Finding Eden(42)

We clutched each other for what seemed like a very long time as my heart slowed to a steady beat and I listened in awe and thankfulness to the sound of hers under my ear, which was wet from my tears.

"Just for the record," I finally mumbled, "this is not how first dates are supposed to go."

Eden laughed softly and then sniffled, kissing the top of my head. "No, in general circumstances, this would not be a good beginning."

I chuckled, too, and then sat up. Eden leaned forward and kissed my cheeks, rubbing her face against my own so that our tears mingled. She smiled against my mouth and then kissed me lightly. We kissed gently for a few minutes, me sucking her bottom lip between my own and nibbling at her mouth. It was slow and gentle and soothing to my soul.

After a few minutes of that, my blood started to heat to a point that wasn't going to be comfortable parked in Xander's truck in a public parking lot. So I pulled away and scooted back over to my side of the truck. I looked over at Eden who was wiping away the last of her tears.

"This is going to take some time before it feels like reality," I said. "It's going to take a while before I have a handle on my own damn emotions." I laughed self-consciously and looked over at her.

"You don't have to explain it to me, Calder," she said very gently.

I nodded, looking out the windshield. I could hardly explain the relief that coursed through my body to know I was perfectly understood. I’d always had Xander who got it more than most people could. But he also hadn't lost the love of his life the day he lost everything else. But now you have her back. The love of your life is sitting right next to you.

I reached over and grabbed her hand, that same tremulous joy I had felt at her mom's party filling my heart. Gods above, I couldn't keep up with my own emotions from one second to the next.

I looked over at her and raised my eyebrows. "Ready to make some bowling memories?"

She raised one eyebrow. "Will there be nachos?"

I laughed. "Hell, no."

She laughed and we got out of the truck and walked into the bowling alley together.

Fifteen minutes later, we had bowling shoes on and were directed to our own lane.

As I typed our information into the computer, Eden went about finding a bowling ball. When I finished, I stood up, looking around for Eden. I didn't immediately spot her and panic surged in my chest, making my heart speed up and my blood pump faster. I swiveled my head everywhere, panic setting in. "Eden!" I called. Several people looked over at me curiously. I jumped up on one of the chairs to get a better view over the tops of peoples' heads and called Eden's name again.

A guy at the lane to the right of me said, "You missing a kid?"

I shook my head. "No, my . . ." My words trailed off as a blonde head came into view, Eden turning the corner of a shelf of bowling balls and walking back toward me. The smile on her face faltered when she saw me standing on the chair probably looking panic-stricken. I hopped down and raced toward her, exhaling and pulling her in to me, the bowling ball she held colliding with my stomach. I didn't care. I held her for a minute, allowing my heart rate to return to normal.

"Whoa," she whispered, "you okay?"

I nodded and forced a small smile. "Yeah, sorry. It's just, I turned around and you weren't there, and—"

"I get it," she interrupted, smiling at me. "Sorry. I just couldn't find a ball that I could even lift. I just went around the corner." Her brows furrowed. "It will get better for both of us." She looked at me encouragingly.

I nodded and smiled again, leading her back to our lane. God, I hoped it would get better. Would I ever be able to let her leave my presence again without a feeling of dread taking over my body?

Eden sat down and I leaned in and kissed her lips, smiling and trying to lighten the mood. When I stood up, the guy in the lane next to me was looking at me with a small frown on his face. Yeah, I probably looked like a nutjob, panicking because my girlfriend turned the corner. Oh well, he didn't know the half of it. Did any of us ever know the half of it when it came to other people? Likely not.

I walked up to the lane and lined up my shot like I'd seen countless other people do as Xander and I had sat shoveling free nachos into our hungry bodies. If someone had told me then I'd be the one bowling, with Eden, a couple years later, I would have punched them in the face for trying to pull such a cruel joke.

I stepped forward and let the ball go. It glided down the lane, making a sharp turn at the end and knocking over the one pin to the far left. Well, that wasn't good. Still, I turned around and said, "Yes!" walking back toward Eden.

She laughed. "I don't think that's actually very good. You got one pin."