Beautiful Mess(133)

“I don’t believe you.” He stepped into her, his eyes boring into hers challengingly. Bri’s body trembled at his closeness, and she wanted to hit herself. This was what was best for both of them. She needed to be strong. This had to be done.

“It’s the truth,” she replied flatly, not flinching from his gaze. “I can’t do this anymore. I’m done. You and me... we just don’t work. Everything has been difficult for us. If we were meant to be, don’t you think that something about our relationship would be easy?” She shook her head. “I’m tired, Cole. I’m tired of fighting for something that I’m not even sure I want anymore.”

“You don’t mean that,” he said forcefully. “I know you don’t mean that.”

Bri took a breath, steeled her nerves, and looked right up into Cole’s stormy eyes.

“I do mean it. I’m done. It’s not worth it anymore.” Bri felt her own heart breaking as she watched Cole’s eyes shatter.

“You really don’t love me?” he pushed one last time.

“No, I don’t. I’m sorry, Cole. I never meant to lead you on, and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you. I tried to push you away before your feelings got too strong, but I failed. I’m sorry.”

Cole dropped his head. When he finally raised it again his eyes were cold, hard.

“Don’t be. At least we had some fun, right? Because that’s all this really was. One last fling before heading off to college.” He shook his head. “You’re right, this is probably for the best anyway. I mean, it’s not like you even considered asking me to go to Stanford with you or anything.”

“What?” Bri breathed, ice gripping her chest.

“Yeah, I never told you, but I actually applied to Stanford, just in case you wanted me to come with you. But, I see now how stupid that was. Obviously, I never figured into your future at all, did I?” He gave her a scathing look.

“Cole, I...”

“Save it, Bri. You’ve already said everything you needed to say. But, now it’s my turn.” He looked coldly into her eyes. “I thought we had something really special. I thought you and I could’ve taken on the world together. But, I see now that I was mistaken, in myself, and especially in you. I hope someday you meet someone who can finally break down that huge wall you have around your heart. I really thought that I could do it, but obviously I was wrong. Goodbye, Bri. I hope one day you can stop getting in the way of your own happiness.”

And with that, Cole stormed away.

She stood there frozen, too hurt and stunned to move. Bri watched him go, tears streaming silently down her face, what was left of her heart breaking, as Cole walked away from her.





Bri spent the whole weekend in bed, crying. She refused to speak to anyone, and couldn’t eat. She was surprised at how much breaking up with Cole had hurt her. She’d thought she’d be okay, or at least functional, after a day or two. But when Monday rolled around, she was still achingly devastated.

She walked around school like a ghost that week, not seeing or interacting with anyone. She knew she was the object of stares and whispers again, some mocking, some pitying, after word of Cole’s exhibit got around. But she couldn’t bring herself to care. She felt so hollow and empty inside, she couldn’t bring herself to care about much of anything.

Cole had migrated back to his old friends, including Serena who welcomed him back with open arms, both figuratively and literally. Whenever Bri saw them together, Serena always had her arm around him or was holding his hand. The satisfied, triumphant smirk on Serena’s face was like a punch in the gut. She was obviously determined to help Cole get over Bri as quickly as possible, and back into her. Bri tried to ignore the knife in her heart every time she saw them together, but the sharp pain in her chest was too persistent.

Bri’s friends were supportive and patient with her, even though she was practically comatose. She felt bad that she was basically shutting them out, but she just didn’t have the energy to pretend everything was fine. She didn’t feel like doing much besides crying and sleeping, which she did a lot of.

That Saturday was Prom. Of course she had planned to go with Cole, but that definitely wasn’t happening anymore. Despite Layla’s valiant attempts to get Bri to go to the dance anyway, Bri stayed home and spent another weekend in bed with her tears.

The next couple of weeks passed in the same dull blur. As the anger and sting of Cole’s betrayal began to fade, Bri expected that she’d start feeling better, that she’d be able to start moving past Cole and move ahead with her life. But, the absence of her anger did little to curb her misery.