Thoughtful(173)

Then I was gently pushed to my back, and Kiera explored me. She followed my cues, touching, teasing, loving me with gentle strokes. Closing my eyes, I enjoyed the sensation of her skin on mine. Nothing felt better than this. My heart and soul were connected to every move she made. And even when her tongue traveled along the deep V of my abdomen, what I felt the most was a bone-deep, life-changing love for her.

When it was clear that another teasing touch from either of us was going to drive us over the edge, I rolled her to her back and moved over the top of her. A part of me wanted to hurry up and plunge inside her, but I didn’t want to rush this either. This might be it for us; I didn’t want it to be over too quickly.

Locking eyes with Kiera, I slowly slid into her. I closed mine as the intensity washed over me. Every millimeter I moved was exquisite. I’d never felt anything so powerful, and for half a second, I worried that I wouldn’t make it long enough to please her.

I didn’t move when we were fully connected. I couldn’t. I needed a minute. Kiera’s fingers brushed my cheek, and her words breezed past my ear. “I love you.”

Opening my eyes, I gazed down at the beautiful, incredible woman beneath me. “I love you so much.”

Clenching her hand, I started to move. Bliss tore through me. “Kiera…I love you,” I whispered.

Her head dropped back as her hips met mine. “I love you…”

We kept the pace slow and unhurried; even still, I could feel the pressure building. I ignored it as best I could and allowed myself to concentrate on her face, her noises, and the feeling bursting inside my chest. The emotion of the moment was dwarfing my rising climax. I never knew love could be like this…

After a long time that felt much too short, Kiera began breathing faster and her muscles started stiffening beneath me. I knew she was close. Slightly picking up my pace, I prepared myself to let go. Let go, and love her. Her hand in mine tightened, and her lips parted as her breath increased. She was so beautiful when she came. I could see the instant she hit her peak, and I released the precarious hold on my control. The burst of euphoria shot through me a second later, and I murmured her name as I rode it out. My name left her lips, and my bliss was twofold. She loves me.

The joy subsided into peaceful happiness, and after removing myself from her, I rolled onto my back. Not wanting us to be too far apart, I pulled her into my chest. She was so warm, so soft, so…wonderful. That entire experience had opened me to something I’d never known before, and I suddenly understood what the term “making love” really meant. Sex was only a small part of sex.

Wishing this moment could last forever, and knowing that wasn’t possible, I held her close and listened to my heart slow down. When Kiera looked up at me, there were shiny tear trails down her cheeks and a sad smile on her lips. I understood her tears; I could feel my own eyes stinging in response. I want to keep this. I don’t want to let you go.

“I love you,” I whispered.

“I love you too,” she said with a kiss.

Her words made my heart sizzle with painful joy. Unbidden, thoughts of never seeing her again entered my head. Thoughts of her and Denny entered my head. Thoughts of being alone for the rest of my life entered my head. Was that my destiny? Closing my eyes, I shut out the worries I didn’t want to have right now. Kiera was in my arms, and that was all I wanted to concentrate on.

A tear leaked out when I closed my eyes though, and Kiera spotted it. “What are you thinking about?” she asked, her voice tentative.

“Nothing,” I answered, keeping my eyes closed. I wanted to block out the world. Everything but her in my arms.

Kiera didn’t buy my answer, even though I was being honest. I could feel her inspecting me more closely, so I opened my eyes. “I’m trying to not think about anything. It hurts too much when I think…”

Biting her lip and looking apologetic, Kiera repeated, “I love you.”

I nodded as my doubts became words. “Just not enough…not enough to leave him?”

Kiera closed her eyes while I cringed. Why did I say that? I didn’t mean to make this even harder on her. I just…that was the most amazing thing I’d ever experienced, and I couldn’t imagine giving it up. I couldn’t imagine giving her up. Couldn’t picture how empty my world would be once she was gone.

While Kiera looked like she was struggling to not cry, I ran a hand down her hair. “It’s okay, Kiera. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Kellan, I’m so sorry…”

I put a finger on her lips to stop her from saying what I didn’t want to hear right now. “Not today.” Smiling, I pulled her in for a kiss. “Not today…okay?”