Imperfect Truth(76)
We make our way to the street and Alexandre hails a cab. I’m vibrating with anticipation with the knowledge that soon we will reach the destination of our next location. I could barely sit during our ride, bouncing like a little girl in a candy store, but in my case a little girl about to eat a decadent surprise. As we pull up to the familiar locale, my mouth waters in anticipation. Just like Pavlov’s dog. I can’t order fast enough as my grin grows wider and wider as the twenty-something girl behind the counter fills my order. Within minutes, we walk hand in hand down the narrow streets in the West Village to the sound of the cars passing. It sounds like a peaceful flow. We are carrying a box of vanilla cream filled chocolate cookies from Milk And Cookies on Commerce Street. As we make it to the Hudson River, the waters are peaceful, only reflecting the full moon. It sparkles and glitters off the surface. We sit down on a green wooden bench right off the West Side Highways bike path. We enjoy the sight of the boats drifting by. I take a bite of my cookie, the taste almost hard to describe. Pure indulgence…decadent on my tongue. A throwback to the fun childhood days, of birthday parties, and special times.
Alexandre leans into me, placing his mouth on mine. I feel his tongue gently licking at the cream that had collected. A whimper escapes my mouth.
“You’re delicious,” he says as he pulls away.
“That’s just the cookie.”
“No that’s you.” His voice is sweet and velvety...like chocolate.
The silence stretches for an eternity as we pick up our cookies and continue to eat.
“Do you remember that day Alex, the first time we went to Milk and Cookies?” I pause waiting for his memory to return. “You said no one would take my place.”
“No one did, Ava”
“No, not really. I never really had a place, so how could someone?”
“You always had a place, I just didn't know how to express it. And I’m sorry for that,” he says. “I really thought I lost you that night, and the next day at the hospital, when you told me to leave…”
I shake my head “No, I was never lost, I was just misplaced.”
The lights illuminate the water. As I watch the colors slowly disintegrate as the boats pull away, I realize I’m truly at peace.
I capture this moment in my mind…
I memorize it.
Cherish it.
With each passing minute, I understand real love builds slowly. We are falling in love again, and it feels like for the very first time…
THE NEXT MORNING I stretch out my arms above my head and shake the sleep away. I feel my leg vibrate, and realize I’m still in my clothes from last night. My phone has come alive beside me. I must have fallen asleep when talking to Alexandre, and as it vibrates again I realize I must have accidentally slept on it…oops.
“What’s up, Chica?” I say as I answer.
“Not much. What’s going on with you? Did I wake you?”
“Oh my God I have so much to tell you. No. I just woke up. Last night was amazing. Absolutely amazing. He took me to Milk and Cookies…He is so yummy,” I’m rambling, my words are coming out so fast from excitement. I doubt she can even understand me.
“Whoa, slow your roll. Cookies, huh? That is super cute. What else did you guys do?”
I proceed to tell her about the amazing date. How amazing Alexandre has been, about how we are working things out.
“It’s so crazy how things have changed. I mean after everything with Ryder.”
“You know we don’t say his name, let’s chalk him up to a one night stand gone wrong.” Jules and I laugh at my assessment of him.
“Or right, the one who will not be named…”
“This is true. No names. Dude I was pathetic…who does that?” I ask her.
“It's real life. This is what happens. We fall. In truth, can you even hate him? How can you hate someone who was instrumental in the road to finding yourself?”
“I can think of a few ways,” I laugh.
“Seriously though, everyone comes into your life for a reason, sometimes their purpose is to teach you about yourself. Sometimes the middle is more important than the conclusion.” The journey is what is really important. If it weren’t, you would just skip to the end.
“God, Jules do you always have to be all existential and shit?” My voice is rimmed with happiness and laughter. “You know how much I love you, right?”
“Yes, I do, I’m pretty amazing.”
“Modest much?”
“Nope. No need to be modest, I’m fan-fucking-tastic. I know you secretly dream of being me.”
“Oh for the love of all things holy, really? You’re a fucking idiot. Hysterical, but an idiot.”