New Year at the Boss's Bidding(22)

She thought of the hours she and Xavier had spent making love. Her body  could still feel every caress, every kiss and every hot spark of  desire. But now despair filled her heart. It hadn't helped her to move  on, as she'd foolishly believed. It had only made things worse.

'Let's hope we can escape this place today.' Xavier all but growled the  words out. He was putting distance between them. She got the message  loud and clear. Last night was well and truly over.

It's for the best, she told herself as she walked to the window to see  if escape, as he'd called it, was possible. One thing was for sure, she  had no intention of hanging around for his rejection. He'd turned his  girlfriend away, so pushing her away would be easy. She'd been rejected  by Jason and she certainly wasn't going to meekly wait for it to happen  again. This time she would do the rejecting.

Feeling suffocated and hemmed in, she roughly pulled open the curtains,  her agitation showing in every movement until she froze. She couldn't  believe what she was seeing. It was still snowing. The possibility of  leaving today didn't look good. 'No, it can't be,' she whispered, more  to herself than to the man whose brooding presence filled the room.

Behind her she heard the flick of the light switch and turned to face  him. 'The power is still out.' His eyes, cold and dark, met hers.

Could this get any worse? She'd just spent the night with the man who  was effectively her boss, shared secrets they both probably would never  have told, and now they were going to be forced to spend yet another day  alone in the same house.

'It's still snowing.' Her voice was barely above a whisper as she tried to take in what this all meant.

She turned to face him, wanting to prove to herself she was in control,  that she wouldn't dissolve into a distressed heap in front of him.  Right now she didn't care what he thought of her. All she cared about  was dousing the passion once and for all. It couldn't happen again.                       
       
           



       

'So, we are completely cut off. Snowbound.' His sharp tone caught her  unawares and she couldn't think what to do now, her mind in a panic.

'I need to leave today. I have to go.'

She had to get to Vanessa's, but, more importantly, she had to get away from Xavier.

* * *

Xavier marched to the window and looked out at the white landscape.  Snow was plastered to the sides of trees and bushes as if someone had  painted them with a brush. They could be stuck here for several days.

How were they going to move on from their conversation in the early  hours of this morning? He'd opened up to her, believing they would be  parting the next morning. He couldn't spend the day with her after that  revelation. What if they were stuck here? What would happen tonight?

He remembered every detail of last night as the blizzard had done its  worst outside. Her total innocence and how he'd let her into his mind.  But as dawn had broken, reality had begun to creep back stealthily.

'We should have tried to go yesterday.' She dragged her hands through  her hair and instantly he recalled how his fingers had slid through its  thickness last night.

Enough, he berated himself. It had been exactly that sort of emotion  that had lowered his defences, allowed her to touch his heart. The heart  he'd kept frozen for the last three years.

He looked at her face, at the horror of their situation reflected in  her eyes. He knew she thought he was blaming her. But he wasn't. He'd  messed up enough lives with the accident and now he was messing up hers,  opening up wounds he'd never known she'd nursed, wounds as big as those  he was trying to heal.

'It's not going to help to stand here, apportioning blame. After  breakfast I will walk to the road to see what the situation is.' He was  back in charge, back in control, which was more than he'd been last  night.

'I'm coming too.' The firm statement left him in no doubt that she  intended to do just that. 'I've seen more boots and coats in one of the  back rooms.'

'Va bene.' He could see any kind of refusal was useless. Thankfully,  minute by minute, he was regaining control, not only of his emotions but  the situation.

The strong, hot coffee, brewed on the gas stove, had further infused  him with discipline, so that by the time they were making their way  through the deep snow he was in a more amenable mood.

Just as when she'd arrived, Tilly wore her red woollen hat and scarf.  Her cheeks were flushed from the freezing wind and a worried look  haunted her eyes. Was it really that important to get to her friend's  house? A real friend would understand. These thoughts cluttered his  mind, filling it with questions, until Tilly stumbled into a windblown  patch of snow, which was far deeper than she'd expected, and with a  squeal of shock she flung out her arms.

He caught her instantly, his reactions quick and precise. But instead  of letting her go as soon as she was steady on her feet, he held her  close. She looked up at him, wide-eyed, and that strange sensation  filled his chest, squashing almost all the breath from him. Despite  their bundled layers he could feel the heat from her body infusing his  and the urge to kiss her was so strong he had to grit his teeth against  it.

Again she was testing him. Dio mio. What had she done to him?

He'd pushed her boundaries, knocked them down, all for his own selfish  needs, had divulged all his secrets, but he still wanted her.

'We should continue,' he managed to say over the thrum of lust. 'The  sky is looking more threatening, as if more snow is on the way.'

* * *

'So much snow.' Tilly couldn't believe it. More snow meant not only  being unable to get to Vanessa's but also being here longer with Xavier.  That was something she couldn't do, especially when he looked at her  with such intolerance in his eyes. He didn't want to be here with her,  much less be reminded of the mistake they'd made last night.

Their passion had been all-consuming, totally undeniable. She'd always  thought passion caused trouble, that unhappiness was just a kiss  away-and it had certainly proved to be true. One kiss had led to last  night and now he could barely look at her.

'We will see what the lanes look like then decide what to do.' The  command in his voice was strong, adding weight to her theory that he now  despised her. She'd pushed him to talk, forced him to reveal not just  his scars but his feelings. He was shutting himself away, becoming  unreachable.

She pulled away from him, away from the burning anger that sparked so  vibrantly in his eyes. 'Even if the lanes are clear, I'll never get the  van out of here.'                       
       
           



       

Despair flooded through her. Her mind was so full of anxiety she wanted  to drop to the snow and give up, but that would be showing weakness and  you never let your enemy see that. He may well have been her lover for  just those few short hours, but the way he was treating her now he was  as good as her enemy.

'Maybe not, but we could try and get you to the main road and public transport.'

So he was that desperate to be rid of her and the problem created by  last night's passionate encounter that he would pack her up and put her  on a bus.

'It's snowing, Xavier. Buses will not be running. Not today.' The spark  of fire in her voice shocked her and, judging by the way he looked at  her, it had shocked him too. Those coolly assessing eyes held hers and  for a moment everything was silent, muffled by the snow and the tension  stretching between them.

'Come.' The command in his voice was strong and clear, but he held out  his hand to her. She looked at it, knowing taking hold of it would  change everything. 'Natalie?'

She took his hand, not knowing why or what she hoped would happen, but  she hadn't anticipated the zing of electricity that zipped up her arm.

'I don't like this.' She'd spoken before she could think. 'Being stuck here, I mean.'

'Because of the snow or me?' He fired the question at her as he strode  through the deep snow. Finally they reached the part of the driveway  that twisted through the woods and where the depth of snow was less,  sheltered by the trees.

'Both,' she answered honestly.

They'd reached the small bridge, the stream below, iced at the edges,  leaving just a trickle of moving water. He pulled her to a stop, forcing  her to face him, but didn't let go of her hand.

'What happened last night...' he began, but she cut him off.

'No, not now.' She didn't want to hear his admission that he'd never  meant it to happen, that he'd never intended to make love to her with  such passion, because that would be too painful. Last night should have  been about just one night. A fling. But she'd let passion rule and with a  start she realised she had fallen in love with him.

She had no idea how it had happened, how her feelings had turned to  something so powerful, but they had. Now she had to block that out, stop  the surge of love that had flowed through her. And she would.