Never Been Kissed(111)

I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry I hurt you, that I drove you away. I can’t ask for your forgiveness because I don’t deserve it. I’ve done bad things, least of all with Matty. You’re lucky to be free of me.

Just know that these past few months with you have been the best in my life. I don’t remember laughing this much, or smiling this much in a long time. I know Jules would have loved you.

Thank you. For everything. For making me see what I needed to see with Matty. Again, it doesn’t feel like enough, but it’s all I can say – thank you and I’m sorry I hurt you.

That fucker.

He rips my heart out and now this? It’s a textual grovel is what it is, and I won’t be played. Then why am I crying and having a hard time getting a breath? Bastard, asshole, motherducker!

“That bad, huh?” Katie says.Jesus, I forgot she was there. I hand her the phone and get up to go to the bathroom. I wash my face with cool water, wincing at the dark circles under my red-rimmed eyes, blow my nose, get a three-pointer, and make my way out back to the living room.

“Could it be any longer?!” Of course she would complain. Of course. “Oh, oh wow. Does he have a brother? I need a clone of him, stat.”

I almost smile, and chuckle despite not wanting to. “Keep reading.”

“I can see it on your face, buddy. You think he’s playing you again. What is the use of living your life if you can’t make any mistakes? You’re not living, you’re just existing. Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me these past few months with Hunter haven’t changed you, haven’t made you happier? Fucking shit, you fell in love with the guy! That changes a person – for the better. Go ahead, tell me I’m wrong. I want to see you lie your way out of this one.”

I can’t, and she knows it, too.

“Five points to Slytherin!” Figures she likes Slytherin, the evil of all Hogwarts Houses before Severus Snape turned that shit upside down. All hail Queen Rowling, we are not worthy. “Lemme finish.”

Katie makes noises as she reads, and I wonder again, how she’s single. Guys would flock to that shit, probably wondering in their dirty minds if she would make those kinda noises in bed. I even heard the boys take bets on it one time, when we were having dinner together.

“I can’t. My heart. If you don’t want the job, I’ll be his love slave foreverrrr.”

I snort, ignoring the flash of jealousy that scores my stomach, and boils my blood. “He just... I don’t know what to think.”

“Stop using your brain for this stuff. It won’t let you try anything in situations like this. Trust me. Sweetie, you’ve been hurt, but guess what? You bounce back. You get better, and chocolate makes everything good again. Do what you feel like, but that’s my two-cents. I say go for it. He’s too hot not to.”

“He’s not just hot, K.”

“Yeah, you’re in love. My girl’s in love!” She squeals, throwing her arms around me.

“You read the end, just like I did. It’s over.”

The look in her eyes is all we’ll see about that. “Whatever you say, hotshot.”

“I’m serious. I didn’t fake that last bit of the text. He wrote it. And Jesus, he’s not Matty’s Dad. Remember that first night he asked for a movie? He said it was for his nephew. I just thought he was lying this whole time ‘cause he wanted a chance at me.”

Katie shakes her head. “Yep. So Matty’s his nephew. For all intents and purposes, the kid is his kid. Hunter is the only Dad Matty’s ever known. Poor thing doesn’t even remember his Mom. You know, this means the way is clear for you to be his Mom.”

“The thought hadn’t crossed my mind.”

“Liar, liar, pants on fire!”

I clear my throat, blush, and stutter, “Nothing’s changed. We’re done. Let’s talk about something else.”

Katie stares at me, clearly wanting to say something else for Team Hunter. I’m the only member on Team Sera, apparently.

Then she lets it go, her whole body deflates and she finally settles on a channel, giving me back my phone. I cradle the thing in both my hands, holding it close to my chest, keeping the words close. How pathetic can I be? I decide to leave it on the armrest and vow not to look at it again for the rest of the night. I fail. Repeatedly.

“Alex and Teresa’s engagement’s in two weeks,” she sighs, like this is a hardship when we both know she loves parties and the chance to show off her killer wardrobe. “We’re going to have to go shopping now that you have no more ass and all,” Katie says, settling in and crossing her legs. She put it on a UFC fight with two hulking dudes that I’m guessing must be heavy-weights.