This Man Confessed(32)
She looks at me curiously. “Sam?”
I almost slap her for her blindness. “Yes, Sam.”
“Ava.” She laughs. “Sam doesn’t think the world of me. I make the world move for him, that’s all—in the bedroom.”
“You mean you connect so well?” I raise my eyebrows at her. “Except with Sam, you also get the mental connection.”
She scowls at me. She knows I’m right. “It was just fun.”
It’s me who flops back on the couch in irritation this time. “You’re unbelievable.”
“No, I’m a realist,” she argues. “It was sex.”
“So why the hell were you blubbering like a baby?”
“I don’t know.” She stands up. “I feel like shit. It gets the emotions going. You want tea?”
“Yes,” I huff, standing to join her before following her into the kitchen.
She reaches up to the cupboard and grabs a couple of mugs. “Why are you here, anyway?”
The question makes me falter midlowering of my butt to the chair. Should I tell her? A brush-off here is not going to suffice, but she openly admits to her fondness of Jesse, and this could change her opinion dramatically. Even though I’m seething with anger at him, I hate divulging any information that’ll have my loved ones questioning him. And questioning me, for that matter. Questioning my sanity.
I decide that I do need my best friend on this. I bite the bullet. “You know my pills that mysteriously kept disappearing?”
She turns and frowns before stuffing a teabag in each of the mugs. “Yes, you and your ridiculously unorganized life.”
“Hmm, that’s what I thought.” I stare at her back, waiting for her to click, but she’s happily topping up the mugs with water, and then milk. “At first, anyway.”
She stirs the tea and brings it over to the table, plunking herself down into one of the mismatching chairs. “At first?” Her confused face tells me that she really isn’t copping on. Maybe it’s the hangover.
“Jesse has been taking them.” I blurt it out quickly, before I can change my mind.
Now her confused face is frowning heavily over the rim of her mug. “He what?”
“He’s been taking my pills. He wants me pregnant.”
Eyes wide and with a slightly gaped jaw, she puts her mug down carefully. “He told you that?”
“Yes,” I breathe. “Although I kind of already knew.”
“You knew he was taking them? When you replaced them that time and lost them again?”
“I was distracted.”
“Why the hell would he do that? And didn’t you use any protection?”
“No, not always,” I mutter indignantly, bracing myself for a lecture on carelessness. I was pretty careless, but I’m now blaming Jesse for the whole diabolical situation, not for just lifting my pills. Yes, I should’ve made him wear protection every time, but I forgot. Lame excuse, but I did, and that is because my crazy man distracts me far too well.
Kate still looks shocked. I’m not surprised; it’s shocking. “So if you knew all along, then why didn’t you take him to task on it?”
“He would never have admitted it, Kate. He’s a madcap.” I sigh. It’s probably me who’s the insane one—insane and stupid.
“But only with you,” Kate says.
“Yes, only with me.” I take a sip of my tea. She’s watching me, but not expressing her thoughts. She must have some.
“Why would you ignore it?” she asks.
I was dreading that question, but completely expecting it, and I’m wondering the same thing myself. “I have no idea.” I feel so frustrated. I have no decent excuse.
Kate shakes her head, making me feel smaller. “I don’t understand you, and I certainly don’t understand him.”
“He was scared I’d run away,” I mumble quietly. What’s my excuse for being so dim?
“You’ve married him!” She laughs. “Fuck me, Ava. What is wrong with that man? Hey, I know he’s a bit crazy but—”
“A bit?” I scoff.
“Yeah, okay, understatement of the fucking century, but his way with you has always been so endearing to me. How much he loves you, frets, and protects you. We all know his behavior is way past unreasonable, but stealing your pills? I didn’t think that man could shock me, but he’s outdone himself this time.”
“He has,” I muse, swirling my tea in slow, careful circling motions.
“So if you knew, and he knew you knew, then why the big bust up now?”
“He may have succeeded in his attempts.”