The Struggle(55)

“Can’t what?”

His gaze searched mine. “I can barely feel any aether in you, Josie.”

My stomach churned. “They . . .”

“I know why, Josie. I see the bite marks.” Those eyes turned luminous and a jolt of electricity filled the air. “Right now, all you need to be concerned with is getting better. That is all. Please.”

A couple of moments passed before I could speak. “I can’t just sit here and pretend that Mitchell doesn’t exist.”

“I’m not asking you to do that.”

“Than what are you asking me to do?” Reaching up, I knocked a strand of hair back from my face. “They have him, and trust me, he will not survive much longer.”

Seth didn’t respond.

“If you won’t let me go, then you can go back to where you found me. You can try to find him and get him—”

“No.”

Stunned, I blinked and then drew back. “Please. Please. I can’t just forget about them—about Mitchell. You can’t ask that of me. We have to help him.”

A muscle flexed along his jaw. “I don’t expect you to forget about him.”

“Then you can go and look for him,” I argued, ignoring the roiling sensation in my stomach. “You can do that and I can stay here.”

“Right now, they have no idea where we are, but we’re not warded against Titans or any other god. I’m not leaving you. Not again. You’re my number one priority. You are what I’m focused on.” His gaze met mine. “You’re all that matters.”

Frustration rose like a swelling river within me. It mingled with the very real pain that had settled into every joint and muscle, giving way to the terror that still hummed under my skin. “But you already left me!”

Seth flinched as his back stiffened.

I wanted to take back those words, but I couldn’t and I couldn’t stop what came out of my mouth next. “You left me already. You left me, Seth. So I wasn’t all that mattered to you a few weeks ago, so how can I be all that matters to you now?” Needing space, I scooted over. Seth went to block me again, but I shoved his arm away. “Don’t.”

Something akin to pain flickered across his face as he pulled his arm back. I stumbled off the bed, my skin feeling like it had been stretched too tight. I walked a few feet away and then stopped, standing on trembling legs. I closed my eyes as I tugged the hair back from my face. I wanted to feel bad for saying that to him, but it was true. He left me, and I couldn’t just forget about Mitchell. My life wasn’t more important than his.

“I deserved that,” Seth said, voice low. I opened my eyes, but didn’t face him. “I did leave you. And I wasn’t there for you when you found out about your mom or when Hyperion came for you. I let you down in the worst possible way. I cannot say I’m sorry enough. I’ll never be able to make up for how I failed you.”

My throat burned. “You . . . you didn’t know what happened.”

“That doesn’t matter in the end. You needed me and I wasn’t there.” His voice deepened, turned ragged. “I will never—”

“Don’t,” I repeated, unsure of what I was asking him to stop. Exhaustion tugged at me, like I hadn’t slept in years. Emotionally spent, I was mentally drained as I slowly faced him. Unsteady on my feet, I swayed slightly. My gaze flickered to his. “What is important right now is Mitchell. They still have him, and if we don’t do anything, he will die, Seth. We can’t let that happen.”

His jaw hardened. “I will think of something, Josie. I’m not saying I’m not going to do anything, but until you’ve healed, I cannot leave you.”

“Seth—”

“No.” The one word brokered no argument. “You were held captive for days, Josie. You were nearly drained of all your aether. Gods know all of what happened to you there.”

“I’ll be okay,” I said.

You can get mad at me,” he said, rising from the bed. He stood like he was prepared to do battle. “You can hate me for this, and I wouldn’t blame you, but I will not leave you unprotected again.”





Chapter 18


Seth

Josie had argued with my decision not to leave her until she gave in to the exhaustion that was clearly etched into every movement and drawn into the shadows under her eyes. She’d made it back to the bed, and as soon as her head hit those pillows, she was out.

I’d laid down beside her, not intending to fall asleep since I was turning over in my mind everything that she’d said. I got why she wanted to rescue this Mitchell—totally understood it—but that didn’t mean I was going to leave her. Nothing against Alex or Aiden, but they hadn’t been able to stop Hyperion before. They wouldn’t be able to do it again.