Razorblade Kisses(43)

She and Rachel were sitting in the den, cross-legged and passing a joint between them, when Noah came home. Emery had just given Rachel her graduation gift.

“It’s called a Mere Infinity ring. The blue stones are diamonds. I didn’t even know there were blue diamonds,” Emery chirped happily. “I found it at this cute little boutique and it made me think of you.”

“It’s so cool! I’ve never seen anything like it.” It was two rings that fit together to create an infinity symbol, the diamonds at the curve that showed on her finger. “This is kickass, Em.” Rachel had her hand out looking at her finger. “I sort of want to put it on my middle finger so my birds will be prettier.”

“It reminded me of us. You’re so solid for me. You’re beautiful but strong enough for us both, for infinity. Or at least that’s how I feel.” She shrugged. “I’m glad you like it. It’s by Heather Henry Designs, and she has a ton of stuff you’d like. It was between this ring and another one.”

Rachel leaned across her folded legs and embraced Emery. “I love you, Em.”

“I told you she’d like it,” Noah commented. He was wearing a blue checked long-sleeved button down and khaki cargo shorts. He kicked off his leather flip flops and plopped down in the La-Z-Boy next to Emery.

“Your feet are disgusting,” Rachel commented.

“Your face is disgusting,” he retorted.

“At least people don’t cringe when they see my face.”

“They don’t?” he joked. “At least my feet can be hidden.”

Emery enjoyed the exchange. “It’s hard to hide something all the time,” she commented as she passed the joint back to Rachel.

Both Rachel and Emery froze and their eyes locked on each other at the slip. Hiding was hard and it got harder every day. Every time she shared a little bit of herself, not Emily, she got scared. She feared she was going to make a mistake and lose everything, lose Noah. She worried the normalcy she’d allowed herself to feel in Nashville would slip away and she’d been left with nothing.

“I mean, you have to take your shoes off sometime, right?” Emery tried to make a joke, but it made Noah look at her funny.

“Everyone is hiding something,” he said.

Noah had allowed her the out again, not pushing but just allowing this elephant in the room to make a home with them both. He left the room after that, bringing snacks and water from the kitchen. Emery wondered what it was about him that allowed him to make her feel so safe, and the realization hit her. He accepted what she gave him and didn’t ask for more, didn’t push. Safe.

“Whatever, asshole, I don’t have to hide shit. Some people like this face,” Rachel interrupted the silence that settled in the room.

“Some people are lying.” Noah turned to the TV and clicked it on with a smile on his face.

Emery pulled herself up from the floor and leaned over Noah, crushing her lips to his. Once Noah got over the shock of it, his lips worked with hers and his hand went into her hair. He pulled her onto his lap and cradled her without separating their mouths.

Rachel cleared her throat. “Well, this is uncomfortable,” she deadpanned. “It’s like seeing my sister make out with my brother.” She got up and looked at them both intensely. “On that note, I will take my leave.”

“Em can stay in my room tonight so you can have the bed,” Noah informed Rachel, his right hand grasping Emery’s thigh.

“Well…” For once Rachel was speechless.

“Night, Rach.” Emery giggled. The numbness of the chemicals in her body allowed her to be this person with Noah and she liked it. Sometimes she wished she could go through her entire life this way, ignoring everything and just feeling him.

Rachel turned on her heel and stomped toward Emery’s room.

Noah’s hand crept up Emery’s leg and past the hem of her shorts. When he reached her bikini line, she moaned. He got up from the chair, still cradling her, and practically ran into his room.

“Please don’t let me hear that again!” Rachel called from Emery’s room.

“Oh, you’ll hear it,” Noah yelled before slamming his door.





CHAPTER TWENTY

Where’s Scooby Doo When You Need Him?



The summer was long and hot. Emery was getting closer to finishing school and was hoping to get her degree in six more months. Noah had been around more; they’d watched movies and eaten more take out together. Then his senior football season started. She knew he’d disappear as usual and he did. During football season she took more classes and worked more nights. Sometimes she worked double shifts on the weekend to make as much money as she could. Emery didn’t understand why she felt the need to stockpile money, but she figured that Phil wouldn’t continue to just pay Rachel forever. At some point she’d have to stand on her own. She looked forward to never having to take another dime from him.