Don't Follow Me: A High School Bully Romance (Diamond In The Rough Book 4)(10)

I snickered. “So what did you do?”

She shrugged. “I’m in the middle of a career shift. I took this job a couple months ago to help out with money and bills. And I’m back home with my parents while I take a condensed program to become a dental hygienist.”

“And that’s what you want to do?”

“More than anything. It’s a nice balance of not dealing with sick people, not dealing with sick animals, and pulling a nice paycheck.”

I nodded. “Congratulations.”

“The point I’m trying to make is that figuring out what’s important to you takes time. And even if you do feel locked into college, it can always change. Keep focusing on getting good grades. Apply for those scholarships. And when you stumble across what you want to do with your life, you’ll know. Deep down.”

I smiled. “Thanks. I appreciate that.”

She patted my hand. “I like helping people. And I like working with kids, too. Like you. That’s my specialty going into my dental hygienist program. But there are stepping stones I still have to follow. I’m only twenty-two, though. And you’re only eighteen. Find your stepping stones, Rae, and take them one day at a time.”

I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. “This means a lot. Thank you.”

“And don’t be so damn hard on yourself. Switching directions isn’t a big deal. It’s your life. Live it how you see fit. Okay? Promise me.”

I nodded. “Okay. I promise.”

“Good. Now, take care of these customers coming down the aisles. They’re headed straight for you.”

I rang up the customers with a smile on my face. But not a forced smile. Not like my smiles had been. It felt a little more effortless this time around. And I kept stealing glances at Pauline. As annoying as she was at times, I found her words comforting. I’m glad she took the time to prod at me until I talked. Because I needed to hear what she had to say.

And hopefully, as time passed, I could become as brave as her.

Ready to take on the world, no matter what anyone else thought of my path.





8





Clinton





I was thankful Cecilia let me borrow her car for the night. Because I really wanted to pick Rae up from work before this dinner with her mother tonight. I wasn’t sure I wanted to go after everything Rae told me about her, though. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep my mouth shut. What she was doing was wrong. Bleeding money from Rae was wrong. And I wanted to put my two cents in on the matter.

But I’d promised Rae I wouldn’t say anything.

I pulled into a parking space at the front of the line and sat. I turned up the music, bobbing my head as I watched Rae through the window. She stood there, wiping down her register. And I saw someone new walking up to her. The girl looked like she worked there. But I didn't recognize her. And when Rae looked over at her, she smiled. Genuinely. With that light in her eyes.

It was good to see that light coming back.

I listened to music and mouthed the words as I waited for her to come out. And when she came out through the automatic doors, I beeped my horn and flashed my lights, rolled my window down and waved at her, finally catching her attention. But when she looked up at me, her smile didn’t light up.

Not like it did with her friend inside.

Huh.

“Ready for dinner?” I asked.

She walked around and got in the car, sighing.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

I took her hand. “Are you sure you don’t want me to—"

She shook her head quickly. “No. Don’t say a word. It’s not your place.”

“Since when is it not my place to defend you against people taking advantage of you?”

“Since that person is my mother who likes you.”

I shrugged. “I don’t care if she likes me. All I care about is how she treats you.”

“Well, I care if she likes you. So don’t screw that up tonight, okay?”

I paused. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to press a button.”

“Can you just drive, please?”

I pulled out of the parking lot and we rode back to her house. Silence fell between us, and I hated it. After the night we’d spent together this past weekend, I figured things might change. That her attitude toward me would change. That her opinion of the things I did might change. But after we woke up the next morning, it felt as if nothing ever happened, like we hadn’t made passionate love before falling asleep beside one another. She couldn't wait to get home. She didn’t even stick around for a cup of coffee before she rushed out the front door.

Like I was nothing but a little booty call that got too out of hand.

I hated all of this.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

I drew in a silent breath. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not okay. Nothing about me is okay right now.”

“We’ll get through it. Like we always do.”

“We’ve been trying to get through it for a while, now.”

I came to a stop at a light. “Can I be blunt?”

She nodded. “Sure.”

“Is this you trying to break up with me?”

She whipped her eyes to mine. “No. Hell, no! Why would you think that?”

“Just seemed like the perfect wind-up before the swing, that’s all.”

She took my hand. “I’m not breaking up with you, Clint. I just--know I’m not okay right now. And I don’t know how to get okay again.”

I brought her hand to my lips for a kiss. “Just stop shutting me out. You’re doing it all the time. Like I told you, even if your thoughts are jumbled, I want to hear them. I want to help you work through them. Like you did for me.”

“I’m not good at this, am I?”

I chuckled. “You’re really not. But that doesn’t mean you can’t get better.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be. You’re used to being everyone’s rock. And sometimes, a rock that has been standing on its own for too long forgets how to lean against another structure. Because it’s too dug down into its ways.”

She paused. “Where in the world did you pull that from?”

The book I’m writing. “Just came up with it.”

She giggled. “You should write it down somewhere. Use it in one of your stories.”

Just tell her about the book, Clint. “Maybe I will.”

As we pulled into her driveway, guilt flooded my stomach. Here I was, telling her to be open with me when I couldn't even tell her about my latest venture. Writing my own book, for once. A dream gone wild one night that spurred on the daydreaming I did of an entire world beyond our eyes. Fantasy. Epic fantasy, with sword fights and magical powers and dragons galore. I’d never been so eager to write in all my life. Every night, I recorded conversations I wanted to happen between my characters. Every morning, I took my ass to the coffee shop and used their computers to type up my character’s next moves.

“Ready to go in?” Rae asked.

I nodded. “Ready when you are.”

I’d tell her in due time.

When she wasn’t struggling so much.

The two of us walked inside and the smells of enchiladas wafted underneath my nose. I heard Luciana humming in the kitchen as I closed the door behind me. My hand slid to Rae’s lower back. I guided her into the kitchen. Though, it didn't shock me that I felt some resistance on her end.

“Perfect timing! Sit, sit. I’m almost done with the rice. Can I get you a drink, Clint? Water? Soda? Juice? Milk?”

I chuckled at Luciana. “Water’s fine. Thank you.”

Her mother smiled. “And you, honey?”

Rae paused. “Uh… soda?”

Her mother giggled. “You sure about that?”

Rae murmured. “I’m not sure about anything.”

The words caught me off-guard as her mother continued to whirl around the kitchen.

I rubbed her back after we sat down at the table. Rae kept her eyes forward, even as her mother set her soda down in front of her. She looked almost dazed. Like she wanted to be anywhere but here. I was worried about her. Especially after that comment.

She wasn’t sure about anything?

Did she also mean us?

“So! How was work tonight, honey?”

Rae nodded. “It was good. Five more shifts, and all.”

Her mother sat down. “How do you feel about that?”

Rae shrugged. “It is what it is. Time to move on, I guess.”

Her mother paused. “You could always take some time off, you know. Postpone school. Stick around here with your old mom for a bit.”

I butted in. “She’s already put in her two weeks.”

Rae cast me a glance. “I’m just taking it a day at a time.”

Her mother sighed. “Well, know my doors are always open for you. Okay, honey?”

So long as you can get your hands on her wallet.

We all dished up our food, but the table was pretty silent. Very tense. Definitely not the kind of family dinner anyone wanted to have. Rae’s mother kept peeking over at me and winking. And whenever Rae looked up, her mother patted her shoulder. Rubbed her back. Tried to comfort her daughter.

“You sure there’s nothing you want to talk about?” Luciana asked.

Rae sighed. “Well, I did have this conversation with my co-worker today.”

I paused. “That new one I saw you with?”