Out of Nowhere(57)

He stands and strips for bed.

“But if you swore off fighting, then why did you help me that night? The night we met. I—I mean, I was out of it, but I saw you. You took those guys apart.”

Rafe steps close to me and leans in until his mouth is close to mine. “I couldn’t help myself,” he murmurs. “I saw you sitting at the bar earlier.” He kisses my throat and I lean into him. “You looked so nervous. Miserable. And—fuck, I don’t know what it was.” He kisses my shoulder. “But I’ve never wanted anything so much in my life.” My heart starts to hammer, and I wrap my arms around his waist. “When I saw you were in trouble, I just—” He pulls me hard against his chest and holds me. “I just ran after you. Didn’t even think about it until it was all over.”

He runs his hands through my hair, then pushes me down onto the bed and crawls on top of me.

“I just knew I had to get to you.”





WHEN I get to the YA parking lot, no one’s there. I find everyone in the basement. Rafe catches my eye immediately and he gives me an apologetic look. When I get closer, I can see he looks tired. Stressed. Mikal, Carlos, Mischa, and DeShawn are in a tight huddle, and everyone is talking at once. And what they’re huddled around is Anders. And he’s shaking.

Ricky’s standing off to the side, rocking back and forth as Dorothy tries to calm her down and keep an eye on Anders at the same time.

“I hate your dad!” Mikal yells, clenching his glitter-polished fingers into a fist and snarling. The others echo his sentiment, but Anders just keeps looking at the ground like he doesn’t know what to do with his friends’ anger. And when he does look up, it’s Rafe he looks to. Rafe, who’s standing still, whose shoulders are set tight, and who’s holding his hands behind his back like a bouncer.

Carlos is the first of the kids to see me. His “Hey, Winchester” is subdued. I’ve never seen him look so serious.

I’m not sure what’s going on, but I can tell Anders isn’t going to talk with everyone staring at him. “Hey, guys,” I say to the kids. “Let’s go outside and I’ll let you, um… hit our car with a tire iron?”

Rafe’s head jerks up and I shrug at him. Anders’ lip starts to tremble a little more, and I gesture the kids toward me. They’re reluctant, but I herd them out with promises that vehicular violence will help them get their aggression out. I know I guessed right when, at the door, I turn back and see Anders slowly dissolve into tears, shaking in Rafe’s arms the second his friends aren’t there to see.





RAFE’S SWING of the tire iron is so powerful that he almost busts through the top of the trunk.

“Holy shit,” I mutter.

Mikal, Carlos, and Dorothy went to town with the tire iron before they dispersed, everyone agreeing they weren’t in the mood for a workshop, but they were timid and didn’t do much real damage. Mischa left right away. DeShawn just stood, bulging muscles tensed beneath his spotless white button-down, and watched the action, arms crossed like he was holding himself in check. Ricky watched out of the corner of her eye, but didn’t participate either.

Rafe thought I was kidding when I handed him the tire iron, but since he said he didn’t want to go to his boxing gym, I figured it’d help him get some aggression out. He seems almost surprised at his own power and looks at me nervously.

“Go for it,” I say. Not like we need to open the trunk for anything.

He looks around to check that no one’s going to see, then proceeds to beat in the trunk of the car until it’s totally concave. He’s breathing heavily, but he doesn’t look quite as tense as he did. He clears his throat and hands me back the tire iron, staring at the damage he just inflicted.

“Hey, now it’s an El Camino,” I tell him, tossing the tire iron in the backseat since I definitely can’t get it back in the trunk.

“You want to run?” Rafe asks, drifting close to me but not touching.

“Yeah. By my house?”

Rafe nods. I keep offering, but Rafe never wants to run by his apartment and never wants to hang out there. I get the feeling he doesn’t spend much time there, period. He’s started leaving running clothes at my house.

He walks to my car with me and sinks into the passenger seat, keeping his eyes closed as I drive.

“Is he okay?” I ask. “What’s up?”

Rafe sighs deeply. “No. Not really.” He rubs his eyes. “His dad found out he’s been coming to YA and he’s furious. The kids need parental permission since they’re minors and Anders didn’t have it, so he can’t be here. He started coming with Mikal, and it was right after Javi died. With everything that was going on, I… I must’ve forgotten to check. Fuck, I can’t believe I was so stupid.”