Redeeming You(59)

Cam looked to the side and exhaled loudly. “You’re right. I did tell Alec I loved Bre, but obviously you didn’t bother to listen to the entire discussion. If you’re going to eavesdrop, you might as well do a good job.”

She raised her eyebrows mockingly. “Go on.”

“I love Bre like a sister or a friend. That’s what I told Alec. We grew up next door to each other. My parents think of her as a daughter. It’s complicated.”

Taylor looked everywhere but his face as her stomach rolled with a sudden onslaught of jealousy. Jealousy that Bre would always know Cam better than her. Jealousy that his parents might never accept her into the family like they did with Bre. Jealousy that she might never get a chance to meet his family. All of it was too much to take in at the moment.

Cam forced her face upward so he could look into her eyes. “But she’s not you. Not even a close second.”

“Is that good or bad?” Taylor whispered, her eyes wide and a little frightened to hear his response. She felt as though her whole life depended on his answer.

“Good. Better than good. You’re exactly what I want.” Cam bent his head, dusting her lips with gentle, soft kisses. The tension, the stress, and the worry about their future slowly drained from her shoulders. Cam had magic lips. “Tay, I don’t love Bre as anything more than an old friend. She knows it and I’ve known it since I opened my eyes and saw the way she looked at Jax. I just had a hard time accepting it. I thought I had pushed her away, but she was never mine to push away, or at least not since she met Jax.”

“Then why all the drama?” she asked, shaking her head in confusion.

“What drama?” Cam’s thumb slowly stroked her cheekbone, his eyes drawing her in like no one else could.

“The women, the video, the self-destructive crap.” She took a deep breath. She hated thinking about Cam’s life a month ago.

Cam smiled, but it wasn’t his carefree smile that she loved. He looked a little sad, a lot regretful and tiny bit whimsical. “Maybe it was the only way I’d find you.”

She kissed him softly, then pulled back. “I like that answer, but the truth would be nice too.”

He tapped the tip of her nose. “I think it is the truth. Don’t knock fate.” When she rolled her eyes, he sighed. “I don’t know how to explain it. I have great parents. They love me. They support me. I’m lucky. We had the white picket fence life down to the last detail. Then Bre moved into the house next door when I was ten and her life was so different from mine. She always looked sad and lonely and I decided I would be the person who changed her life for the better. I know it’s silly. We were just kids. I mean, what could I do?”

“It’s not silly. It’s sweet.”

Cam rolled his eyes. “A guy doesn’t want to be called sweet. Sexy and handsome would be better.”

“Whatever.”

“Anyway, I had it in my mind that I’d be the one who would make her happy and I failed. The minute I came to California, I shoved her to the back of my mind and forgot about her and put my needs first. And that’s not even the worst part. I hurt her. I abused her trust and I didn’t support her when she needed me because I was too wrapped up in my own bullshit life to be bothered with what she needed. When I realized what I did, I didn’t like myself very much, and I became self-destructive.” He looked down.

Taylor pushed Cam’s shaggy blonde hair from his eyes. “We all make mistakes and she found Jax. She’s happy now. It’s all good.”

“And I found you.” His fingertips were feather soft against her skin as his hands traced her jaw line, her neck and the tops of her shoulders until he reached the knot at the back of her neck securing her silver silk halter-top. He played with the ends of the ties and then his fingers glided along the skin of her bare upper back. “Do you believe me? I don’t want you to think I love Bre like that because I don’t and I’m not sure I ever did. It just took me awhile to put all the pieces together.”

His face was so earnest she knew he told her the truth. “I believe you.”

“Thank god.” He grinned as his fingers continued to explore every inch of her exposed skin. “I can’t decide which is softer, your skin or this shirt.”

Shivering, she arched into him. He pulled on one end of the knot securing the back of her top and he pushed it down her shoulders exposing her breasts to a cool rush of air from the overhead air conditioning vent. Bending his head, he kissed the top of her right shoulder moving downward, pausing every couple inches, until he stopped at the top of her breasts. He looked up at her; his eyes focused one hundred percent on her, telling her everything she needed to know about how he felt about her without saying a single word.