Never Been Kissed(114)

We’ve got a whole section of the restaurant to ourselves. A massive table that seats fifteen is stuffed with our gang and empty chairs hold bags filled with bottles of wine. It’s gonna be one hell of a night, and I can’t wait to get started.

Everyone’s already here, and my stomach does a nervous fluttery thing like I’ve gone and swallowed a sting-ray. I pull in a breath through my nose, and grin at everyone when they turn to see who just came in from the banging of the closing door behind Tommy and I.

Catcalls, whistles and wolf-howls. I could trade places with a tomato, I’m so red, my blood rushing to my cheeks in a heated wave. Tommy’s hand goes to my waist and I hear him chuckling next to my ear as we walk closer and closer to the table.

I try and muster as much enthusiasm as possible. I’m not gonna be a Debbie Downer at a bloody engagement party. I can fake a smile, so I do. I say all the appropriate things, that I’m so happy for Alex and Teresa both, and I just know that they’re going to have a wonderful life together.

It feels like I’m lying to them. I want them to hurt as much as I do. That wouldn’t be badass, that would be an asshole move, and I refuse to be an asshole.

So I keep the smile on my face, and make my rounds around the table, kissing both of everybody’s cheeks, hugging closer friends and laughing when everybody comments on how good I look. I even do a few poses with my hands on my waist, cocking out a hip to the right, then to the left and pulling an almost-duck face. Those losers from Jersey Shore would’ve been proud.

Finally, I come to Katie who grins at me and tilts her head to the side, silently asking if I’m okay. I nod, and hold my arms out for a rib-cracking hug.

“You look like a Greek goddess,” she says in my ear, still holding onto my ribs.

I squeeze her back, and say, “It’s the dress. Great call, by the way. I look good.”

“You look hot,” Katie says, letting me go and swatting me on the ass. I can’t help it, I yelp and everyone stops talking to look at me. I give a dorky wave to my audience. Laughter ensues and I realize how much I missed my friends. Tonight is going to be more than okay. I’m going to make sure of it.

I get seated between Josh and Tommy, Katie opposite me with Eli and Alex on either side of her. Obviously, Teresa is sitting next to her man, uh, fiancé, smiling and showing off her rock. The man did good.

Josh puts an arm over the back of my chair and leans close to make a joke. I laugh so hard, my abs get a workout.

“How are you doing?” Josh asks low enough that only the two of us can hear. I’m grateful for the quiet, for the intimate discussion. I don’t want everyone to be listening or looking at me for answers.

“I’m getting better.” The only truthful response.

Josh’s mouth twists and he stares into his wineglass. He huffs out a breath and finally stares me in the eye. “If it gets too much...with whatever, I can drive you back home. Just say the word.”

Moved, I kiss his cheek, making sure to do it lightly so I don’t plant lip-gloss on him. “Thank you, Joshy. But I’m going to have a good time, tonight.”

His face slackens before he erupts into his belly-laugh until the whole table joins in, not knowing what they’re really laughing at.

I mentally shrug and turn my attention to Alex’s Dad and Mom serving us from the kitchen, stopping by and talking to each of us, proud of their boy and the choice he’s made for a future wife. I can see it the way his Dad keeps squeezing Alex’s shoulders as he’s seated, and in the way his Mom looks down at Teresa with a secret smile on her face, holding the hand with her engagement ring on it. All in all, really sweet to see.

We start with spanakopita which for some odd reason, Josh and Tommy take turns feeding to me from their hands. I think it’s just a way to take a gander into my cleavage, but they keep looking at Katie as if asking if it’s okay. Whatever. I’m hungry, and if they want to be the slaves to my Cleopatra, well then, so be it.

The salad comes, nothing but the simplest of vinaigrettes and awesome ingredients. The main meal consists of lamb chops, steamed vegetables and lemon-roasted potatoes with rosemary. Divine.

I try not to eat too much. My poor stomach is gonna be an asshole if I do, but it feels like for the first time in three weeks, my appetite is back and I almost feel back to normal. I even forget about Hunter, about Matty, and if I do think of them, the memories are fleeting and they don’t hurt as much when I let myself dwell on them.

I’m having a great time, and the wine is helping. Three glasses in and I feel like dancing. Teresa opens the dance floor once Greek pop music comes on over the speakers. Alex’s parents join in and whatever other patrons are in the restaurant start keeping time to the beat with clapping hands. We dance. I smile more than I have in the better part of a month, I feel like me before all this shit started with him.