place in our lives. And as for true love—why, it’s a fanciful thing, I think. Love comes after a time of working side by side and believing in each other. But I do have to admit that I think it is not unreasonable for her to want to follow her own heart for a change. She should not be expected to always feel content to raise her brother’s children. Winnie has always wanted a family of her own.”