Worth It All(87)

Anxious and confused, he pulled up in front of Paige’s. He’d barely stepped inside before he was assailed with Casey’s energy. She galloped over to him, all smiles and wearing her prosthesis, he was glad to see. At least he could feel good about that.

“Jake! Did you know I’m going to ride horses again? Did you know that?”

He knelt in front of her, wishing that her happiness would loosen the knots in his gut. He was doing the right thing. Repeating that fact wasn’t helping, either. “I did hear that, Pop-Tart. I would ask if you’re excited, but—”

“I am excited!”

He laughed even though it hurt. “I can tell. Where’s Mommy?”

“She’s not here. Jake?”

“What?”

With her little hand clamped down on his shoulder, her smile slipped. “I’ll miss you while I’m gone.”

His heart was crushed into a million pieces right there on the carpet stain shaped like Texas. Because unlike Casey, he knew this might very well be for much longer than ten days. “I’ll miss you too.” He pulled her into his arms and held her tight. There was a sharp buzzing in his ears and he forced himself to breathe. Casey would be fine, she’d grow and be happy. He needed her way more than she needed him.

Before he was ready, she wiggled away and galloped down the hall. He straightened, picking up the purple bear beside the couch, and faced Jenny. “I just wanted to see if she had everything she needed for the trip.”

“I think she’s all set. She just ran out to pick up her check from the diner, then she was going to do some laundry.”

“Oh. Okay.” She could have done that at his house, but she wouldn’t have asked.

Jenny looked at him with so much pity he averted his eyes. “Does she know how much you love her?”

No surprise, the truth was etched into his face. But she needed this opportunity. She needed to take it and see where it could go so she wouldn’t always wonder and second-guess herself. “I don’t want to hold her back.”

“What about holding yourself back? What if this works out and she loves it there and…” His gaze met Jenny’s and she let out a sad sigh. “You already think she will, don’t you? No, you know she will. You don’t expect her to come back.”

Jenny’s voice was pained, her eyes full of tears as she shook her head at him, baffled. “Then why are you letting her go? Am I so selfish for wanting her to stay?”

“No. You’re not selfish. You love her.”

“So do you.”

He rubbed his fingers over the bear’s cut-off leg, then looked at Jenny. “Yeah, I do.”

Paige was choosing what she thought was best for Casey, but maybe he could be what was best for both of them. He wasn’t going to stand in her way, but that didn’t mean he had to lose her. He kissed Jenny’s cheek. “Tell her I came by.”





Chapter 32


Paige led Barney, a brown and white gelding, through the barn and into his stall. She’d been here six days, and she was already in love with the horses. There was a peace here, she thought, relieving Barney of his halter and stroking his neck.

Her responsibilities were assisting Hannah with the children, bringing in the horses, and turning them out. One child, a little boy she had a particular soft spot for, had ridden twice since she’d been here. The unbidden joy and freedom when he went from wheelchair to horse brought tears to her eyes and a sense of purpose and pride unlike anything she’d ever known.

Casey couldn’t have been happier. She had friends like she’d never had before. Hannah often had her ride around the ring on Hazel when they had a new or hesitant rider. She naturally encouraged the younger children and children with more severe disabilities than she had. She also admired the kids who were better, stronger riders, two of whom had amputations almost exactly like hers.

Yes, there were places Casey could ride in California, but it would be enormously expensive. There were groups she could probably find for Casey to interact with other amputees, but not in a daily, confidence-bolstering environment like this. There was the subtlest difference in the way Casey held herself and in her smile. Pride and confidence.

But at night, when things got quiet, she would ask about Jake. What was he doing? Could she call him again? They talked every day. She smiled, thinking of all Casey told him. From the horses to the barn cat to a rock she’d found near the cabin.

When it was her turn to talk to him, she did kind of the same thing. Told him about everything from her work to her lunch. It was hard because she missed him. She wasn’t sure if it was hard for him too, but there were moments she felt like it was.