Undersold(29)

“I don’t know this one,” I yelled back over the music. It was a packed night at City Barhouse, with hundreds of people shoved into the relatively small space like canned goods. Darcy was the only thing keeping me from spiraling into a serious depression at this point. Darcy, plus the gin and tonics she kept buying for me. I drank the last of number two and give her a wry smile.

“Who cares? Dance!” She bounced around me, grabbed my hand, and spun me around.

I wasn’t ready for it, and her spin sent me stumbling into some strange guy’s back. This was pretty typical of Darcy and me. She was graceful and fun, while I was a little plain and clumsy. That poor guy got stuck in the middle of the hurricane that is my dancing. He looked back at me, angry at first, but my sheepish smile softened him up immediately.

“I’m so sorry,” I said loudly. He stepped closer to me. A manicured beard, thick glasses, and short hair, he was actually pretty good looking in a hipster sort of way.

“It’s okay,” he said. “Got to be careful not to lose yourself too much dancing.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” I said, laughing.

He moved a bit closer to me. “What’s your name?”

“Amy. What’s yours?”

“Greg. You look good tonight, Amy.”

And you’re not smooth, Greg. “Uh, thanks.”

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“No, thanks, I should find my friend.”

He shrugged. “Alright then. Careful dancing.”

I laughed. What a weird thing to say. “Totally, well, sorry again.”

He gave me a leery grin, and I knew what he was thinking. Before he could say anything else, I moved off closer to Darcy. I tried to ignore his gaze drilling into my ass, but it was hard. I remembered now why I didn’t go out to these places very often. I tried to be nice to guys like him, but they almost never took the hint. This was what I was missing; this was the single life in a big city. Each new guy I saw paled in comparison to Shane, and made me miss him even more. They all seemed like horny children, and I couldn’t imagine going home with any of them.

“Need another drink,” I said to Darcy, nodding to the bar. I waded through the crowd, Darcy in tow.

“He was cute,” she said to me. I had to admit that he was a little bit, but meeting some random guy at a bar was never my thing. And more than that, I still held out hope that my billionaire recluse boyfriend, my perfectly gorgeous boss, would forgive me and come back to work. Or maybe at least would remember that I existed and send me a message. I couldn’t say that to her, of course.

“Cute enough I guess, but I’m not looking for that tonight, Darc.”

“Yeah, sure, neither am I.” She gave me a corny wink.

If I was going to be honest with myself, I was hurt, and I was angry. Going out with Darcy could only do so much to distract me from my problems. I couldn’t believe he would leave like that, without telling me first. It was disrespectful and careless, and the more I drank, the angrier I got. The bass from the music pounded through my head, and the packed bodies sent heat through the room. I felt myself getting worked up and sweaty, as Darcy danced around and bobbed her head, all smiles. Who did he think he was, playing with my feelings like that? Maybe I should tell Darcy and get it over with.

I wanted desperately to tell her. Darcy had way more experience with men than I did. She even knew how to turn them down when they hit on her with grace and poise, which was never something I learned. My strategy was always to run away, which I guess worked well enough. Still, she would know what I should do. I knew that if I told her, she would keep it a secret, and would probably have good advice for me. I was feeling drunk and bold and hot.

But what if I told her, and Shane still wanted to be with me? I wasn’t sure I wanted that anymore, honestly. He was a jerk. A big, beautiful jerk, who got my sense of humor, my drive, and my passion better than anyone else in my life. Not to mention he made me come harder than I thought possible.

I ordered another drink, and looked around. Men were everywhere, but every single one was like a shadow of the man I actually wanted. How was I even entertaining the possibility of not seeing him again? I knew I shouldn’t be comparing, because it wasn’t fair to anyone, but how could I go back to normal people when I’d been with someone like him? I felt like he had spoiled me with his huge, thick cock and his confidence. He had showed me what it could be like, to be with someone like him, and I couldn’t imagine anything less anymore.

I realized I was a mess. Part of me wanted to take some strange dude home just to make Shane jealous, part of me wanted to tell Darcy every little detail, and part of me wanted to go home and cry.