Lily White Lies(39)

As she continued to repeat the single word, I let go of her hand and made my way into the hallway in search of help.

I spotted Norma coming out of a room at the other end of the hall.

“Norma! Norma, please, I need your help.” I had the attention of Norma—and everyone else who happened to be in the hall.

The sound of her clipboard hitting the tile floor drowned out every other sound in the building, including my aunt’s chanting. As Norma ran toward me, everything played out in slow motion.

“Is Karen all right? What’s wrong?”

Grabbing hold of Norma’s hand, I whisked her into my aunt’s room.

“I don’t know... she started to... I can’t get her to stop. She keeps hitting herself... and... and I think I’ve upset her.” My last words were almost inaudible.

She took hold of my shoulders and sat me on the bed in my aunt’s room.

“Okay, calm down. She doesn’t appear to be in any immediate danger. Let her get it out of her system.”

“Baby—baby—baby.”

“Oh, she’s just a whooping it up, isn’t she? She’s even more excited than she was earlier this week.” Norma laid her hands on top of Aunt Karen’s and let them rise and fall with her rhythmic movements.

“What... you mean she’s been talking?”

“Sure has. I think she started last Sunday... yeah, it was Sunday.”

I thought about what Norma said. Could my visit last weekend have been the cause of her sudden desire or ability to speak? Could I have gotten through to her without realizing it at the time?

“Is it always the same word?”

She nodded.

“Pretty much. It’s been either baby or my baby.”

I whispered, “My baby,” as I watched my aunt’s excitement begin to die down.



I didn’t say anything to my aunt once Norma left the room. It was as if I were seeing her for the first time. I watched more closely, I understood more easily and I smiled more freely. For the first time since learning the truth, I saw her as my mother—not because genealogy required me to, but because my heart told me to.

I sat by her side as she lay in bed, her eyes giving way to fatigue brought on by overexcitement. Looking intently through her sleep-laced eyes, she mouthed the words ‘my baby’ before finally drifting off.





Eleven





...His eyes flickered with love at the mere mention of her name and I wondered what it would feel like to be on the receiving end of that kind of a love-laced gaze...





Monday and Tuesday went by slowly but Wednesday was the kind of day that seemed to last all week. Brian called a couple of times each day but the more he called, the less he actually had to say, long pauses and uncomfortable silences filling the minutes between hello and goodbye. It took all of my self-control and what wisdom I possessed to keep from telling him how I really felt. I began to think that avoiding his calls would be easier than accepting them—at least emotionally.

Ron called yesterday to set up an appointment for next week. I found it a little odd that a man of his standing in the bank would make his own phone calls, but I was even more surprised when he said his goodbye before telling me the reason for the meeting. Now, as if I don’t have enough on my mind already, I have a whole week to wonder whether I’m getting the loan or an intimate rejection.

As for Gram, I haven’t had the chance to tell her what happened at Cherry Hall during my last visit, although I don’t think she’ll be too surprised. Norma told me she had called her earlier in the week, when Aunt Karen first began to speak. Gram knew long before I did that she was speaking, but didn’t tell me—and I wondered why. If my mind weren’t so full of other thoughts, I’d make it a point to find out.

Although I have many thoughts, all of which seem more urgent than the next, the one that seems to be weighing me down is the one concerning Brian’s return. He’s due back only hours before my ‘hunka-palooza’—as Cory has renamed it—and I can’t decide whether I want to stand tall and tell him what I’m feeling before I go to the party or whether I want to crawl like a coward and let my liquid courage tell him after the party. Either way, I know it won’t be pretty.



I felt myself flinch when the unexpected words broke into my thoughts.

“If it’s okay with you, Nelda and I take off now... I got tickets to Blue Bull’s game. I surprise her.”

I found myself oozing with jealousy anytime Marco spoke of Nelda. His eyes flickered with love at the mere mention of her name and I wondered what it would feel like to be on the receiving end of that kind of love-laced gaze.