Rage and Ruin(58)
“You going to let me go now?” I demanded.
“I don’t know. Are you going to go play in traffic again?”
“Oh, yeah. It’s a favorite pastime of mine, so no promises.”
The look he gave me told me he wasn’t impressed. I drew in a shallow breath and started to try to tell him what happened, but he opened his mouth and beat me to it.
“You have so much explaining to do.” He stared down at me.
That was the wrong thing to say. “I have explaining to do? Me?”
“Are you not the person who just randomly popped up here and then ran off into the street?”
“You make it sound like I did all that on purpose, which I did not, and I also did not run off.” Even though I’d wanted to. “I walked off.”
“As if that makes a difference.” His eyes flared wide as he dipped his head. “You were out here for who knows how long, unprotected and alone.”
“Oh, like you care,” I blurted out. It was such a typical thing to say, but whatever.
“Really? You think that?”
“Based on the way you’ve been acting the last couple of days? Yeah.”
“God, I shouldn’t even be surprised that you’d think that.”
I gaped at him. “You need to chill with the attitude.”
“I need to chill?”
“Obviously. That’s what I said.” I yanked on my hand again. I was done with the hand-holding crap. I broke his hold just to remind him exactly who had the strength here. “In case you’re confused, I don’t have to tell you anything about what I’m doing, so you need to check yourself with the whole you-didn’t-know-where-I-was spiel. That is not how this works. Ever. Second, I can protect myself—”
“Except when you’re crossing streets, apparently,” he fired back.
“You know what. You can go—” I cut myself off, taking a step back.
His lips twisted into a smirk. “Finish that sentence if it’ll make you feel better.”
Instead of doing just that, I lifted my hand and flipped him off.
One eyebrow rose. “Did that make you feel better?”
“Yes.”
Lips thinning, he looked away and dragged in a deep breath. “You didn’t tell me the truth the night you were in the kitchen.”
My ears must have been deceiving me, or the Lord was testing me. Or both. “Come again?”
“That was why you had your dagger with you.” He faced me again. “You weren’t getting something to drink. Sam was there, and you didn’t tell me—”
“You didn’t tell me you were meeting up with Stacey!” I shouted loud enough that people on the street had have to heard me. “You failed to mention that when you talked about the ‘stuff’ you needed to do, so don’t stand there and lecture me. And it’s not the first time, either, right? That’s where you were the day you met me in the park. The night we—” I cut myself off. “The night Morgan was killed.”
His gaze flew to mine. “I had lunch with her that day. I didn’t tell you—”
“I don’t care.” And that was the God’s honest truth at that messy moment. “I don’t care why you didn’t.”
Zayne stepped toward me. “Are you sure about that, Trinity?”
I tensed. “I’m positive. I’m just pointing out the hypocrisy.”
“Then if that’s the case, I can’t wait to see your face the moment the hypocrisy turns right back on you.”
“Oh, you think you’re smart.” I started to turn away, but I stopped. “I didn’t tell you about Sam because I had no idea who he was that night. He disappeared before I could get a name, and I thought he was just some random spirit who’d seen me and followed me back. It’s happened before, and I didn’t bring it up because I figured hearing there was another dead person in your apartment would creep you out.”
Zayne looked toward the street, arms crossing over his chest.
“I didn’t know he was bringing me to Stacey until I saw her. If I had known who he was, I would’ve contacted you. I’m not stupid.”
His head whipped back to mine. “I didn’t say you were.”
“I guess I misinterpreted the playing-in-the-street comment then.” I held on to my anger like it was a favorite blanket. “And why are you even here right now?”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Really?” My tone was so dry, a desert would seem like a damp destination in comparison. “You have stuff to do, and the whole Sam thing seemed to hit Stacey really hard. So, you should be in there, where you’re needed. Not out here, giving me crap.”
Zayne’s nostrils flared and his pupils changed, stretching. “You’re right. I had stuff to do today, and that, back there?” He jabbed a finger at the street. “It did hit Stacey hard, because when Sam died, she didn’t even know. None of us did, because a damn Lilin had assumed his form and pretended to be him in every way possible.”
My eyes widened. A Lilin was the offspring of Lilith but nothing like Layla. A Lilin was a demonic creature way forbidden to be topside, because they could strip souls by simply brushing up against a human, creating wraiths like a mogwai feeds after midnight. And now I understood what Sam had meant by saying he hadn’t crossed over as soon as he’d died. His soul would’ve been stripped and he would’ve been...
Oh God.
“I didn’t know,” I whispered. “I don’t know anything about these people—”
“These people are my friends,” he said, and I sucked in a sharp breath. “And why would anyone tell you? You didn’t ask who Stacey lost, even though I mentioned it.”
I jerked back. “I didn’t think you’d want me to ask.”
“Yeah, and I wonder why you thought that.”
My mouth dropped open. “That’s bullshit. I tried to ask you the night we talked on the couch, and you told me there were a lot of things I didn’t know.”
“You were asking about Stacey being at my place before. You weren’t asking about her. You were asking about us. Big difference there.”
A prickly sensation swept across my skin as his pupils shrank back to their normal size. I didn’t know how to respond to that. I felt like I’d belly flopped over a line.
“I didn’t tell you about meeting with her because I didn’t think it would be something you’d want to hear. Maybe I was wrong. No. I was wrong. I should’ve said I was meeting her among the other stuff I needed to do today. Hindsight is twenty-twenty.” He glared at me. “Stacey is my friend, and I haven’t been a very good friend to her of late. That was what today was supposed to be. That’s what the other day was about. Nothing else. Nothing more. No matter what she and I used to do or not do.”
My face started to sting. “You don’t owe me an explanation—”
“Apparently I do. So, here’s what you need to know. Stacey thought she was telling the boy she knew for years that she loved him, but she wasn’t. She never got to tell Sam,” he said, causing me to flinch. “And that boy was in Hell until Layla freed him. Stacey knew that, once we realized what we were dealing with wasn’t Sam. There wasn’t a damn thing she could do, so, yes, hearing that he was there hit her hard.
“And after what happened between us, I cannot believe you’re questioning me,” he continued. “You don’t want anything serious between us, so it shouldn’t matter what the Hell I was doing with her or with anyone. You made your choice.”
“Choice?” I barked out a harsh laugh. “You have no idea, so please, keep standing there, making me feel bad when you’re the one who chose not to tell me about Stacey. And what nerve of you?” I stepped toward him. Anger and frustration was a tumultuous storm in me and the emotions got the best of me. “I had no choice. I had to draw a line, because if whatever was going on between us became more than something physical, I have no idea what would happen to you. It’s forbidden, so I drew a line at kissing, because it does make things mean more to me. You tore me down for that, making me feel like I was using you like Layla did. You projected your baggage all over me, but you brought Stacey to that ice cream parlor. I know what that place is. It’s the one your father took you to. It’s important to you, and never once have you even considered taking me there.”
“It’s a damn ice cream shop, Trinity.”
“Oh, don’t you dare try to play it off as if that place means nothing to you. If it was anyone else? Sure. I know better. You get to think I’m terrible for excluding you from something you find important, but you can do it to me?”
A muscle ticked in his jaw as he looked away.
“I guess you’re resisting saying it’s not the same?”
“Just like you not telling me about Sam is not the same?” he shot back. “Or when you refuse to tell me the truth when I know you’re not okay? Or when I know you’re not telling me the whole story about things?”
“Oh my God.” I shook my head, and I don’t know why I admitted what I did next. It was like the situation was spiraling out of control and I followed right along with it. “You know what, I have lied. That day in the park? I wasn’t out roaming around. I’d gone to see the coven of witches with Roth.”