The Butterfly Box(199)

Mariana had sent the chauffeur to pick them up and drive them down to Cachagua. He introduced himself as Raul Ferro but didn’t speak a word of English and Hal and Federica had forgotten the Spanish they had once spoken fluently. So they communicated with gestures and followed him out to the car. The heat in Santiago was stifling and oppressive but Hal and Federica absorbed it with delight along with the long-forgotten memories. At first they sat in the back in silence, watching the scenery pass by the windows, lost in the dusty halls of their past. Then, when the car left the city and sped up the open road that cut through the arid mountains to the coast, they sat back and looked at one

another with different eyes. After years of estrangement they were at once reunited by their shared childhood and their shared longing to reclaim it.

‘I was only four when we left, but you know, I remember so much,’ said Hal wistfully, wiping his sweating brow with his shirtsleeve. ‘I feel better already!’

‘I thought it would be strange seeing it all again, but it feels as if I never left,’ she sighed, watching the heat shimmering above the road ahead like pools of water.



‘I never really felt I belonged to Papa,’ said Hal suddenly.

Federica looked at his troubled face and pulled a thin smile of sympathy. ‘I know. He ignored you didn’t he?’ she agreed softly.

‘It’s odd because I was so small, but I’ve felt his rejection through the years.’

‘You were Mama’s golden boy, though.’

That came with a price, believe me.’



‘Pretty suffocating, I know.’ Federica shook her head as she remembered her mother’s overwhelming neediness and constant discontent.

‘She’s a deeply unhappy woman,’ Hal mused. ‘I grew up with the responsibility of making her happy where everyone else had failed. You know, Arthur’s given up on her too, just like Papa did. I really thought Arthur could make her

happy.’

‘Oh, don’t give up on Arthur,’ she chuckled with a smile.

‘What do you mean?’ He frowned. ‘I thought you hated Arthur.’

‘I did. But I never gave him a chance. He’s a good man and Mama’s lucky to have him.’ She noticed the perplexed expression on his face and added, ‘I went to see him, Hal. They still love each other.’

‘Well, that’s good.’ Hal sighed. ‘She’s not all bad. Just very misguided.’

‘It’s taken a while to get over Papa, but I think she learnt the hard way. “In much wisdom is much grief,”’ she quoted wisely.

‘You sound like Sam Appleby,’ he said.

Federica grinned. ‘Do I?’

‘Yes, his pomposity is catching. You’ve obviously been spending too much time with him.’ Hal gazed out of the window. ‘Why do you suppose Papa deserted us?’ he asked tentatively, changing the subject. They had never talked about their father like this before. They’d never dared ask those questions.

Federica lowered her eyes. ‘I don’t know,’ she said, allowing thoughts of Sam Appleby to dissolve into her father’s shadow. ‘But I’m going to ask him. I need to know and so do you.’

‘What makes you think he’ll be happy to see us?’





‘I just know it,’ she replied firmly.



‘He could always have come to see us in England but he didn’t. So why’s he going to be pleased to see us now?’

‘I know what you’re saying, Hal,’ she said carefully. ‘Just trust me. I know he regrets the past and I know he still cares.’

Hal rested his eyes on the magnificence that surrounded him, so far from the cold cliffs of Cornwall and felt a deep yearning in his soul. He felt as if an invisible force was filling his spirit with something weightless so that his body felt buoyant and bursting with optimism.

Ramon sat on the terrace of his parents’ beach house, looking out across the sea that lay still and gleaming in the late morning light. He had barely slept at all for his mind had itched with guilt and anxiety - how was he going to explain himself to the two children he had abandoned long ago and left to mourn him? How was he going to explain Ramoncito to them - and Estella? Would they understand? How was Ramoncito going to feel suddenly finding himself having to share his father’s devotion when he had grown up with the exclusive

right to it? He looked at his watch; they’d be arriving soon. He felt his stomach churn with nerves. He knew he should have gone to pick them up at the airport, but he needed the moral support of his parents.

Mariana had agreed with him. ‘Much better that they see us all together at the house, less pressure all round,’ she had said.