Undersold(31)

I smiled reassuringly. “I’m not, honestly. It’s totally fine.”

“Look, if you’re ever in trouble, or need help, or whatever, call me. I know it doesn’t need saying, but this shady stuff has me worried, so there it is.”

I laughed. “It’s not that shady, but thanks.”

“Any time.” She went back to eating, visibly willing her hangover away.

After that, things were much more comfortable between us. I felt a little guilty for leading Darcy on, but I couldn’t break Shane’s confidence, so I figured this was the best I could do. She was a great friend, and an understanding person. I knew we’d be fine.

A huge part of me thought eventually Shane would be fine with me telling people, which meant I wasn’t completely lying to her. I mean, we couldn’t be secret lovers forever, could we? I didn’t think so, but anything was possible with a man like Shane Green.

After brunch, Darcy left to catch her train back to the city, and I went back to my apartment to get ready. I didn’t have much time, so I threw on the first outfit I could find, jeans and a navy blouse, a little angry that I hadn’t given myself more space to get dressed. By the time I was finished changing, my buzzer rang, which meant the car was outside.

It felt strange going back to Shane’s place. Before, I would have been all nerves and excitement, but now I was confused. I had no idea what was waiting for me, whether he was furious with me still for having broken his rules, or if he was having me over to make amends, or if this was some kind of weird booty call. I had no idea, but I preferred the latter two options.

We reached his house, and I rang the bell, which buzzed me in immediately. I found him alone in the kitchen, drinking something red from a tall glass.

He looked up as I walked in, and his face brightened immediately. It caught me off guard how happy he looked to see me. His handsome eyes and stubbled face took my breath away, and I realized exactly how much I needed him in that moment. Every guy from the night before was a shadow of this man sitting before me.

“Bloody Mary?” He gestured toward his drink.

“No, thanks. Why are you drinking?”

He shrugged. “This is tomato juice, but I thought you might need a little help with your hangover.”

“I’m not hungover,” I said. “And how did you know I was drinking?”

“Darcy was over, and you were texting me late. And your texts weren’t exactly grammatically correct.” He grinned.

My stomach did flips. I pulled out my phone and checked last night’s messages, and he was right: what seemed like cogent thoughts then were more like drunken scrawls, full of emboli and typos. Autocorrect was not my friend, and I cursed my phone silently.

“Alright, this is a mess,” I said, face red.

“Don’t worry about it. Take a seat.” His grin softened and he gestured at a chair.

I walked over and sat down across from him.

He took a deep breath and sighed. “I feel like all I do is apologize anymore, and I hate apologizing.” He paused and met my gaze, eyes fierce. I felt myself shrink away from his passion, overwhelmed and surprised. “I’m sorry, Amy. Again, I’m sorry.”

I nodded but stayed quiet.

“I know it was wrong of me to leave like that,” he went on. “Janice walking in on us really ... upset me. You know how important my privacy is, but more than that, you’re an employee, and performing sexual favors for your boss is usually a huge ethical issue. I know you weren’t doing it for that reason, but to Janice it may have looked that way.”

I blinked. I never imagined it could have been taken that way. I definitely wasn’t doing it to get ahead. If anything, I was the one benefiting from his body. “Did she say something to you?”

“Yes and no. I talked to her about it, and we’re all fine there. But it scared me, how much I was willing to risk for you, just to be around you. I had to get away if I was going to be able to think clearly. I should have told you this sooner.”

“I understand, I mean, I get it. But where did you go?”

“Nowhere. I was here, running through my options. And I decided something.”

“What did you decide?”

“First, can you forgive me for the way that I acted?” His flint eyes stared deeply into mine, and I didn’t have any other choice.

I hesitated, and felt my self-doubt. “Are you sure this isn’t my fault somehow?”

He looked taken aback. “No, Amy. Absolutely not. You did nothing wrong.”

“I forgive you.” I felt a little breathless, but the truth was I couldn’t say no to him, now or ever.

He took a deep breath, as if relieved. He stood and moved around the island. I watched him come toward me, broad shoulders slumped, with bags under his eyes as if he hadn’t been sleeping. He stopped in front of me and took my hand.