The Space Between Us(19)

"You've got to stop this. Just because I don't want to live with you  doesn't mean I don't love you or want to be with you." He looked into my  eyes like I hid the secret meaning of life in them. He searched for  something. I wasn't sure I had the answer he was looking for. "What can I  do to make you understand that I need this year? I need to live with my  best friend. I need to have this experience. We're only going to be  college freshmen once, Ash. We have this one chance. Don't ruin it by  being jealous. You've got no reason to be. Tell me, what can I do?" He  exhaled loudly again and rested his forehead against mine.                       
       
           



       

"Promise me you won't walk down the hall in a towel?" I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Will you buy me a bathrobe?" I asked, only half joking.

"I'll buy you a damn muumuu," he said, a full laugh escaping his lips. I  relaxed, knowing the argument was past us. He pressed his lips to my  forehead. "I'm sorry," he said seriously. "Everything's changing and I  just don't want us to drift apart. I am afraid you'll feel like I'm  holding you back. I'm trying to hold on to you because I'm afraid you'll  slip away." I looked up into his eyes wondering how he could doubt  anything about our relationship.

"Everything is changing, Asher. We are changing. But that doesn't mean  we can't change together. I want us to experience everything together.  And we will get our chance to live together, just not this year." I  paused, hoping that finally he was taking in what I was saying to him.

He kissed the tip of my nose and then quickly moved away again.

"Let's get your stuff unpacked and then I'll take you to the frat." And  just like that, he seemed fine again. I shook my head at him slightly,  marveling at his ability to go from angry to fine from one moment to the  next. When Reeve finally came back to the room, she had an iced coffee  in one hand and was furiously texting with the other.

"There is a coffee shop just three blocks over. And there were so many  cute boys along the way! I got three phone numbers just on the way  there." Reeve was, for lack of a better word, boy-crazy. She was  constantly dating, most of the time more than one boy at a time, and she  had no shame about it at all.

"Pace yourself, Reeve. We've been here a total of one hour. There will be plenty of time to meet guys."

"We're headed over to the house in a few minutes. Do you want to come  with us?" Asher asked her. I rolled my eyes at both of them. The last  place Reeve needed to be was a frat house.

"I have been waiting all summer to go to a frat house," she said wistfully. This time Asher rolled his eyes too.

"Well," I said, trying to sound excited. "Let's get this over with."



Asher was what you'd call a "Legacy". His father and uncle were both  members of Gamma Beta Phi, and his cousin was a current member.  Therefore, even though freshman weren't usually allowed to move into the  house until after rush, Asher was given special privileges and given a  room without question. He would eventually share it with whichever  freshman was assigned as his roommate, but for the next two weeks he got  it all to himself. Both his father and uncle made very generous annual  donations to the house, so none of the brothers batted an eyelash at us  as we walked in; he was as much a brother as any of the rest of them.

We drove by the house before, when we'd come to visit the campus during  our senior year, but I'd never been inside before. We stood in a room  that looked like it was used as a dining room. There were tables similar  to those found in our high school's cafeteria with attached benches.  The house smelled like beer. There was no other way to describe it  –   well, beer and boy. It was a distinct smell, not bad or good, but there.

Asher led us through the rest of the house pointing out different rooms,  but they all looked similar. Pretty much empty, sparse furniture, and  pretty gross. It was as if for the last ten years they hadn't really  given the place a good cleaning. There was no garbage or clutter, but no  one had taken a mop to the floors in ages, cleaned the windows, or even  thought about plugging in an air freshener. Our shoes made crackling  noises as they were ripped from the sticky floors as we walked.

"Do all the frat houses look like this?" I asked, wrinkling my nose.

"Like what?" He asked, completely unaware of the state of his new living area.

"Like a bunch of college boys live here." I answered, rolling my eyes.  "Babe, this place is gross." Asher looked completely shocked and a  little hurt.

"You don't like it? It's huge. And fratty." I could tell he was a little  upset that I wasn't in love with the house, and I felt a little bad  that I'd let my first impressions slip out to him. He didn't need me  telling him I didn't like his frat house. He looked forward to being in  this frat for as long as I had known him. I slipped my hand into his and  gave him a gentle squeeze.

"It's definitely fratty," I said with a smile. "It could just use a cleaning," I said as sweetly as I could.

"Well, I'm sure once all the rushes are picked, they will have us  scrubbing the whole house from top to bottom. That's what rush week is  all about  –  being their bitches." I nodded in understanding, trying not  to let my face show how disgusting I thought it would be to have to  clean the house. Just then a guy and a girl walked down the wide  staircase that led into the foyer. They stopped on the bottom step and  the blonde girl turned to kiss the guy on the cheek.                       
       
           



       

"I'll see you later?" She asked, her hand lingering on his chest.

"Yeah. Sure. I'll call you." He smiled at her, but even I could see his  smile was forced and fake. She smiled at him, lingering on the bottom  step, but eventually turned towards us, heading for the door. Her eyes  stopped on Asher and her smile grew even wider.

"Hello, Asher," she crooned at him.

"Hey, Tracy," he said politely. Her eyes wandered down his body as she  took him in and I found my hand sliding into his, gripping it tightly.  She winked at him and then pushed past us, leaving through the sliding  door.

"Hey, Asher. Giving the grand tour?" The guy on the stairs asked with a  smile. He was obviously older, an upperclassman. He had blonde hair that  swooped over to one side and striking blue eyes. I saw Reeve perk up at  his entrance and she adjusted her posture, pulling her shoulders back,  pushing her chest out even further. Shameless.

"Hey, Caleb. I was just showing the girls around. This is Charlie, my  girlfriend, and our friend Reeve," he said gesturing towards us. Caleb  smiled at me but his eyes moved over to Reeve with interest.

"Reeve, huh? That's an interesting name. Is it short for something?" Her eyes lit up with his attention.

"Nope. My parents were just trying to make sure I didn't have the same name as anyone else."

"Gotcha. Do you go to CU?" He leaned up against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Charlie and I are freshman this year," she said.

"Will you be rushing a house?" The side of Caleb's mouth turned up with  his question. Reeve absentmindedly started twirling a piece of hair  around her finger.

"Charlie and I are both going to rush, and just pray we get into the same house."

"Ah, I'm sure you'll be fine," he said.

I felt Asher's face come in close to mine and his breath on my ear sent shivers down my spine.

"Come on," he whispered. "I'll show you my room." He tugged on my hand  as he pulled me towards the stairs. As we walked past Caleb he gave  Asher a nod and I heard him ask Reeve if he could give her the rest of  the tour. I smirked because I couldn't decide which of them was in for  more trouble. I followed Asher up two flights of winding stairs and then  we walked down a long and narrow hallway lined with closed doors. It  looked very much like our dorm. He stopped at a room and used a key to  open the door. He swung the door open and let me enter first.

I was surprised, and relieved, that his room seemed much cleaner than  the rest of the house. It was pretty simple  –  two beds, two dressers,  one window. I could tell which side was his because I recognized the  familiar comforter on his twin-sized bed. I sat down and ran my hand  over the bedding, not expecting to feel so homesick all of a sudden. I'd  only been gone a matter of hours. Asher knelt down in front of me and  pushed my knees open so he was wedged in between my legs, his hands  spread on top of my thighs.