Weight of Silence(12)

That unexpected thought process sent signals straight to Jace’s dick, which took notice of the good-looking guy sitting so close that their arms and legs touched. Gavin wasn’t classically handsome, but his mixed heritage gave him smooth caramel-colored skin and silky black hair that Jace found incredibly appealing. He was also tall, which Jace liked, at least six-feet, and lanky.

Oh yes, he was definitely attracted to Gavin. At Thanksgiving, Gavin had most definitely seemed attracted to Jace, but what if that had changed? Maybe Gavin could tell that Jace had changed. That things were different. That Jace’s life had gone from mildly interesting to devastatingly complex with one simple choice he’d made months ago.

The past always came back to bite you in the ass.

“I killed the conversation, didn’t I?” Gavin asked.

“Maybe a little bit.”

“I don’t guess this place has a space heater?”

Jace laughed. “Sure, it’s right next to the portable air conditioning unit.”

“I knew this house came with great amenities. Does it have an in-unit washer and dryer, or do you walk to the Laundromat?”

“Would you believe my mother still does my laundry?”

“Yes.”

Gavin’s deadpan delivery of that single word made Jace crack up. It wasn’t even that funny as a joke, but he couldn’t seem to stop laughing. He didn’t want to stop laughing. He hadn’t laughed so hard in so long he’d thought that part of him was broken. He laughed himself sideways. Laughed until his stomach hurt and his cheeks were wet with tears.

When he finally sobered up and wiped his face, he found Gavin watching him with an expression stuck somewhere between amusement and lust. “Has anyone ever told you that you have the sexiest laugh ever?” Gavin asked.

Jace had lost some of his wood during the laughing fit, but his dick came right back to full attention at the heat in Gavin’s words. He didn’t care that less than fifty feet away, his parents’ house was full of friends and neighbors. He didn’t care that getting involved with Gavin would only tangle him up in Jace’s personal disaster. All he cared about was that he really, really wanted to kiss Gavin again.

“You are definitely the first to say that,” Jace said as he sat back up.

Gavin’s eyes kept shifting down, then up, then down again—right at Jace’s lips. He seemed to be waiting for Jace to make the first move, like he had the night of Casper’s party.

Oh God, that night. If only things could go back to that night when things still felt shiny and new.

Jace had enjoyed meeting Gavin’s friends, and dancing with Gavin in full view of everyone had been intense. Almost too intense, and then they’d gone out to the lake, where intensity took on a whole new meaning.

Gavin had been so charming and encouraging that it gave Jace the nerve to make the first move. To kiss him and touch him and know for sure they were both hard. To be the first to climb into the backseat. To find the skin of Gavin’s back beneath layers of clothing, warm and smooth and incredibly touchable.

Kissing Gavin had been nothing like kissing those few other guys. Gavin put passion and enthusiasm into their kisses. He made Jace feel like he mattered, that it was about more than simply getting off. And the sounds Gavin had made when Jace combined his kisses with manual explorations—God.

They kissed for a long time, and Jace’s boldness grew with every passing minute. He loved the feeling of Gavin on top of him, all warmth and muscle, pressing him into the seat with his body. Jace explored Gavin’s back and chest with his hands, but eventually that shirt had to go and he stared at the expanse of golden skin that had been hiding from him.

The dark bud of one of Gavin’s nipples was too damned tempting. Jace licked and Gavin’s entire body shuddered. He did it again and was rewarded with the same. He wanted to lick other places, to explore the rest of Gavin, but the cramped backseat limited their options. Another time, another place.

Gavin rubbed his erection against Jace’s, the friction intense and sweet even through their clothes. Jace thrust up, practically humping Gavin with his pants on, his swollen dick desperate for real friction. Real attention. He wanted Gavin’s hand on him, his mouth, anything.

Jace’s brain got stuck at the idea of making that particular move first. His earlier courage fled and he couldn’t find the guts to stray past Gavin’s belt, even though his fingers ached to explore further. He didn’t know how to tell Gavin he’d never touched another guy’s dick, never let a guy touch his, much less any of the other things he’d seen in pictures and porn.