A Time to Heal(20)

She sighed. "But this time, this season with all the weddings . . . I don't know why, but this year it's affected me."

Phoebe's eyes were warm. "It had to happen, don't you think? You have so much love inside you, so much caring. It's only natural that you want to share that with a man and raise your own family."

Hannah laughed and shook her head. "Jenny and I talked about it once. She said I should make a list of what I wanted in a man. She called it a wish list, like I could just take it to God and ask for what I wanted. I told her that's not our way—that we feel God has someone set aside for us."

"There's nothing wrong with asking God for that man he's set aside for you, nor with telling him what you'd like in your husband. But since He knows what's best for you, He might not have the same timetable as you. And He'll surely send you someone better than you could even imagine. It's His promise to always be more than we expect, don't you think?"

"Yes," Hannah admitted. She shook her head. "He surely hasn't sent the right man yet. I don't believe anyone can say that Isaac is the right man for me."

"Nee. Even Isaac realized that." Phoebe pressed her lips together, and Hannah realized she was trying to stifle a smile.

She laughed. "Oh, Phoebe, he and I—" She paused as giggles overcame her. "We were like oil and water."

Her smile faded as she thought about how different the man she'd spent the day with was from her. And yet . . .

"What?"

"That phrase could describe the way Chris and I got along today. We're such opposites."

Shocked at what she'd just said, she blinked. "Not that I even thought about us being anything like a couple. I just showed him around. He's just here for a visit and will be gone soon."

Hannah jumped to her feet and paced the room again. When she turned, she felt disconcerted by Phoebe's expression.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I don't know who's more surprised by what just came out of your mouth—you or me," Phoebe said finally. "If he's truly so opposite, then why would you even think about him?"

"I'm not!" Hannah grew more agitated.

Phoebe patted the cushion beside her again. "Come, liebchen. Sit before you wear out the floor."

Collapsing on the sofa, Hannah let Phoebe pull her into her arms. It felt so comforting to have her hair stroked, to have someone care for her like this. She'd always been the strong one, looking out for the needs of others.

"So why are you thinking about him?" Phoebe asked after a long moment had passed.

"I'm not sure I can put it into words. There's something about him that draws me."

She raised her head and her eyes searched Phoebe's for understanding. "I sense that he's a man who cares about people.You saw what he did last night to keep Mary from being burned. What you didn't see is how he kept me from falling from the loft ladder earlier that day. He could have fallen himself."

"No, I didn't hear all the details," Phoebe said, her mouth curving into a smile. Hannah felt her cheeks grow warm. She told Phoebe the story but left out the part where her eyes had met Chris's and she'd felt a connection deep in her soul.





Chris bent to scoop up a handful of the earth at his feet.He studied its rich brown color, squeezed it to see how it held moisture, and sniffed at it.

"Taking home a souvenir?"

Turning, he looked at his host, and then he laughed, shook his head, and opened his hand, letting the soil drift to the ground.

"No, we have dirt back home. It's a little different color and smell from this. Yours seems richer."

"Crop rotation."

Matthew walked over to where Chris stood near the fence that separated the front yard from the road. He leaned his forearms on it like Chris and propped his boot on the lower rung of the fence. They studied the nearby field, efficiently harvested and ready for its winter rest.

"Had a lot of arguments with my dad about crop rotation," Chris said after a long moment. "He owned the place so he won the arguments. My brother tells me he only listened the last few years while I served overseas."

"When's the last time you saw the place?"

"I headed there as soon as I got out of the hospital. Saw the family. Hung out with some friends. Then I decided to take a little time for myself and travel."

"Jenny's sorry she couldn't show you around," Matthew said, turning to look at him.

"I should have written or called and asked, not just come and hoped to find she had the time. But I haven't had much control over my life this past year. I just wanted to move when I wanted to move."

He stopped, surprised that he'd said so much.