Surrender My Love(36)

Erin shook her head. “Dar is crazy busy these days. I’m not surprised she forgot to mention it. Let me buzz her and let her know you’re here.” She picked up the phone and called Darlene. Leesa took a few deep breaths, mentally preparing to see her old boss again. She’d been supportive of Leesa during the investigation, and when the accusation had been found to be false, Darlene had offered Leesa her old job back. Of course, strong advice came along with the offer—Don’t put yourself in any situation where you’re alone with a student again. Don’t tutor kids outside of school. But Leesa had been quick to refuse that opportunity. She’d felt like every kid would look at her differently, and she knew she’d look at them differently, despite how much she enjoyed teaching.

Funny, she’d forgotten that feeling until just now.

Darlene had been quick to find her the job at the school in Baltimore, and she’d encouraged Leesa to take it. But the uneasy feeling of being accused and of being looked at sideways lingered, whether it was all in her head or not.

Erin hung up the phone and said, “Dar said to go on back.” She stood and hugged Leesa again and said quietly, “It’s so good to see you again, and I’m happy that all that stuff didn’t take a toll on you permanently. You look amazing!”

As Leesa walked down the hall, closing in on Darlene’s office, she wondered how she was pulling off amazing when she felt like a nest of bees was swarming in her stomach.

Chris stepped out of the lounge, nearly barreling into her. “Annalise. You’re back in town?”

She was surprised at the bile rising in her throat for the man she once believed would always be there for her. Well, she was no longer the naive woman she’d once been. Holy shit. I’m not Annalise anymore.

She realized she had become someone else entirely. A woman who was pulling her shoulders back, lifting her chin up high. A woman who hadn’t fallen to ground zero after the accusations but had been strong enough to run—and sure, that might have been a weak move, but it was also a show of strength. An act of courage, just as Cole had said.

She looked Chris in his beautiful eyes, remembering how they had once affected her, seemed honest and caring. But then he’d shown his true colors, and he’d been weak. She gave a curt nod. “Chris.”

“How are you?” He raked his eyes down her body, and then his gaze darted down the hall, as if he wanted to make sure no one saw them talking. He lowered his voice and said, “We should get together and talk. Want to come over for a drink?” He stepped in closer and placed his hand on her forearm. His touch felt wrong.

She shifted out of his reach. “I really don’t have time—” That wasn’t true. She had all the time in the world. She was here to clear her name, reclaim herself, not to hide behind a thinly veiled excuse. She held her chin up high again and said, “You made your choice about me weeks ago, Chris. I don’t think we have anything to talk about.”

She turned on her heel, her chest filling with pride and a smile forming across her face as she made a beeline for Darlene’s office.





Chapter Twenty


DARLENE’S OFFICE FELT smaller than Leesa had remembered, but that might have been the suffocating feeling of being back where her nightmare began. Darlene’s lips curved in a welcoming smile, and her dark eyes warmed as she came around the desk and opened her arms to Leesa.

“Annalise, it’s so nice to see you. I was surprised to get your call. I thought you wanted to take the next few weeks to make your decision.”

“Thanks for making time for me, Dar.”

“Of course. Always.” Darlene waved to the couch beside the door. “Let’s sit.”

She had always taken her meetings with Leesa on the couch rather than sitting behind the desk, and it usually put Leesa at ease. Today it felt strange, like Darlene was trying too hard. Or, Leesa realized, like she no longer fit into the environment, despite the momentary bout of courage she’d found when she’d walked away from Chris.

“Tell me how you are. What have you been doing these last few weeks? Relaxing, I hope.” She angled her body toward Leesa, her arm outstretched along the back of the couch, the epitome of an old friend sincerely interested in hearing about Leesa’s life.

Why, then, did Leesa feel like the room held no oxygen and the walls were closing in around her? Was she just used to the openness of her job at Mr. B’s, or was this something more? Her inability to break free from her stifling past?

She couldn’t weed through her thoughts quickly enough to make heads or tails of them. Forcing her voice from her lungs, she said, “I’m still trying to decide what I want to do.”

Darlene placed her hand on Leesa’s and her gaze softened. “There’s no rush. The job in Baltimore is waiting for you. They have coverage for now. And, Annalise? Make no mistake, they want you to take it.”

Her throat felt like it was closing up.

“You were one of the best teachers we had, and all that stuff that happened is water under the bridge. No one thinks any differently about you.”

The truth spilled from her lips, unbidden. “I do.”

Darlene tilted her head in question.

“Oh, Dar. I don’t know who I am anymore, or where I belong. What happened to me did change me, whether you can see it or not. I can feel it in here.” She pressed her hand over her heart.

“I’m sure it did in some ways, but, Annalise, that was a scorned kid rebelling. You could have been anyone. You just happened to be the teacher in his line of fire. A crush gone wrong. You can’t let that take you away from everything you worked so hard to achieve.”

Leesa wanted to believe her, but her heart was racing just being back in these offices. Would it be this way in any school? Would she ever have the confidence to tutor again one-on-one, or would she always feel the need to have a witness to her actions?

The questions came in rapid-fire. Questions she hadn’t given enough weight to before this moment. She was so wrapped up in what other people thought of her that she hadn’t slowed down enough to think about what she thought of herself.

She dropped her eyes to try to gather her thoughts.

“Annalise, talk to me. Please. I know what you went through was terrible. The whole investigation, the questions...” She paused, then added in a softer tone, “Chris.”

Leesa rolled her eyes and sighed. “He’s not even a consideration. He probably did me a favor.”

“You say that now, but we all know it hurt when he broke things off. No one here was happy with him for how he handled things.” Darlene’s lips curved up in a smile. “Just think, if you take the job in Baltimore, it opens up a whole new pool of single men, too.”

She didn’t need a pool of single men. She had Cole. What she needed was a clear head, and she had absolutely no idea how to get it.

“I need a little more time to make that decision, but there was something else I wanted to talk to you about. Andy.”

“Annalise.” Darlene’s tone turned serious. “Lena told me about her concerns. We’ve discussed it.”

“Then you can understand why I want to talk to him.” She folded her hands in her lap to keep them from trembling.

Darlene’s eyes widened. “You want to…? Annalise, what are you thinking? Not only would his father not allow that, but why open that can of worms again?”

“Don’t you think that if I’m this torn up, then the kid who lied is even more so? How can he possibly move past that?”

“He can go to therapy like everyone else. He stole your life, Annalise.”

“He’s a kid. He had no idea of the ramifications making those accusations would carry. I’m sure of it.” She had to be. Otherwise, what did that say about her ability to read people, to differentiate between a malicious person and someone who’d simply made a bad decision? She’d seen malicious. Kenna kissing Cole was a malicious act to try to hurt her and win him back.

That thought made her gut ache. What would Kenna do when she found out Leesa was gone? Probably pull out all the stops to win Cole back.

She swallowed against the thought. She trusted Cole, but the thought of Kenna anywhere near him made her feel sick to her stomach.

She was getting sidetracked, and she couldn’t afford to be sidetracked. She had to take care of herself before she could offer Cole any more of herself than she already had. She had to be healed, whole, confident. She didn’t want to be a noose around his neck, a tether to a troubled past he didn’t deserve to have to deal with. She listened to Darlene tell her again that she absolutely should not go speak with Andy, and right then and there she knew she wasn’t going to heed her warning.

She needed to clear her name and find herself again more than she needed anything else.

Including Cole.





Chapter Twenty-One


“HEY, MAN, CONGRATULATIONS.” Cole pressed the cell phone to his ear as he stepped from the car in front of Tap It. He’d called Rush to thank him for referring Elsie Hood.

“Are you kidding?” Rush said. “I only refer to the best.”

“We’ll have to plan a get together soon.” Cole leaned against his car, thinking about Leesa. Rush and his siblings had all gotten engaged or married in the past few years, just as Cole’s cousins in Colorado had. Nate and Jewel were on their way to a happy future, and Cole, the one who had always been more of a one-woman man than any of them, felt like he was on the cusp of losing the only woman he wanted a future with.