My Wolf’s Bane(85)

He stood poised and ready bolt. At the same time, he appeared permanently stuck to the floor. Would he take his cue and be thankful I gave him a way out? Or would he stay and whisper in my ear what an idiot he’s been and tell me he can’t imagine being without me. If he walked away without a fight, then he didn’t care enough anyway. In that case, I wasn’t losing anything, right?

“Well, I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.” Zack’s gaze held mine another second or two before he turned to go.

As he left my room, my earlier inner pep talk didn’t comfort me at all. Regardless of philosophies, logic or anything else, the bottom line was that any hope I’d had that he’d come to his senses was lost. My eyes stung and my throat ached. I wanted to scream and run after Zack and tell him I loved him. Instead, I leaped off the bed, wiped my eyes and quietly closed the door.

† † †

Zack was a total gentleman, locking up the house and escorting me to the passenger side of my car, then putting the Mustang’s top up, so my hair wouldn’t get messy. But he practically went out of his way not to touch me, like when he made a wide circle as he opened the car door for me.

When we arrived at the party, he spent most of his time with Trevor, but he always positioned himself to include me in his peripheral vision. The distance between us should’ve made things easier on me, but it didn’t. I wanted him just as much as before.

I surveyed the living room of Ashley’s parents’ house, people spilling out the front door. The other day, she’d said “just some close friends” but this was a lot more than that. Yet she handled new arrivals graciously, immediately introducing them to someone, so they’d feel at ease.

Ashley’s parents were strict, inspecting the punch and other drinks to make sure no booze had been smuggled in. I thought it was pretty cool of them to allow parties at all. If anyone wanted alcohol, they could wait for Daniel to throw one.

A pale, plump gothic-dressed girl wailed away on a make-shift stage, strumming her acoustic guitar while a tall guy in skinny-pants plucked at his bass. The music was loud, but I had no problem picking up the other sounds throughout the house. Girls laughing in the hallway, glasses clinking in the kitchen.

Despite the sheer number of people, it was a good crowd. Why hadn’t I come to more of her gatherings? Now that Gina and Daniel were out of my social circle, I looked forward to spending time with people I enjoyed. Real friends who’d still be there for me, even if I wasn’t popular.

At least until I went on the lam.

Zack loitered at the other end of the room with Trevor and a couple other guys, his gaze always coming back to me.

Maya looped her arm through mine. “Love that dress. Looks like it’s been glued to you. I bet as soon as Zack saw it on you, he immediately started scheming how to get it off,” she giggled into my ear. “Where did you buy it?”

“It’s Gina’s.” I admitted, then snickered.

“No!” Maya high-fived me. “Whatever you do, don’t give it back.”

“I wasn’t planning to since she didn’t return all my stuff.” She could keep the shoes, because seeing them would remind me how she’d betrayed me with Daniel.

“It’s like there’s a blaze of passion around Zack, festering. You need to satisfy that poor guy soon.”

I burst out laughing. “Maya.”

“It’s true. God, I wished Trevor looked at me like that.”

“He does. You’re just blind to it. And anyway, I think you’re misinterpreting Zack’s expression.”

“Yeah,” she mocked. “And I’m sure I misunderstood that smoldering kiss by the curb this morning too. Gee, whatever did that mean?”

It had been foolish of me to deny it in the first place. “Okay, I get it. You’re right. He’s madly in love with me.” I snorted.

Her face lost all traces of amusement as she discreetly eyed him again. “Actually… I think he really is.”

I wanted to plug my ears. I did not need her crazy ideas banging around in my brain, giving me false hope. “It doesn’t matter. I have no plans of sleeping with him when I know he’s leaving. He’ll have to carry on unfulfilled.”

“Good girl,” Maya said, patting my arm. “Don’t settle.”

I wanted to settle though, since it was the only way I’d ever get Zack. Even as that thought formed in my head, I discarded it. If I didn’t stand my ground, I’d never truly have him in the way that mattered.

But what if Zack liked me more than he let on? His actions certainly hinted at it.