Beauty and the Biker(12)
“I’m no good for her.” It’s all I can bring myself to say because I know he’s right.
“At this moment in time I’m inclined to agree with you, but you could be good enough for her if you tried. You haven't fought even a little for her, so you’re right; you’re no good for her.”
His words burn and drive me to pick up the pill bottle next to me. They’re for the pain, but I don't think the doc realizes I’m not using them for the external pain anymore. They numb me and help me forget all I’ve lost.
“I love her so goddamn much, Lucias, I just want what’s best for her.”
“Then be what’s best for her.”
Popping the top of the bottle, I look down at the pills. I stare at them for a second and put the lid back on. I throw the bottle over to Lucias, and he snatches it with one hand.
“Get me the cards the doctor gave me, I’ll make some calls.”
I have to at least try. For her.
Chapter Twelve
SAVAGE
May 2012
“Push, push, push, push!” the trainer screams at me, making my head pound. Dropping the weighted bar, I let out a string of curses. I’ve been at this for fucking months, and I don’t even feel close to having my strength back.
“You’re doing it all wrong,” Lucias says, strolling into the gym. “Watch and learn, I’ll teach you how you control a savage.” He smirks, thinking he’s being clever. The name has really started to stick, it seems.
“Get back under there; I’ll get you to lift it.” He nods for me to lie back on the bench.
Lying down, I grip the bar, trying to push it up. It comes off an inch, but I can’t seem to get it to move any more.
“I saw your shortcake today. I think she was on a date with some preppy-looking guy. What’s with all these stupid fucks popping their collars? Don’t they know they look like dipshits?”
Anger rushes through my body at Lucias’s words.
“See? Told you.”
It’s then I realize I have the bar fully extended out.
“Do I get a cut of your pay or something? Or does the insurance company just pay me direct for doing your job?” Lucias asks the trainer with a smirk on his face, one I’m about to remove with my foot.
I drop the bar back down and go to make a grab for him, but he sidesteps me.
“I was just fucking around, Savage. I didn’t see your girl.”
I give him a hard look, but I feel a smile hit the side of my mouth.
“One step closer,” he says, and I nod at him in agreement.
Chapter Thirteen
SAVAGE
June 2012
“The nightmares are easing off, but I’m still having about one a week,” I tell the doc, trying to get her to understand. I don’t care that I’m having less, I need to be having none.
“Abraham,” she says, putting her pad down on her desk. “We have come so far, you’ve gone from having them every night to having them once a week. That’s a huge improvement in such a short period, but you’ve got to give it more time.”
She’s been saying this for weeks, but it feels like it’s been months. Each day I’m away from Julie feels like an eternity. I have to get this a hundred percent under control before I go for her. When I have the nightmares, I lose control.
“You need to give yourself more credit. You’ve made significant progress, and with your positive attitude and hard work, I have no doubt you’ll make a full recovery. Just don’t beat yourself up. Sometimes you’ll have setbacks, but that doesn’t mean you’ll go back to square one. We’ll keep working at this until you’re healthy.”
“How much longer, doc?”
“Only time will tell, Abraham.”
Chapter Fourteen
SAVAGE
August 2012
“You’ve really made a miracle recovery. All your burns have healed nicely, with no infections, and your strength has come back a lot quicker than we thought it would,” Dr. Fields says as he flips through my file. Easy for him to say, the scars don’t look like they’ve healed so nicely to me, but that’s really neither here nor there right now.
“No, I’m not. I still can't fucking get it up.”
The doctor's eyebrows rise as he looks over the top of his glasses at me. “That’s not uncommon considering all the medication you’ve been on and the trauma your body has gone through. I could give you something for now, if you like, but you're young, I’m sure it will come back to you,” he offers, but I don’t want any more meds.
I just shake my head. I’m not ready to see her yet so it doesn't matter that my cock can’t get hard right now anyway.