Momentary Marriage(103)

“Out of…love,” he said, “I deceived you, if that makes any sense at all. I offered you what you wanted, a husband who wouldn’t threaten you emotionally, who wouldn’t try to get you to make promises you were determined not to make.”

“But you said…,” she began, the words stumbling to a halt.

“I said anything I thought would get you to marry me,” he finished for her, feeling the flush of shame across his cheekbones. He’d handled the whole situation poorly, had ended up doing the one thing he’d never meant to do, hurt her.

“You told me you just wanted sex." she said, the words as tight as her face.

“I know,” he said. “I lied. I knew you wouldn’t marry me if I let you see I was emotionally involved. So I didn’t tell you. I lied by omission, but it was still a lie.”

Kelsey shook her head, incredulity slipping into her expression. “This is a first. A man lies to a woman about not loving her when he does? Why would I believe this?”

“I don’t know. I know it sounds crazy,” Jared said, “but it’s true and I’ve decided to stop trying to hide the truth from you. The thing about Amy and Doug, my arranging for her to work in London? I admit it. I was trying to get you three off dead center. I’d met you and…fallen pretty hard—“

He broke off, the words unable to force themselves through his throat. Taking a breath, he started again. “It didn’t take long to size up the situation between you and Doug—he’s worked with me a while and said a number of things about you that told me how he felt about you. When I signed on with the agency, I met Amy and…you.”

“And you fell for me,” she said, her tone still disbelieving.

“Yes.” He kept the word as even as possible. “Once I saw the set-up with you three, I just…watched.”

“You watched me?” she echoed in horror.

“Not like that,” Jared corrected her impatiently. “When we had contact through normal business, I simply paid attention. From little things Doug and your sister let drop, and from your own behavior towards me, I concluded that although you were active socially, you made sure you never got too involved with any man.”

“That isn’t true,” she protested quickly. “I’ve had long-term boyfriends.”

“Three months, at the most,” he dismissed.

“So you decided I was screwed up and needed your intervention?” she accused hotly.

Jared hesitated. “That’s not the way I’d put it, but I can see how you might feel that way.”

“You charged in on your white horse,” Kelsey jeered, “and started manipulating us all.”

“I offered Amy the job overseas,” he corrected, “thinking she’d shake Doug up and that maybe he’d get over his infatuation for you…which I hoped would leave you without a port in the storm.”

“You bastard,” she spat out. “Like I was some sort of—“

“Acquisition.” He supplied the word in a low voice, keeping his gaze steady on her flushed face. “Yes. I realize now how arrogant it was.”

“And you expect what from this admission?” Kelsey demanded furiously.

He shrugged. “I’m not sure what to expect. Credit, maybe, for finally coming clean? A chance to show you I’ve realized the error of my ways.”

“You maneuvered me into wanting to get married?” she asked incredulously, “and now you confess and expect me to forgive you?”

“No,” he said with a short laugh. “I didn’t really maneuver you into wanting to get married. Regardless of how devious you think I am, I’m not that good. I was totally floored by your plan to get married. But when I saw the way you were thinking, I had to step in, to take a risk and marry you under admittedly false pretenses.”

“So you’ve been lying to me all along,” she said, her eyes bright with unshed tears.

“Lying about not loving you,” he admitted. “Lying about wanting a temporary marriage. I never wanted to divorce you after a year. I hoped I could prove myself to you, convince you how good we are together and that we should stay married.”

“So when you told my mother we were going to have kids,” she said slowly.

“I totally slipped up,” he admitted. “There I was getting married to the woman of my dreams,

dancing with her mother at the wedding. I slipped.”

“The wedding?” Kelsey said, her eyes hard.

“Had to be one we’d remember,” he said. “I meant every vow.”