The Exception(106)

Cane took a step towards me. He was a mess. His clothing wrinkled, a five o’clock shadow lining the jawline that I loved to kiss. His eyes were swollen and I wondered if he had been staying up at night, too, thinking about me … about us.

“Jada, it’s over. It’s all over now.”

My head felt light, like the room was spinning, and I shuffled my way to the bed and sat on the edge. The revelation that Simon was locked away, that Cane was all right, that no one was looking for me anymore … that Cane was standing in front of me was too much.

I put my head in my hands, forcing air in my lungs.

It’s over.

My mind was racing, not quite believing the words I was hearing. This is too good to be true. I struggled for air, my lungs feeling compressed. What does this mean? Does this mean everything is okay now? Am I supposed to just go home and pretend this never happened? This is the end of Simon, maybe, but is this the beginning for Cane and I?

There was just too much to think about, too much to consider. Too many things to be thankful for and too many things to worry about.

Cane crossed the room quickly, kneeling in front of me. He kissed the top of my head, wrapping his arms around me.

The feeling of touching him calmed a part of my soul, healed a piece of my heart that had been hanging in the balance.

His touch was warm, a mixture of hard and soft that was uniquely Cane. He smelled of cedar and a hint of tobacco. It made me feel at home.

I felt pieced back together as he wrapped me in his arms. My world was righted again. That up was a viable option.

“I am so sorry.” His voice started to break. There was a vulnerability in him that I had never seen before.

I reached up and wrapped my arms around his chest. Emboldened by my action, Cane scooted me to the edge of the bed, pulling me in.

“I am so sorry,” he repeated again, his voice barely a whisper against my skin.

I ran my fingers through his hair, longer than I had remembered, not sure what to say. Everything was still in such disarray, such a convoluted mess.

I couldn’t find the words that he needed to hear and I didn’t know the truths of my feelings to share. So I said the one thing, in the midst of all the disorder in my head, that I was certain of.

“I love you,” I whispered. “I was so afraid.”

His body stilled, his warm breath halting against my neck. He pulled back slowly, looking at me with wide eyes.

“I love you, beautiful girl. Your strength amazes me. Fuck, I think you are stronger than me.”

“I don’t know about that. I just …” I tilted my head to the side, studying his face. “The only thing that I know right now is that I love you.”

He pressed his lips to mine gently, holding my face on either side with his large, calloused hands. I closed my eyes like I did the first time he kissed me and tried to commit it to memory, willing my tears to stay away.

“That’s the one thing that matters. We can figure out the rest.”

Can we? What else is there to figure out? I wasn’t even sure. I had been so focused on Cane and Simon that I hadn’t had time to sort everything else out. Ashley, him pulling away before all of this went down, the fact that he had been lying to me … My head began to pound as all of that came back.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m so glad to see you in front of me. I was so scared something was going to happen to you.”

“Hey. I’m here. I’m fine. It was you I was worried about. That’s why you had to go.” His voice was like music to my ears, music I had been dying to hear and was now being played just for me.

“I know.”

“But that’s over now. You can come back home,” he whispered, brushing a lock of hair out of my face.

I looked into his eyes, knowing exactly what I wanted to do but not at all sure what I should do. I vowed once to always listen to my brain and not my heart, but I couldn’t tell them apart from one another anymore.

Cane pressed his mouth slowly to mine, his lips soft, gentle. I closed my eyes, releasing some of the worry I had been holding inside of me at finally being able to touch him again, of knowing he was safe.

Of knowing that he came for me.

I pushed all thoughts from my brain, pressed all decisions that needed to be made to the back of my mind as I focused on the present, of Cane laying me back on the bed and covering my body with his.

His body was heavy as he pressed it on top of mine, our bodies making contact at every possible point. He laced his fingers through my hair on each side of my head, holding me firmly in place as he kissed me like his life depended on it.

Maybe it did. Maybe mine did, too.