Devil You Know(54)
“Maybe he didn’t know how,” I offer.
“Nah. He chose not to. Denial was his weapon of choice. He denied everything. Denied the fact nobody could have predicted what would happen to Mom. Denied the fact he should move on. Denied the fact he had me to care for. The guy only thought about himself, and how fucking sorry he felt for the situation we were in.”
I don’t know what to say. To me, it sounds as though his dad had issues of his own, but without knowing the full story there’s no reasonable way I can cast assumptions.
“How did you survive?”
“Barely.” He chuckles, yet the sound is hollow. “I became the hawker. I scavenged, and I begged.”
Anger builds at the image of a young kid having to stoop to those levels. He was right all those nights ago; there definitely is something worse then being thrown around from time to time.
“What made it change?”
“I met Ty. He was always a clever fucker. I could see it from the minute I met him. I knew he’d be the one to help me get a leg up on the shitty life we lived.”
“He was homeless, too?”
“We all were—all six of us.”
‘That’s how you met them.” I nod as the pieces fall into place.
“Yeah. We all had a common denominator.”
I keep stroking his hair, admiring what a strong man the guy is. The minute he took Rocco, I could see his confidence. He carries himself with an air of assuredness. The guy knows exactly who he is, and I damn well envy it.
“You’ve obviously done well to get where you are today, then.” I run my fingertips over his eyebrows, and down the bridge of his nose.
Malice shuts his eyes, and a low rumble reverberates in his chest. “Never judge a book by its cover, Jane.”
I frown. He’s clearly trying to warn me about something, but I can’t for the life of me see what it would be. “What’s wrong with this story?” I ask, tapping the top of his nose.
He smiles, and my insides melt. “I’m still waiting to write the happily-ever-after.”
“It’ll happen,” I whisper.
His eyes open, and I lose myself in those pools of chocolate. His hand snakes up, and wraps around the back of my neck to pull me down to his waiting lips. We connect, and the troubles of the world vanish. It’s only me, him, and a hell of a lot of spare time on our hands.
“Malice,” I whisper against his mouth.
“Jane?” he murmurs back.
“Is this right?”
He eases his hold on my neck to let me pull back, and watch his expression as he answers.
“Does it feel right?”
I shrug. “I’m not sure.”
“Do you want to run?”
I shake my head.
“Do I scare you?”
I hesitate.
“Now?” he clarifies.
I shake my head again.
“Do you want to kiss me again?”
I freeze in place while my cheeks redden.
He smiles. “Then it’s right.”
Malice eases off my lap and stands before me. My eyes immediately find the telltale sign of his arousal showing against the zipper of his jeans. Heat rushes to my chest.
“Come on, Jane. Let’s go to bed.”
JANE FOLLOWS me toward my room, a fine mess of emotions. Her chin is drawn to the floor, her gaze hidden, but she smiles the whole way there like a giddy schoolgirl.
I’ve got her.
Rocco pauses in the hallway behind us, and I wink at the pup, sending him on his way back to the living room. Jane walks in with a tug of my hand, and I shut the door behind her.
“I haven’t been this nervous in so long.” She laughs.
“Babe, you haven’t got a thing to be nervous about.”
Her eyes lift to mine, and she smirks. “Have you looked in the mirror lately?”
I nod. “Have you?”
That glorious shade of pink fills her cheeks, and she looks to the floor yet again.
“Babe, look at me.”
Jane eyes the wall to her left.
“Look. At. Me.” I step forward, and take her hands.
Her legs touch the bed behind her as she lifts her chin to meet my gaze.
“You”—I squeeze her hands—“are the most beautiful woman. Your smile is infectious. Your heart is so huge, despite everything you’ve been dealt. Not to mention how cute you look in my T-shirts. Babe, I could go on for days. I just want you to believe it.”
“It’s hard to when I’ve been told everything the opposite of what you said.” Her gaze drops.
I lift her chin with a finger. “Don’t stop looking at me.”
She nods.
“I’m going to lie you down on this bed. Everything I do from then on will show you how much you affect me. If we get through tonight and I haven’t made you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, then I quit.” I lift my hands, and walk backward.