Outside the Lines(80)
I look into Ben’s dark eyes, and he takes my hands. “That’s what I want,” he confesses. “Ultimately, that’s what life is about, right? Finding someone who will take care you of, who will still love you, no matter how bad it gets. And I know we haven’t been together that long, but I want that person to be you.”
He brushes my wet hair out of my face. “I went to your house Thursday evening because I was scared if I called, you wouldn’t answer. Because I didn’t answer, like an asshole, and I’m sorry. I convinced myself it was over, but when I woke up today, I knew I couldn’t let things end.”
“I’m glad you didn’t. I don’t want them to end either.”
“I don’t know what the future holds for us, but I do know I don’t want to think about it if you’re not by my side.”
He holds me against him, and I listen to his heart beating. Lightning flashes above us and we stay tangled together on the bench.
The wind and rain intensify and Ben holds me closer, then leans over to kiss me, not stopping until we both need air.
“Can we pretend this didn’t happen?” I ask as I play with a button on Ben’s shirt.
“That’s fine with me,” he says with a smile. “And to be clear, do you want to officially be my girlfriend?”
I’m smiling back. “Of course.”
He brushes my hair back. “Good.” He kisses me once more. “So is your sister-in-law going to freak out that you’re dripping wet?”
“Nah, we already took the pictures. As far as I know, my job here is done.”
“That’s good to hear.” He slides his hand down and grabs my ass. “Because I want to dance with you.”
“That means I have to go back in looking like this.”
“No it doesn’t.” He takes a step back, putting one hand on my waist. “You can hear the music.”
“All I hear is rain.”
He twirls me around. “That is the music. Dance with me, Felicity?”
My wet hair sticks to my face as I turn my head up. “Of course.”
*
“I could get used to this view,” Ben says, lazily pushing off the large porch swing on the back deck of one of my parent’s cabins.
I sip my coffee, watching the sun come up over Lake Michigan. “It’s easy to get used to. And even easier to miss.”
We stayed at the wedding for a while after Ben showed up, then left so I could go home and change. It was cold being soaked with rain and in the air-conditioning. Plus, Ben and I had some passionate make-up sex to follow through with.
“Did you plan to come back here?”
I take another drink of coffee. After the sex, we stayed up talking, smoothing things out until we both felt better. What happened was the first fight, and we both agreed it wouldn’t be our last. I don’t want it to be our last. Because people fight, people get mad over stupid things, and people even say stupid things they don’t mean.
But they make up.
Because that’s what you do when you love someone.
“I don’t really know,” I confess. “I like Grand Rapids, and it’s not so far I can’t come back here. And I like to travel around. I guess when I imagine myself settling down to pop out a few babies, this town would be nice to call home. Maybe. I don’t know. It’s so far away.”
I rest my head against Ben’s muscular shoulder. The swing slows and Ben pushes his foot on the deck again, keeping us in motion.
“But then again, this is all I know as far as childhood,” I say. “If that makes sense.”
“It does,” he says. “And I moved around so much it’s hard imagining what it would be like to have stayed in one place.”
I nod, thinking how difficult that would have been for me. “We got a few years before either of us need to worry,” I say, then feel embarrassed. “And a few years before we decide if that worry is together or not,” I backpedal.
“Right,” he says. “Not worried yet.” We swing in silence, and I finish my coffee. I set the cup down and twist so I can wrap my arms around Ben. “Tired?” he asks.
“Yes. Want to go inside and lay down?”
“I do, but I don’t want to move.”
I softly laugh. “Same here.”
A few minutes later, we get up and move inside and in bed. Ben’s wearing boxers and nothing else, and I have on his T-shirt and undies. We snuggle close together, hearts beating in sync. I close my eyes, listening to his heart beating.
Everything is right in my world again.
I have what matters. Love. Someone who sees me for exactly who I am and accepts me fully. It hits me then, that this is what life is all about. Not letting anyone confine you, not limiting yourself to fit in. Being you, and being happy.