Winter Wolf(52)
“Stop being a smart ass and sit down.”
“Can I get some food?” he asked, lowering himself to the sofa so slowly Katalina couldn’t watch.
All your fault, all your fault…
She willed the voice in her head to shut up.
“I fed you an hour ago.”
“My body’s burning more fuel so I can heal faster.”
All your fault… There was that voice again, taunting her, reminding her he was injured because she couldn’t let go.
“I think we have some chips and a pizza in the freezer?”
“Your culinary skills never cease to amaze.” He flashed her a wicked smile.
Katalina stuck out her tongue and turned quickly on her heel so he wouldn’t see the smile on her face. She loved that he showed her this side. This Bass was fun, playful and a little wicked. She wondered how many people saw more than the intense, logical, Sebastian Evernight. Smiling, she opened the freezer and secretly wished that this Bass was hers alone.
Bass ate the whole pizza, bar one slice Katalina nibbled on. He was asleep minutes after finishing, the TV playing unwatched. Katalina sat on one end of the sofa with Bass’s legs across her, trapping her in. She reached for a book that had been left abandoned on the lamp table. Her mother’s bookmark still marked the place she’d read up to.
Although she didn’t read romance novels often, Katalina had to do something. The TV didn’t hold her interest and simply sitting was a dangerous thing; her mind would wander, going to the places she wasn’t ready to go. She left the bookmark on the page it had marked; the thought of losing her mother’s place made her stomach churn and twist uncomfortably. Opening the first page, Katalina left her world for a little while, knowing reality would soon come calling, once more.
*****
Katalina’s grandmother was due to arrive back in less than an hour. Katalina’s nerves were high. She felt jittery and unsafe within her own skin.
“Katalina, will you please sit. Your pacing is making me nervous and I am not the kind of person who gets nervous!”
Katalina paused to glare at Bass. He sat on the sofa chair, flicking through channels, looking bored and sexy all at the same time. He didn’t look nervous. She wondered if he ever got nervous, or feared anything.
“I can’t help it. I feel…I feel like I’m going to jump out of my skin. It’s like I can feel disaster approaching. She’s going to notice you’re hurt, and then there is Jackson. How long can I possibly forget he exists?”
Bass gave her a sad smile. Getting to his feet, he attempted to hide his pain, but she saw it; that split second where his mask slipped.
“How much pain are you really in?” she asked.
“I’m—”
She cut him off, “Do not lie to me!”
“All right, it has been a while since I have been as injured as I am, but Katalina, I really need you to stop worrying. I’m going to heal. My shoulder will be fine by the morning.”
“And your stomach?”
“Few days at most.”
“I just feel…feel so responsible.” Instantly, she felt better for sharing.
“Baby,”—he hugged her gently—“I volunteered to bring you here, remember? No one makes me do anything. This is what you needed, and I am in the business of giving you what you need.”
“What about what you need, Bass? I’ve been so selfish.”
Bass let her go and walked away. Sitting on the sofa, he couldn’t keep the grimace from his face. “Will you stop blaming yourself for everything!” he growled.
Katalina sighed. “If I don’t hate myself, who do I hate?”
“Do you know what you need, Kat? You need to be a wolf.”
“What?”
“Strip off. Summon the change. It will do you good. Your brain needs a reset; being a wolf, if only for a little while, will do that.”
“I can’t go outside. It might not be safe… Someone could see me.”
“Change in here then. Just escape that mind of yours, which seems insistent on torturing itself.”
She frowned at him, about to argue.
“For once, will you just do as I say?”
He sounded tired, exhausted from life. She hated it. Hated he’d lost the fight that she loved about him and was familiar with.
“Okay.” Katalina disappeared into her bedroom and stripped off her clothes.
Taking a deep breath, she thought of her wolf, willing her to take over. Pain snatched away all thought as her body snapped and broke, changed and mended. One minute, she was human, head full of thoughts, and the next, she was nothing but scent, sound and wolf.
She padded out on paws seeing her house through new eyes and scents; sweet and acid, sounds: the mumble of the TV, the distant call of a bird, the far off hum of traffic. She was wild and free; her mind full of simpler things, free of stress or worry, and the burden of guilt.