Let It Snow(76)

No thanks. Tessa would take a pass on that extremely complicated topic. Better to keep them distracted with shiny objects like babies, weddings, and wine.

“So,” Tessa said to Amy as she sat down, adopting her best let’s-dish-some-gossip voice, “how are the wedding plans going?”

Amy’s face lit up. Clearly, she was delighted about the opportunity to talk about her favorite subject. “Well,” she revealed, face glowing, “it’s going okay. I may have underestimated how much work it was though. But I want to get married before I’m showing, because, well, not that I’m a vain person or anything, but—”

“She wants to look smokin’ hot in her dress,” finished Nikki.

“Yes, that,” agreed Amy readily, an even wider smile crossing her face. “And I just want to be Mrs. Kellan.”

“So is everything okay? Do you need me to help?” Tessa asked.

“You’re doing enough. Thank you so much for agreeing to take the pictures.” Amy then explained, “Nikki, my mom, and Lauren are doing most of the heavy lifting. Even though I feel fine and I keep trying to explain to everyone that I’m not sick, I’m just pregnant, they still want me off my feet and out of the winter cold as much as possible. And I do appreciate that. I haven’t been dealing with much in the way of morning sickness, but it definitely has been a drain on my energy reserves.”

The thought popped into Tessa’s mind unbidden of the daydreams she used to have about when her and Jake would be planning their wedding. Then for some reason, the thought if that had happened, the little baby that was, right now, nothing more than a drain on Amy’s energy and a warm spot of love in her heart would be an adorable little moppet who would call her Auntie Tessa.

Tessa’s eyes closed involuntarily with the strain of pushing those thoughts away. She absolutely could not indulge in that kind of thinking. It was far too dangerous. It led her down paths that were too difficult to come back from. Tessa knew that being here in Hope Falls was only temporary. The day was going to come—and it would probably come sooner rather than later—when she was going to have to pack up her PT cruiser and drive right back out of town.

It was going to be hard enough as it was. She had to protect herself. Leaving Hope Falls—and leaving Jake—had nearly destroyed her once. She had been so empty inside that fleeing to one war zone after another had actually been a welcome relief. That capturing the unimaginable pain on the faces of people whose lives and worlds had been ripped to shreds, had seemed like a natural extension of the wasteland that had lain inside her.

She couldn’t go back there. She had barely survived it. She didn’t know if she could survive it again. Especially now that Gran was gone.

She shook herself mentally and returned her focus to the topic at hand—Amy’s wedding.

“So you’re all set then?” Tessa asked.

“Actually, Karina”—Amy turned to their dark-haired friend—“I have favor to ask you, with regards to the ceremony, as a matter of fact.”

Karina lifted her wine glass in a mock toast. “Ask away, girl! You know I’d do anything for you!”

Amy smiled. “Excellent! Then would you mind singing ‘Hold Me Tighter’ at the ceremony? Matt and I both love that song.”

“You got it, babe!” Karina readily agreed.

“Oh!” Tessa exclaimed. “That’s always been one of my favorites! I just love the chorus. It’s so romantic. It makes me melt!”

Karina’s face took on a knowing expression, and she sent Tessa a conspiratorial wink. “Well, I should hope so,” she laughed. “I think you might be able to relate.”

Tessa was confused. She looked around at the rest of the ladies in the room, wondering if she was the only one who didn’t get the reference, but no one jumped in to explain and everyone looked equally as confused as she felt. Finally, she asked, “Why? Why would I be able to relate?”

Karina grinned, clearly eager to fill her in as she held out her hands in a grand ta-da fashion. “Because I wrote that song about you and Jake.”

Tessa froze. She could see from the shocked expressions that no one else had been aware of this either.

“What do you mean?” she asked quietly.

“Well, I remember the exact day in high school. I saw you by your locker, and you were looking kind of sad. Then Jake walked up behind you and wrapped his arms around you. You sank back against him, and you just looked so peaceful and radiant… And he looked so protective and”—Karina shivered—“male. Then the chorus just played in my head. At that moment, it all just flowed. ‘Hold me tighter than I’ve ever been, save me from this world within. The way you wrap me in your arms, tells me all that’s in your heart. I feel your love when I feel your touch, so just hold me tight tonight.’ I mean, seriously, I couldn’t grab a notebook fast enough to get it all down!”