Finding Eden(38)

He grinned. "I just thought, you know, I've never had the chance to take you on a proper date and I had a feeling you'd like to bowl."

I laughed, leaning forward and placing my forehead on his. After a minute, I pulled away just a little bit and whispered, "Madison?"

Calder shook his head. "Did you even think it was a choice, Eden?" he whispered back. "For me it's not. I . . . " Looking into his eyes I saw vulnerability as if he wasn't sure of what I felt for him—how could that be? He sighed and bit his lip, and continued, "I want to make sure it's not for you either."

I opened my mouth, but the words stuck there. I shook my head back and forth.

A fresh batch of tears coursed down my cheeks. Relief filled Calder's expression before he leaned forward and kissed them away.

"Also, that's a really large flower." He nodded toward it, his eyes widening.

I laughed softly. "Shh, it's finally sleeping. Don't wake it."

We stood up and continued hugging and kissing and wiping away tears as everyone around us started clapping and whistling. I laughed up into Calder's handsome, beloved face and he smiled tenderly into mine.

I saw my mom approaching us in my peripheral vision and pulled away from Calder. She came up to us and reached out her hand saying, "I'm Carolyn." Her voice was wobbly.

"I'm Calder." Calder reached out to her and shook her hand. There was an awkward moment when their hands missed because they were both staring at me and then Calder went in to hug her and my mom turned to me and we all sort of collided. Laughing, we finally wrapped our arms around each other, standing there in a group hug as my mom and I sniffled back our tears.

When we pulled apart, Calder said, "I was wondering if I could take your daughter out tonight?" He smiled at her and then looked over at me.

My mom seemed conflicted. "Well . . ." She looked around at all the people staring anxiously at us, waiting for her to answer. She smiled a sad smile over at me and then looked at Calder. "Yes. But please bring her right back, okay? And take care of her?"

Calder nodded. "I promise."

My mom squeezed my hand and kissed my cheek. I took Calder's hand as he led me out of the garden. When I got to the edge, I turned around and waved at everyone and called, "Thank you all so much." And then we walked inside the house to the sounds of the group calling out their goodbyes.





CHAPTER SEVEN




Calder



Eden's hand was warm in my own as we stepped into the deserted kitchen right off the garden.

"I should change first," she said, turning and gazing up at me.

For a few seconds I allowed myself to get lost in her eyes, those deep blue pools I never thought I'd get to gaze into again. I let the moment soothe my wounded, battered heart. Finally I nodded.

"Want me to wait, or—"

"No, come with me," she said, but neither of us moved. We stood there gripping each other tightly for several minutes before she pulled me by my hand through the large kitchen.

We climbed the stairs and Eden led me down the wide hall to her bedroom. She closed the door behind us and immediately started unzipping the side zipper on her dress. She let it pool around her feet, murmuring a "thank God," as the gargantuan flower fell away from her chin. I chuckled softly and then moved my eyes slowly up her body. I hadn't taken the proper time to drink her in the night before. She was still slim, but she looked more womanly now somehow, her hips just slightly more round, her waist even smaller, and her small breasts round and firm in the white strapless bra she wore. My body surged to life, pressing uncomfortably against my new dress pants, the ones I'd bought just an hour ago so I could show up looking appropriate for her mom's party.

I'd spent the day just as I told her, reliving the beauty we'd experienced together. I hadn't had it in me to go there in my mind over the past three years and I had needed it. I had needed to spend time with the us we had been in order to feel ready to move forward into our future. I'd gone to Madison and told her. It hadn't been easy, but I owed it to her to be honest immediately. I had never envisioned a future with her. I’d never been able to. I should have given her all or nothing at all. And it had never been in me to give her my all. I'd have to live with the regret I felt for hurting her.

Eden rolled her tights down her legs and tossed them aside and then glanced over at me and paused, color moving into her cheeks. "Is it strange that I feel self-conscious in front of you?" she asked, sadness sweeping through her expression.

I walked over to her, taking her hands in mine and shaking my head. "We have a lot of reacquainting to do, Morning Glory. There's no handbook for this. I doubt if there's even a self-help book that could touch what we've gone through. We're on our own here."