Thoughtful(203)

Resting my head against hers, I made myself say the words I never thought I would say to her. “I’m so sorry, Kiera. I love you…but I can’t do this. I need you to move out.”

Before she could react, I stood and left the room. Any reaction from her would spark a reaction in me, and my reaction to her pain would most likely end with me staying. And I couldn’t. Not when her heart wasn’t really in it.

I made it halfway down the hall before the tears came. Near the waiting room packed with magazines and vending machines, there was a dimly lit chapel. I headed in there to find some solace so I could fall apart in peace. It was done. I’d ripped off the Band-Aid, but the wound beneath it hadn’t healed yet, and I was bleeding out. How do I go on now?

Hours later, when I came to grips with my new reality, I headed downstairs. Feeling more than a little lost, I walked the halls of the hospital. Eventually, I bumped into my band when I was coming out of the bathroom near the emergency room. Seeing them here shocked the hell out of me.

“Hey, what are you guys doing here?”

Griffin sniffed. “We came to see you and your chick. Well, your roommate chick.” Matt nodded in agreement, and I scrunched my brows as I studied them. What exactly had Evan told them? While I contemplated that, Griffin added, “You look like shit, man. How many guys jumped you?” With a smirk he leaned in and said, “It was one, right? Some tiny five-foot-nothing teenager, huh?” He shook his head with a chuckle. “Wuss.”

I looked over at Evan while Matt smacked Griffin in the chest. “They could have killed him, asswipe.”

Griffin looked affronted. “Well, they obviously didn’t. Lighten the fuck up, dude. You knew I was kidding…right, Kell?”

I managed to nod, but I was still a little dumbfounded. Evan told them the lie? Evan was remaining silent, but on his face was a knowing smile. “I…uh…Kiera’s fine, but she’s really not up for visitors…maybe tomorrow.”

I looked away as I imagined her sobbing into her pillows. Evan put his hand on my shoulder. “Why don’t we get out of here? We’ll go to Pete’s…relax.”

“I don’t want to relax,” I murmured. Looking up at him, I added, “I want to stay here.”

Griffin clapped his hands together. “Sweet! Let’s go to the cafeteria and see if we can score free food from the desperate chicks.”

Matt cocked an eyebrow at him. “Desperate chicks?”

Griffin shrugged. “You know, the fuglies with hairnets, moles, broken dreams, and crusty vaginas who work in cafeterias. It’s part of the job description.”

Matt could only shake his head at his cousin. “That’s so…How is it that no one has murdered you yet?”

Snorting in answer, Griffin started walking down the hall. “Because you can’t kill a god, dimwit.”

As the pair of them strolled away, I turned to Evan. “You didn’t tell them what happened? With me leaving…with Denny.”

Evan shrugged. “Not my story, Kellan.”

I smiled, then started following my bandmates. “Thank you. I’d rather they didn’t know.”

“Yeah, I figured as much,” Evan replied.

I thought the guys might pester me about the “mugging” once we got to the cafeteria, but Griffin was beside himself once he learned that his stereotype about cafeteria workers was dead wrong. He was in hog heaven, surrounded by cute women offering him a wide assortment of food. But, almost as if they’d heard his derogatory comment in the hallway, none of them gave him the time of day, and he had to pay for every single item he consumed. Most of the staff hit on me while we were there, which led to a different sort of pestering from Griffin, but it was a distraction I gladly accepted. And for a moment, my grief wasn’t overpowering and all-encompassing, and my “family” was the reason. I was tremendously grateful for that.

After the guys left, I went back to the quiet chapel. I ended up spending the night there, spread out on a row of chairs. It wasn’t the best place to sleep, but it was the closest to Kiera I could get without actually being in the room with her. I was stiff, sore, and tired as hell when I woke up, but I threw on a smile so I could go talk to the nurses and make sure Kiera was fine.

After one of the nurses told me Kiera was up and walking around, I wandered downstairs to watch people coming and going. Every face had a story—some happy, some sad. After a while, a face I recognized walked through the doors, and it was a face I hadn’t been expecting to see.

Standing, I called out, “Anna?”

She turned to me at hearing her name. Her eyes brightened for a second, then darkened. She scanned me from head to foot as I walked over to her. “Oh my God, Kellan…are you okay?”