Adam's List(31)
After taking a moment to summon enough courage, I clear my throat so he’ll look up.
“I know you didn’t want me to explain, but it’s something I have to do if we’re going to keep hanging out.”
He settles back in the short bench with his arm stretched over the plastic material, one eyebrow raised. “Fine. Let’s hear it.”
After a calming breath, I lay my hands down on the table as if bracing myself as the truth spills out. My eyes fall steadily on Adam’s. “I decided Levi and I don’t work together. He’s in a different place in his life. He works all the time at his motorcycle shop and hangs at the bars. He even has a two-year-old son he never sees or makes an effort to see. We really don’t even have much in common.” Other than sex. But I spare him that cruel detail. “What you saw last night was him trying to weasel his way back into my life. But I kicked him out after you left. I probably shouldn’t have hooked up with the guy in the first place. Last night you saw the real asshole side of him.”
Adam shrugs, glancing down at his menu. “He was just being protective.” He’s quiet for a moment before his attention returns to me. “Why did you hook up with a guy like that in the first place? Is he your type?”
Face flushing, I say, “I’ve been asking myself the same thing lately. I guess I was attracted to him. You know, older guy, motorcycle, the kind your parents wouldn’t necessarily approve of.” When Adam looks confused, I shrug. “I was almost always drunk whenever we got together. Before him, I only saw guys a few times before becoming bored and moving on. But then I met Levi, and thought I was ready for a grownup relationship.” I hook air quotes with the word “grownup”, feeling ridiculous for having thought such a thing.
Adam straightens with a gruff chuckle. “That guy didn’t seem like the grownup type.”
“Yeah, I’m not really sure what I was thinking and I don’t know why I let it drag on as long as it did, but that’s over now. I’m ready to start a new chapter in my life.” Our eyes catch as a look of surprise crosses his face.
“Are you ready to order?” the waitress asks, suddenly at our side. She places two glasses of water on the table before pulling a pen and pad of paper from her apron.
Adam turns to her. “I’ll take the strawberry crepe, no whipped cream.”
I’ve never had a crepe, but decide it sounds good. “What he said.”
We hand her the menus, and she’s gone again, leaving the two of us in an awkward state of silence. I shift in my seat and play with a packet of sugar. Just being in Adam’s presence lifts my spirits to a higher level than they’ve been in too long of a time. And I’m locked in a perpetual state of excitement that pinches at my chest.
“So you haven’t told me why you had to cancel on our plans last night. I figured you had probably changed your mind about me.”
When I glance up, he’s swirling the glass of water around, staring at its clear contents. “Family emergency. Nothing bad.” His eyes skate up to meet mine. “You really thought I was ditching you?”
“It was the first time you sent a text instead of calling. It wouldn’t be the first time a guy used that trick.”
Adam sighs, rubbing at the back of his neck. His eyebrows draw down in sternness.
“Jewels, please tell me you didn’t dump this guy just because of me.”
For a moment, I’m speechless, my lips flopping open soundlessly. I look back down at the sugar packet, squeezing the grain between my fingers. Swallowing with difficulty, I’m finally able to say, “I told you—”
“That you kicked him out last night after you saw me, yeah, I got that part.” He leans back into the bench. “Listen, I know it was incredibly impulsive and probably odd to ask a complete stranger to go on this trip with me. But you’re nothing like most girls I’ve met, and to be honest, I really don’t know what the hell I’d be doing if I went on my own. I like hanging out with you. It’s just...I’m probably not in the best place to start any kind of a relationship. I’m sorry, I probably should’ve made that clear right away. It wasn’t my goal to steal you away from your boyfriend.”
My face burns hot with embarrassment. I continue to focus on the sugar packet, my fingernails digging into the paper.
“Hey.” Adam reaches across the table to stop my hands from fidgeting. “Look at me.”
His eyes are soft, filled with a gleam that twists at my gut. “You’re gorgeous. I’d be an idiot not to recognize that. And I really like spending time with you. But I’m headed nowhere, fast. I dropped out of college. I live on a buddy’s couch with no long term or even immediate goals. If you think that Levi guy wasn’t good for you, I can promise you that I’m not any better.”