Giving In(60)

He smiled, contentment ever growing in his soul. “If you run, I’ll just come after you and drag you back to me. I won’t let you get away, baby. Not unless that’s truly what you want. I want you to be mine, but more than that, I want you to be happy and for you to feel safe. Always.”

She closed her eyes, visibly collecting herself, and when she reopened them they burned with earnestness. “I love you.”

The simple statement with such a wealth of emotion behind it was staggering. He felt humbled by the love and trust burning in her eyes. Never had he felt more unworthy than right here and now but he wasn’t going to turn down such a precious gift. Ever.

He squeezed her tight, savoring her softness against his much harder body. “I love you too, Kylie. We’ll make it, okay? We’ll get there. Just give us time.”

Her gaze lowered but not before he saw the flicker of pain in her eyes.

“I feel like such a failure,” she admitted. “I know I can trust you and yet I couldn’t even be intimate with you without tying you up. It sounds so ridiculous. Here I’m saying I love you and I trust you and we didn’t even achieve penetration. How does that not make me a huge hypocrite to say one thing and do something altogether different?”

His heart turned over at the consternation in her voice. He nudged her chin up with his fingers, forcing her to meet his gaze.

“Baby, this is a huge leap forward for us—you. There is no hurry and I don’t want you beating yourself up over this. I’m happy and you’re happy. Nothing else matters. In time you’ll trust me enough to let me make love to you. You’ll trust yourself. Until then, you’ll tie me to the bed each time until you feel confident enough to take the ultimate plunge.”

Her lips turned down into a grimace. “I wish I were as confident as you.”

“I have enough confidence for both of us,” he said gently. “We will get there, Kylie. Rome wasn’t built in a day. This will and should take time. It’s not something we can take too lightly. You have to absolutely feel safe with me, because if we jump the gun, we can do far more damage by trying to rush things. I’m perfectly content to leave things as they are until you’re ready to take that final step. You don’t have to apologize nor do you have to justify your fears. Not to me. Never to me. I love you and love is about doing whatever it takes to safeguard the one you love.”

She leaned up, pressing her soft mouth to his. “I love you so much,” she whispered against his lips. “I don’t deserve you or your patience but I thank God for both. I never imagined feeling this way about anyone. It’s scary and beautiful all at the same time.”

He kissed her back, slow and sweet, his tongue tasting her, lapping tenderly at her lips and tongue. Then he leaned back, simply savoring the connection between them. This moment when they both laid themselves bare. He didn’t want this moment to end. Didn’t want the outside world intruding on something so new and beautiful. Fragile and vulnerable.

“Not to change the subject but we didn’t talk about my conversation with Dash and I promised you full disclosure. And I can’t think of a better time to talk to you than when you’re in my arms all soft and sweet.”

She smiled. “What does it say about me that Dash and my job were the absolute furthest things from my mind?”

“I think what it says about you is that you were too focused on me and, while that may make me an egotistical bastard, I like that you aren’t thinking of anything else when you’re with me.”

She kissed him again before settling back so she could see him. Her hair spilled over the pillow like satin. She was nestled on her side, her legs entwined with his. He was already sporting another hard-on, but he didn’t try to hide it. He wanted her to know how much he wanted and desired her. How beautiful he found her.

“So what did Dash have to say? And what exactly did you tell him?”

He stroked his hand down her body, unable to keep from touching her as they conversed. There was something decidedly intimate about talking about even mundane topics in bed, wrapped around one another, a barrier to the outside world.

“I told him to start looking for another office manager because your talents were wasted in that area. I told him I wanted you to have the rest of the week off. You need rest, but admittedly that’s me being selfish because I like having you all to myself and I’m not ready to let you go just yet or share you with anyone else.”

She looked pleased with his statement and not at all angry that he was basically making decisions for her when it came to her job. He had to tread a very fine line because even though he’d given her control when it came to their lovemaking, it was only natural that his dominance asserted itself in other areas.