Wyatt-1(Lane Brothers, Book 1)(40)

Yes I do. He would have realized what I was going through and backed off out of respect.

“Okay. Explain to me what’s got him so scared now, Jude.”

“Well, honey, the truth of it is that Bolton never would have taken a second look at you if not for Wyatt’s reaction to you. Bolton was more into the bimbo-type girl and wouldn’t have seen you if you weren’t standing right in front of him. It was Wyatt’s interest that pointed you out to him.”

So if not for Wyatt looking at me, I would have been just fine. Bolton would have left me alone, and I would never have gone through all this.

I’d have lived a normal life with normal friends and normal reactions to things instead of being a messed-up version of a woman I didn’t want to be.

“He did that to me because of…”

“To hurt Wyatt, Ellie. He did everything and anything to hurt my son, and you were just one of the many tools he used to do it. His hatred was so deep and festered that for him, hurting you even though Wyatt never went near you was enough to fill his sadistic fantasies.”

I think I’m going to be sick. No, I know I am when it hits me that not only does a small part of me blame Wyatt for it, but he blames himself, too.

“I-I need to go lie down,” I stammer, swaying to my feet with effort when I feel my head go fuzzy.

“Ellie—”

“No, Jude, don’t, I-I need to go lie down and think about this for a bit. Don’t, don’t say anything yet. Please,” I beg.

She nods and closes her eyes.

“I’ll be right here when you’re ready to talk, dear.”

I flee upstairs and collapse on the bed in a mess of silent tears and so much turmoil and emotion, it’s almost choking me.

How could he do this to me? This is all his fault!

But what exactly did the man do other than look at you across the distance and maybe wonder who you are and what you were doing?

He’s not to blame for any of this, and I know it. Everything that happened to me was the product of one sick, hateful person who twisted Wyatt’s interest in me and used me to hurt him.

I have no doubt that Wyatt would have been hurt and near frantic when he learned about what his cousin did and recognized me.

To make matters worse, I also feel a small kernel of resentment. It may be unreasonable, I know, but I can’t get over the fact that if he’d just spoken to me, none of it would have happened.

We would have hit it off immediately, no doubt, and I would have been protected before that slimy snake put his filthy mitts on me. But…doesn’t it say something good about the man that he’d not been willing to take advantage of me while I was weak and mourning my lost family?

I lie on the bed and cry silently. I know that the desperation I’ve been seeing in Wyatt lately is a result of his anxiety about me knowing the whole truth and the guilt he’s holding on to.

I also find it in myself to cry for Bolton, the monster in my dreams, under my bed, in my head, because I can’t help thinking that if not for that useless father of his, he may have grown up to be a better person than the sick, twisted husk who had no qualms about hurting me.

By the time I dry my eyes and take a breath to stop my sobs, I’ve made up my mind to just let it all go and try from here on out to live in the present.

No, I won’t forget what happened, but I’m not going to let it rule another minute of my life. Never again. I have a man who loves me, whom I love just as much in return. I have the family I’ve needed for so long. But most of all, I have me, the Ellie I used to be who saw only the good in people and tried to overcome grief because I only have one life and I’d been determined to live it the way my family would have wanted me to.

That’s what I’ll do. I will live every day as if it were the last I have, and screw anyone who so much as thinks to take that from me. Bolton is gone and I won’t allow his ghost to control me anymore.

Good for you, El. Now go get our man and lay the truth on him, why don’t ya?

I need to go and tell him that instead of blaming him like he thinks I will, like I wanted to earlier, I feel like he’s saved me.

With my heart a whole lot lighter, I jump up and run for my man, feeling lighter than I have in ages.

I’m going to be a wife and mother soon, and I find myself a little grateful to Bolton. If not for him, Wyatt and I wouldn’t be here, in love and ready to live a life Bolton will never have.





Chapter Thirteen


Wyatt

“What the hell are you saying, Jared?”

This can’t be right, none of it can be true. He throws the file at me and I read it, knowing that it is true.

“The guy he hired wasn’t supposed to hurt Ellie. He finally broke yesterday—last night, to be exact—and spilled it all. Jerry hired the guy to watch over Ellie.”