Letting Go(35)
She licked her lips, suddenly uncomfortable with the direction of her thoughts.
“What about you?” she asked huskily, returning the topic to them. “Have you ever shared the woman you’re with? Is that something you enjoy?”
“With the right woman, yes. I can’t say I’m lining up to do that with you, though. I’ve spent too long fantasizing about what it would be like to have you in my bed, under my control. There’s no way in hell I want to immediately jump into sharing you with anyone. I’m not saying never. If it’s something that turns you on and it’s something you want to explore at a later date, then we can cross that bridge when we get to it. For now? I’m more focused on you and me, specifically you. I’m a selfish bastard and I’m very possessive of what I consider mine. And Joss, you are mine.”
Her cheeks warmed again, but she couldn’t suppress the surge of pleasure that winged its way through her veins.
“I’m very okay with that,” she whispered.
He smiled. “That’s good. Now, let’s get back to your boundaries and my expectations.”
She immediately tuned in, anxious to hear what all this . . . arrangement . . . entailed.
“To start with, we’ll establish a safe word for you. It’s important that you only use it when you’re genuinely frightened, uncertain or if something hurts you. If anything I do ever hurts you I want to know about it immediately because it will never happen again. We clear?”
She nodded.
“In time I’ll know your limits even better than you,” he said in a confident tone that caused her heartbeat to speed up.
“And your expectations, Dash?” she prompted.
“It’s really simple,” he said. “By offering me the gift of your submission, you’re placing your care and well-being in my hands. I expect your obedience and your respect. Now, respect has to be earned. I get that. And I’ll earn it. Obedience, however, is taught, and I’ll teach you well. You’ll obey my instructions without question or hesitation. If you truly don’t understand a command, you’ve only to ask and I’ll explain. But don’t question just because you’re nervous or hesitant about complying with my wishes, because that will not please me.”
Her eyes widened. It surprised her how horrified she was over the idea of not pleasing him. She wanted to make him happy. She wanted him to be proud of her, to take pride in her. And she never wanted to do anything to shame him or make him regret their relationship.
Was it her natural submissiveness guiding the ship here? Had she always been this way and suppressed it because she didn’t understand it or realize what it was she wanted? Or perhaps she’d only recognized it when she’d come into contact with others in the lifestyle. They’d made her see what it was she was missing.
She licked her suddenly dry lips again. “Are there punishments involved? I know some Dominants . . . Well, I’ve heard that they punish their women if they disobey or displease them. Is that something you do?”
He smiled. “Many find punishments to be pleasurable. In many cases, punishment is in fact a reward. It sounds twisted and contradictory, but pain can be very erotic, as can control and authority. As to whether I enjoy punishments, the answer is yes. In certain situations.”
“Which situations?” she pressed.
“Does the idea of my hand on your pretty ass arouse you, Joss? Does the idea of me tying you up so you’re utterly helpless and then flogging you make you hot?”
Her entire body was one giant flush of heat.
“Is it wrong of me to say yes?” she whispered.
His entire expression softened, his eyes glowing with tenderness.
“Honey, nothing about your desires and needs is wrong. Nothing. Do you understand that? I need to know what pleases you, what turns you on, your deepest, darkest fantasies. If I don’t know what they are, how can I give you what you need?”
She didn’t respond.
He brushed the back of his knuckle down her cheekbone, stroking and then sliding back up to stroke downward again. His touch was infinitely soothing. It also aroused her. Almost violently. Never had she craved something so much as his touch right now. His hands on her body. Mouth on her skin.
“In time you’ll hide nothing from me,” he continued. “There is nothing you can’t share with me. Nor will there ever be. You can be yourself with me, Joss. I’ll protect and cherish your heart and soul. You don’t need defenses around me. They wouldn’t do you a damn bit of good anyway because I intend to strip you of them. Bare. Until there’s nothing between us but your delectable skin.”