Reluctant Wife(30)
But as she stared at herself in the mirror that morning it was the furthest thought from her mind. Because what she saw was a stranger, a girl she didn’t seem to recognise, quite tall and slim about the waist, a girl men saw as a seductress and worse. A girl with a cloud of guilt and shame upon her mind and blue eyes that seemed to have gone beyond shock—something she was shortly to disprove.
‘Why don’t you take Mr Milroy down to see the foal, Roz?’
‘He’s seen her—’
‘It would be no penance to see her again,’ Adam Milroy said with a smile. ‘It’s also a lovely day.’ He was casually dressed in khaki twill trousers, rather dusty leather boots and a plain white shirt open at the throat.
But Roz was having trouble concentrating on anything but trivia—such as why Mrs Howard should suggest she should change out of her jeans, only then to suggest she go for a hike across a paddock to find Nimmitabel and the old mare.
And not long out of the house her overburdened mind grasped some more trivia. It was a nice day, with the sky blue and clear and the hailstorm only a memory now. There was a gentle breeze stirring the peppercorns around the shed—and she rather wished she was dead.
She stopped walking abruptly out of sight of the house and said jerkily. ‘I’m sorry, but I don’t want to go any further. C-could you tell me what you wanted to see me about now?’
Adam stopped beside her and looked down at her with a frown between his eyes. ‘What’s happened? Has Stan Hawkins …’
‘No! I haven’t seen him again.’
‘Then something’s gone wrong here.’
Roz looked up at him in agitation. ‘Please, if you could just …’ But she couldn’t go on.
They’d come to a fence, one of Mr Howard’s neat, white painted fences, and Adam leant one elbow on the top rail and propped a dusty boot on the bottom one. Then he looked at her directly and said, ‘All right, I’ve come to suggest that you and I get married, Roz.’
For a heart-stopping moment Roz thought the world had stopped and sent her spinning into space. What actually happened was that she stepped backwards in her utter amazement, tripped on a stone and all but fell before he caught her in his arms.
Then she realised he was laughing and she tried to twist herself free but couldn’t, so she glared up at him and spluttered, ‘If you think it’s funny to make jokes about something like that, I don’t!’
‘Oh, I wasn’t joking,’ he drawled, but with his dark eyes still glinting with amusement. ‘Nor was I laughing at you so much as myself. Well,’ he added with a shrug, ‘something like that.’
She stared up at him and could feel her heart beating wildly with shock; she didn’t seem capable of leaving the protection of his arms. ‘But it doesn’t make sense! Why would you want to marry m-me?’ she stammered. ‘Especially if you find it so amusing, whatever the reason.’
‘Roz,’ he searched her troubled, totally bewildered face, drew her closer briefly, then let her go but took her hand and looked around, ‘there’s a bench over there. Come and sit down and discuss this with me.’
The bench was beneath an old willow tree and in some places the green leafy fronds nearly touched the ground, so it was a cool private spot. He kept hold of her hand as they sat down on the bench and stretched his free arm along the back of it.
‘First of all,’ he said presently, ‘what I found amusing was that since I’ve made a lot of money I’ve had rather a lot of women … indicate to me that they’d be very happy for me to pop the question. Whereas you nearly fell down with shock. I found it refreshing and, I guess, ironic.’
‘It shouldn’t be ironic,’ Roz said quietly. ‘We barely know each other. It would be ironic if among all those women who’ve wanted to marry you, you found someone you desperately wanted but couldn’t have.’
He smiled faintly. ‘Point taken, my wise young friend.’
‘I wasn’t trying to be nasty or clever,’ she said quickly.
Adam threaded his fingers through hers in silence. Then he said, ‘I know. Another plus in your favour, Roz, but the fact remains I did find it so, even if all for the wrong reasons.’
She stirred restlessly, but her hand stayed in his. She said urgently. ‘That’s still no reason to want to marry me. Should … shouldn’t people fall in love to want to marry?’ She waited, then said anxiously, ‘Don’t you believe in love?’