Surrender My Love(30)

“They’re talking over the treatment plan. I hope they’ll come back next week ready to proceed, but sometimes with young athletes, the parents hold all the cards. You never know.”

As they sailed into the darkness, she joined him at the helm. Her skirt swayed over her legs in the night breeze, and her eyes smiled back at him. He was falling fast for Leesa, and surprisingly, he wasn’t scared by the emotions that kept him up at night and pulled him through his long days. He felt like he’d been waiting for her his whole life.

“And how’s Dr. Braden going to feel if their family makes the wrong decision?” she asked.

He touched his forehead to hers and pulled her in against him. Her question, her concern over him, could come only from someone as caring as her.

“Honestly? I’m not sure. Part of me wanted to shake some sense into her father. That’s his baby girl. His daughter. She’s just a kid, and the idea of her continuing with her rigorous training schedule and injuring herself further scares the crap out of me.” He pressed his lips to hers and brushed his thumb along her cheek. “But that’s not something I can control.” He’d long ago learned that those types of decisions were out of his hands. He and Jon had spent many evenings helping each other through the torturous web of emotions that came with being a physician that cared.

“That doesn’t mean it’s easy to turn those worries off,” she said. “Do you want to talk about it? Your feelings about it, I mean. I know patient confidentiality needs to be respected.”

“I’m okay,” he said out of habit.

“You know what I think?” She ran her finger down the center of his chest. “I think you’re so used to shutting off this part of yourself that you’re not even sure if you’re okay with it or not.”

“I thought you were a teacher, not a psychologist.” He kissed her again, thinking about what she’d said. “I guess you’re right. I’m used to keeping my feelings about work to myself, or sharing them with Jon when we’re at the breaking point. I’ve never had anyone else to share those feelings with.” He ran his fingers through the ends of her hair. “I’ve never been with anyone like you before.”

“You’re always willing to talk to me about my feelings and about my past. I want you to feel the same freedom with me.”

“You’re right. Let’s anchor and we’ll break out that bottle of wine I brought and talk.”

As Cole anchored the boat and settled it for the evening, Leesa went down below to retrieve a blanket and the wine. They cuddled up on the bench beneath the starry sky with their wine.

They talked about his meeting and the frustrations that grew out of seeing such a clear and easy path to a patient’s recovery not being followed because of roadblocks such as overbearing parents or, with adult patients, fear of treatment or worries over needing time off from work to recuperate. As he spoke, he felt weight lift from his shoulders, and with that lifting came a modicum of guilt.

“I didn’t realize how much I’ve been keeping inside, but I also don’t want you to be a dumping ground for my irritation about work,” he admitted.

“I don’t feel like you’re dumping on me at all. When you’re in a relationship, you can’t just share the good things, or when something bad happens, there’s no foundation, no building blocks of smaller frustrations to learn and grow from. There’s not enough strength to support it.”

“Is that what happened with you and Chris?” he asked. He’d wondered what their relationship had been like. He couldn’t imagine a day without Leesa, and the thought of a man dating her for almost two years without making her his own with a ring and a wedding date was incomprehensible enough, but to leave her during such a traumatic time in her life? That was unforgivable.

“I had a long time to think about that when I was in Towson. We had it pretty easy, without any real hardships to speak of, and even though we were both teachers, we basically lived separate lives. It was easy, convenient. We didn’t talk about work, and after being with you, I realize that we didn’t talk about much, really. It sounds like a shallow relationship, but when we were dating, it didn’t feel that way. We started as friends, and I don’t think I ever realized that there was no passion between us. One night he asked me out, and we were friends, so I said yes. After that it became comfortable, and I know this sounds bad, but I didn’t have any point of reference to fall back on. I had never felt passionate about a man before the way I do with you. Remember, there was just me and my dad, so I never saw my father shower a woman with affection. Well, besides me, I guess, but that was a father-daughter relationship, not a lover. And when my friends would talk about their stomachs quivering or their heads spinning over guys, I just figured that I didn’t have that with Chris because we were friends first.”

She gazed into his eyes and knew that even if she had felt passion for Chris, it wouldn’t have been anything like what she felt with Cole.

“I never knew that anything could feel as powerful and all consuming as this does until us, either.” He pulled her in closer. “I’m not used to sharing the details of my workdays, so if you ever feel like I’m shutting you out, please tell me. I never want to do anything that makes you feel unimportant, because, Leesa, you’ve already become the most important part of my life.”

She looked at him through her thick eyelashes with so much love that he felt his insides go soft.

“If ever there was a perfect moment, it is right here, right now.” Cole kissed her. She tasted of sweet wine and hot desire. The blood from his head rushed south. It was always like this with Leesa when they were close. He intended to talk, but the minute their mouths came together, he wanted to touch, to taste, to devour her.

She kissed him hungrily, and he broke the kiss just long enough to set their wineglasses to the side. When he gathered her in his arms again, an invitation beckoned in the smoldering depths of her eyes. Every time he saw that look, his heart turned over in his chest, and he knew that feeling would grow only more intense with every minute they spent together.

“I feel like we have years to make up for,” he said before snaking his hand around to the back of her head and taking her in another deep kiss that opened the cap on his desire and sent it surging forth. Her hand fell to his thigh, squeezing as it inched higher.

His tongue swept over the seam of her lips as she opened to him. He traced the swell of her lower lip, over the sweet bow of her, earning a sexy sigh before claiming her mouth again. The way she clung to him, kissing him like she never wanted to stop, taking his breaths as her own and arching against him, spurred him on. He loved knowing what his kisses did to this overly cautious woman. His hands slid beneath her skirt, and he lifted her onto his lap. She straddled him effortlessly, gazing into his eyes, so beautiful in the moonlight, a rosy blush on her cheeks, her eyes heavy with desire.

“Leese,” he said as she ground against his arousal. “I’m falling hard for you. So hard.” He rocked his hips to emphasize his point, earning a sweet giggle as her head fell back and she opened up to him.

He fumbled with the buttons on her shirt, getting frustrated because his thick fingers were no match for the tiny buttons. He tore them open, sending the buttons pebbling against the deck. They both laughed, their eyes connected, and in the next breath, carnal need took over. He pushed her blouse off and tossed her bra to the deck, filling his palms with her luscious breasts and lowering his mouth to them. He sucked hard, and she cried out, digging her nails into his shoulders as he moaned with pleasure.

“I love your breasts, your body. You’re incredible,” he said as he lavished her other breast with the same attention.

Her hands slid down his biceps, squeezing as he sucked harder and grazed his teeth over her taut nipple. She dropped one hand to his lap, stroking him through his slacks. He tangled a hand in her hair and brought their mouths together again in a demanding kiss as she worked his zipper and set his erection free. She sucked his tongue into her mouth, driving him out of his fucking mind, then pulled abruptly back, her eyes dark as a river.

Without a word she slid from his lap to the deck and hooked her hands in the waistband of his pants, tugging them down. He lifted his hips, helping her take them down past his knees. She licked her palm, and her eyes locked on him in an erotic dance of seduction. She wrapped that hand around his cock and squeezed before stroking him slow and tight. His head fell back as she lowered her mouth to him, and he had to look. Had to see her. The sight of her lips wrapped around him, her hand stroking him, just about pulled him over the edge. He couldn’t help fisting his hands in her silky hair and guiding her efforts as she licked and sucked and blew his fucking mind.

“Leese. Stop. I’m going to come.”

She grinned, her lips curling around his shaft, her eyes filled with wickedness. She held his stare as she quickened her efforts, taking him so deep the sensitive tip of his rigid length bumped the back of her throat. Seeing her love him with her hand and mouth, her breasts bare, her hair framing her beautiful face, stole the last shred of his control.