Master of the Desert(25)

She couldn't see Ra'id when she reached the edge of the oasis, so she  dropped her clothes and plunged naked into the water. The sudden chill  on her overheated skin was like a healing balm, and as she powered into  her first stroke she felt her cares float away. Everyone needed time  out, Antonia reflected, rolling onto her back so she could stare up at  the lantern moon. This precious time in the desert had been a welcome  reminder that she could make a difference if she tried.

She would make a difference, Antonia determined, idly swishing her hands  in the water to keep her afloat. Turning towards Ra'id's beautiful  pavilion, she started swimming towards it. This was a scene that  belonged in one of her fantasies, but if it had been she could have  engineered a happy ending rather than this travesty: Ra'id and Antonia  trapped in the middle of a drama of their own making, a drama that  should have ended well before they made love …

But thank goodness it hadn't ended, Antonia reflected, caressing the  still-flat planes of her stomach as she waded out of the water.

He watched Antonia until she was safely out of the water and dressed  again, and then, without her seeing him, he returned to the campfire he  had lit earlier. Should he show her what he had found in her mother's  room? Was she ready for it, or had she suffered enough emotional  upheaval for one day? Would it be better to throw it on the fire? While  Antonia had been scooping something off the floor, he'd been  too-something that had dropped off her mother's dressing table, another  pathetic, hand-scribbled note.

'Ra'id!'Antonia exclaimed, drying her hair with a towel he'd laid out ready for her. 'You're cooking fish again.'

'In anticipation that you will fillet it for me again.'

'I might,' she said, her lips curving at the memory, though she hunkered  down a good distance away from him. 'Of course I will!' she exclaimed  now, as if some thought had suddenly occurred to her. 'If you promise I  can have that water.'

'A filleted fish in exchange for my precious water-supply? Do you think  I'm mad?' He might as well have added 'Do you never give up?' But he  knew the answer to that already.

'Shake on it?' she said boldly.

He looked at the tiny hand stretched out to him, and just in time  remembered how the desert affected him. It was another magical setting,  where they could be anyone they wanted to be while they were here-the  only difference now was they both knew there were consequences to  embracing that freedom.

'You're smiling,' she said as he ate the morsels of fish she had prepared.

'Am I?' He frowned.

'What's wrong, Ra'id?'

He wasn't about to share his thoughts with her. He had concluded that  the enemy to duty wasn't self-indulgence, but love. He wasn't sure he  had the weapons to fight that enemy off. 'Why don't we have a swim?' he  said, badly in need of a change of scene.

'It's too soon,' she cautioned him.                       
       
           



       

'Then we can stroll round the oasis, and when I judge the time is right I'll throw you in.'

She was off like a hare from the traps. 'Not if I see you first,' she called back to him, laughing.

They didn't make it to the water. The restrictions of the real world had  been lifted again and nothing stood in their way. She was young,  seductive and he wanted her.

She was fine until Ra'id brushed against her. He'd kicked sand over the  fire and helped her clear everything away. She had identified the thick,  nobbly palm-trunk behind which she intended to leave her clothes, and  he was at the water's edge when something frightened her, a crawling  thing …

A harmless lizard, Ra'id reassured her as it scuttled away.

'Okay, so I'll get used to them,' she said determinedly.

'If you intend staying in the desert, I'd definitely advise it.'

There was humour in Ra'id's voice and warmth in his eyes. She didn't  imagine it. She had been hanging on for a sign that he would mellow so  they could discuss the future together, and it turned out the desert had  cast its spell over him again. In the capital he was the undisputed  king, but the wilderness was a leveller that stripped everyone's  position in life away. And Ra'id came out of that well …

Very well, Antonia reflected, feeling increasingly aroused as he  continued to stare at her. There was so much strength in his dark gaze,  so much wisdom and understanding of her needs.

'You're aroused,' he murmured.

'Am I?' she whispered, making it sound like a challenge.

'So aroused, if I touch you you'll come.'

She was too shocked to answer, by which time she was in his arms. He  carried her into the pavilion and laid her down on the freshly laundered  cushions. She was enveloped in the scent of sandalwood and sunlight as  she sank into their scented folds. Moments later she was naked, and so  was Ra'id; he had judged her level of arousal perfectly.

'You greedy girl,' he murmured as she abandoned herself to the onslaught of pleasure.

She was whimpering, open-mouthed in surprise that such levels of  sensation were possible when he eased her legs over his shoulders. Being  back with him was like a miracle, and so was the speed with which he  could coax her into readiness again.

'Let me ride you!' she demanded, desperate to feel him deep inside her.

'You set the pace,' Ra'id agreed, settling back on the cushions.

She lowered herself cautiously. Ra'id was huge, and she had to take him  in gradual stages. His touch was tantalisingly light on her hips as she  sank slowly down. Then he was touching her, delicately, skilfully with  one fingertip, and she was moving faster, with more confidence … wildly,  and with abandon.

He turned her so fast she had no chance to protest-and why would she,  when he was giving her exactly what she needed firm and fast?

Ra'id climaxed violently with her, and they clung to each other for  minutes that turned into drowsy hours; two people, so close they were  one.

'Do you ever tire?' she asked him a long time later.

'With you?' Ra'id gave her an amused glance. 'Never.'

This time he made love to her tenderly, as if he cherished her above all  things. She wouldn't allow herself to believe that, of course. She knew  it was some primal instinct at work that prompted a man to feel that  way about the mother of his child. If she allowed herself to believe in  his feelings for her, Ra'id really would possess the means to break her  heart.

But he didn't make it easy for her. Brushing her hair back from her  face, he moved slowly and deeply, kissing her eyelids, her lips and her  neck, making love as if they had all the time in the world and he  rejoiced in that as much as she did.

Dawn was busily brushing away the clouds of night when she woke in his  arms. Would she ever become used to Ra'id's strength, or his beautiful  body? Antonia wondered, snuggling close, determined to make the most of  whatever time they had.

'So, you're awake,' he murmured.

'Just,' she admitted, loath to be the first one to break the spell.

'It can be like this always, Antonia. For you and me.'                       
       
           



       

'What do you mean?' She turned to look at him.

'We can be together,' Ra'id said, as if that were obvious.

'And the baby?'

'Of course the baby,' he exclaimed softly. 'We would be a family.'

She rested against him, thinking how wonderful that would be-how  perfect. But life was never perfect. Ra'id was a king, and whatever plan  he had brewing in his head she wanted to hear it before she agreed.  'Tell me more,' she said.

'Not now.' He smiled a slow, sexy smile. 'It will be a surprise.'

When had she learned to be such a pessimist? Antonia wondered, moving  away. How much more did she want than this? Coming back to rest her head  against Ra'id's naked chest, she inhaled his familiar scent, telling  herself that nothing could be more perfect than this. She should be  happy. She should be optimistic about the future.

So why wasn't she?

Because this was all an illusion, Antonia admitted; this wasn't right.  Or, rather, she wasn't right for this. She wasn't her mother, and she  wanted more than to be hidden away-the sheikh's plaything. She wanted a  family. She wanted to work. She wanted to make a difference.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

HE SENSED the change in Antonia and knew he would have to work hard to  reassure her that his plan for her would work. His father had blanked  out a son and had dumped his discarded mistress in the desert, but he  would never do that. Freedom was as important to him as it was to  Antonia, and was the bedrock of the constitution he had installed in  Sinnebar. 'I'm going to take another swim,' he told her, 'While you can  have your own private stream to yourself.' She smiled at him as he  glanced towards the back of the tent where the luxurious bath-house was  situated.

His life was nothing without Antonia's bright flame in it, Ra'id  realised as he grabbed a towel and strode away. She consumed his every  waking moment and invaded his dreams at night, filling him with hunger  for her, as well as the absolute determination to keep her at his side.