Momentary Marriage(100)
And there were family photos, studio shots of him and his wife with their three kids, dressed up and smiling for the camera. So happy, so…complete. While his Kelsey had grown up with she and Amy being shuttled between step-fathers like a disease no one wanted to catch.
It made Jared burn.
Other than being a slime-ball father, however, the guy was squeaky clean. No illegal activities, no affairs. He even paid his traffic tickets promptly. So he wasn’t a bum, but somehow that seemed to make it worse. Layton took care of everything but his daughters.
Jared would have enjoyed squeezing him a little. But here he sat, holding the envelope with the guy’s life in it, doing exactly nothing.
Kelsey’s words made him hesitate. You’ve been nothing but underhanded with me from the beginning. She was right about that. In the hours between midnight and morning, he’d been thinking about his part in all this. He’d pursued her because he’d known somehow that she was the woman for him. But had he acted in a loving manner?
From the beginning, he’d deceived her, hiding his interest, watching and noting her reactions, her concerns, as if she were a business he wanted to merge with rather than a woman he wanted to marry.
In his first marriage, he’d never really invested himself, hadn’t paid his wife enough attention, hadn’t cared enough. This time he cared more than he could believe. Every breath he took without Kelsey hurt. From the first, she’d emblazoned herself on his senses like fireworks on virgin film.
He felt she was a part of him, an indispensable other half. He wanted to be there when she needed him, wanted to take care of her when she was sick. Ached to hear her low laughter in the dark next to him.
He couldn’t imagine living without her, but from the beginning, he’d lied. Failed to be honest with her. It didn’t matter that his reasons sprang from the heart, that he’d pursued her for all the right reasons. In his anxiety to earn her love, he’d forgotten to trust her and hesitated to be trustworthy, in return.
Yes, she was a woman who held men at bay with the greatest of ease. A beautiful woman who withdrew from men only brought out their hunting instincts. Kelsey played a more skilled game. She dated, flirted, smiled, even kissed. Most men probably never knew she was evading them.
None of that excused his behavior because—he was being brutally honest with himself at last—he’d been deceitful out of fear. He’d wanted to win the fair princess without ever risking himself.
Look at the fact that he’d never told her he loved her. Not in the heat of passion, not once during their last argument. He’d said a lot of things, but never the one that would have left him standing stripped in front of her. Never the words that would have given her a loaded gun aimed at his heart.
He was a coward. He’d chastised her for holding back when, all the while, he was failing to trust her with his heart.
Jared stood, tossing the envelope on the chair as he paced the terrace.
He didn’t know what to do. Any step he could take would be specifically designed to get her back. He loved her. But manipulation wasn’t acceptable anymore.
He wanted his wife back and, yet he’d tied his own hands. Even if he apologized for his deceit and then told her he loved her, how likely was she to believe him?
She had to freely choose, he thought again. He had to let her decide to come back.
And he thought it might kill him if she didn’t.
***
“Dearly beloved, we come together today to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony,” the minister intoned.
Squeezing Amy’s hand in his, Doug sent up a silent prayer of thanks. They were about to take a major step and he’d never felt as confident about anything as he did about marrying Amy.
She stood next to him, beautiful in an off-white suit, a tiny wisp of a veil on her head. Returning his clasp, she tightened her own fingers momentarily, a brilliant smile on her face.
Doug shuddered to think of his life if she’d actually taken Jared up on his offer to give her a job in London. Thank heavens, he’d had the good fortune to be loved by a patient woman.
“Into this holy union ,” the minister said, “Doug and Amy now come to be joined….”
What a fool he’d been, Doug thought, to so nearly miss his Amy in his crazy dreams of Kelsey.
Around them in the tiny wedding chapel, stood his family and…surprisingly, Amy’s father with his wife and children. As the minister spoke briefly about the joys and tribulations of marriage, Doug remembered Amy’s uncertainty about inviting her father to the wedding.
But after hearing about Kelsey’s visit with him and his reasons for abandoning them, she’d decided to give the man a chance. Chloe wasn’t the easiest woman in the world to live with, Amy had said. So she’d called her father and been pleased when he’d eagerly accepted her invitation. Her mother had said she couldn’t return to the states for the sudden ceremony, so an awkward meeting of ex’s had been avoided.