Soldier at the Door(20)

She smiled sweetly at him and dropped his babies on his chest.

“Let me guess,” he mumbled as he slowly opened his eyes and put a steadying hand on each child. “It’s morning already.”

“According to some farm animals, yes.” She bent over and kissed him.

He grinned sleepily. “Mm, not that we have any time to argue, but I’m curious—what was that for?”

“For being my husband.”



---



Perrin struggled to sit up with his children—his baby cradled in one arm while his toddler sat unhelpfully on his belly—as his wife went into the kitchen to start breakfast. He righted himself and glanced in a quick panic at the table, then sighed when he remembered he had already cleaned up his work.

He didn’t need her seeing it.

Not again.

No one would see his calculations and notes again, now smoldering on the hearth.

He couldn’t shake Hogal’s words to him in Raining Season, right after he was injured. Hogal had said that not only was the Refuser after Perrin, but his family, too. And why?

Because Mahrree could someday prove to be a very dangerous woman.

Perrin had thought maybe some year, or decade, but not within a few moons! But there it was: Mahrree could see what no else bothered to look at. She already was the most dangerous woman in the world.

That’s why Perrin burned all his notes. He didn’t need written evidence of that lying around.

Her calculations had been correct. Her suggestions of how many Guarders there could be somewhere else, even at conservative birthrates, were staggering.

And there was nothing he could do about it, he realized. Maybe send some of the ideas to his father to suggest 15,000 in the army might not be enough? But the notion of going somewhere else? Exploring? Increasing their own family size?

People simply weren’t supposed to think like that. There were rules and limits to their world—

Why was he suddenly thinking like an Administrator?

For a brief moment he envisioned his grandfather glaring at him in disappointment. Wasn’t it General Pere Shin who told him to go over the wall, invade the forest, do what no one else could do?

Perrin did many things no one else had done, but he simply couldn’t do this. There was no way he could see successfully doing what Mahrree dreamed. He tried almost all night, but no possibility he entertained ended happily.

Everything ended in Idumea.

He adjusted his small children on his lap and kissed each one of them as they stared up at him with eyes far too wide awake for such an early hour. One pair was a dark chestnut brown, the other pair was pale blue, turning gray.

Annoy and anger the Refuser.

According to Hogal, these two soft little faces would someday annoy and anger the Refuser. Perrin sighed at his babies and tried to smile. Maybe Hogal was mistaken. He’d been up the entire night before he told Perrin his impressions of his family, and he must have been exhausted. Perrin Shin and his family were no threats to anyone—

But the words sounded hollow in his mind. Rector Hogal Densal, in all his 82 years, was never wrong. And he had dreams too. He’d never told his nephew how he knew the Refuser had a personal grudge against lowly Perrin Shin, but Hogal’s dreams were so vivid he couldn’t deny them.

And now Mahrree was having dreams.

But Perrin considered them nightmares.





Chapter 3 ~ “Such a document would be

too dangerous to discuss.”





Although it was Hycymum Peto’s day off from cooking at the Inn, she was busy in her kitchen working on a new confection she decided should be called mer-ang. At a critical moment in its whipping, she heard an urgent knock on the front door.

Conflicted, she looked into her bowl, decided whipping it even more in a minute might be a good idea, then took off her third best apron with the little caterpillars stitched on it, and went to the front door. When she opened it she was surprised to see her son-in-law, his infant son cradled in one arm, his daughter held in his other, and his face etched deep with concern.

“Mother Peto, could you please come check on Mahrree?” his deep voice quavered. “I’ve never seen her like this.”

Hycymum blinked several times to make sure her massive son-in-law wasn’t actually cowering just a bit. Then a terrible thought struck her.

“Wait—was it today?” She could already see the answer. “Why didn’t she tell me?!”

Perrin’s face went wretched. “She didn’t want to bother you—”

But Hycymum was already grabbing a sweater without worrying if it matched her skirt. “You left her alone?!”

“It’s been only a few minutes,” he defended feebly. “I—”

Hycymum pushed past him. “And I here I thought you were supposed to be a smart man! Stay here!”