Say You Want Me(76)

I stay on the phone, and he lets me know Wyatt’s not there. “Can I borrow your car? I need to find him.” I hate asking, but there’s no way I’ll go back to sleep without knowing if he’s okay.

“I’ll look for him. You stay put in case he shows back up.”

“He’s not handling this well,” I inform him.

Trent releases a heavy sigh. “I know, Ang. I tried talkin’ to him the other day, but he told me to fuck off. I’ve never seen him like this, Zach and I are at a loss on what to do. But I know him, and he’ll figure himself out. He feels responsible for hurtin’ you.”

“It wasn’t his fault!”

“I know that. You know that. It’s Wyatt who doesn’t.”

My heart hurts for him. He has been awful, but I still can’t help but only see the man who made me coffee, baked cupcakes, showed me how to fish, and took me to the cabin. He was the man who would make me feel like I was worth everything. In a few short months, he showed me how great life could be with someone.

He’s still in there. Because I won’t for one second believe that this Wyatt is the real Wyatt.

“Will you find him for me, Trent?”

“I’ll find him. Then you can beat his ass for wakin’ me up.”

I laugh. “Deal.”

Thirty minutes later, Wyatt stumbles through the door. His eyes meet mine as I stand at the door to the bedroom.

“You’re still here?” he slurs.

Great. He’s fucking drunk. “Where have you been?”

“What do you care?”

“What do I care?” I spit the words back at him. “I’ve been worried. Where have you been?”

“Out.”

“Well, that’s nice.” I huff.

“What does it matter anyway? You’re leavin’, and we’re done.”

“So, you’re going to really stand by that you never loved me? Everything we felt, everything we shared, was all a lie?”

He comes closer, and all I smell is alcohol and cheap perfume. “Nothing was a lie, until I destroyed it all.” He points to my chest. “Because you’re better off being where you wanted to be anyway. I’m doin’ you a favor.”

“By pushing me away?”

Wyatt throws his hands up and then lets them fall. “I’ve been tryin’ to tell you, baby. I’m lettin’ you go. You and I can move on now. You don’t have to look at me and see the man who took it all away!”

“You don’t know anything.” I stare into his eyes.

He squints and purses his lips. “I know what I know.”

“You’re drunk.”

“Yup!” He laughs. “I finally feel nothing. I can breathe and see straight.”

I roll my eyes and start to walk away, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me against him. Our bodies slam together, and my heart races. It’s the first time he’s touched me in weeks. We stand for a moment, breathing each other in. I’ve missed his touch. I’ve craved for him to be close to me like this, but it hurts too much. I see the hurt in his eyes. I don’t know how drunk he is or if he’ll remember this in the morning, so I decide to lay it out.

“I love you. I know you’re hurting. I know that you think all this is your fault . . .” I say as I run my hand along his jaw, feeling the scruff that covers his skin. “It’s not. It was a terrible accident where we both lost something precious to us. But I would’ve given my life up for you, not because of her, but because I love you.” Wyatt’s eyes close and a tear leaks out. “I don’t believe you’re this man. This angry, hurt, foolish man who goes out and drinks himself stupid. You’re the man who moves all your clothes out of the closet to give me room. The one who learns how to make my favorite drink. The guy who laid with me in bed and let me soak your shirt with my tears. The guy who took me fishing and showed me I could let go. The man I fell in love with wanted our first time as a couple to mean something. He fought through a very tough exterior to make me fall in love with him.” I trail my hand from his jaw so it can rest over his heart. “The man that stands here isn’t him. I’m begging you to find him. Find him before this new man finds himself alone.”

Wyatt wipes the tear from my face. “You’re leavin’ anyway. Just like you were always going to.”

I shake my head. “I’m going back for a week. It’s up to you if I return.”

I press my lips against his. I can’t stop myself. I’ve missed this so much. The kiss deepens as he lets go a little more. His hands grab my cheeks as he holds me tight. I hold his face, keeping him to me as my heart aches thinking this could be it. This could be our last kiss. I try not to let my mind go there, but my emotions are at war with each other.