The Arrangement Anthology 1(98)
When the door is pulled open, my heart drops into my shoes. Sean is standing there bleary-eyed. His shirt is open, revealing some nasty bruises on his skin. “Avery,” he breathes my name, surprised to see me. “What are you doing here?”
My lips part to say something, but I can’t speak. Marty walks up behind me and produces Sean’s jacket. “She wanted to bring you back your stuff. The hospital gave it to her.” I smile at Marty, grateful. I don’t know where my courage went, but it’s gone. I don’t like the look in Sean’s eye. I take Sean’s jacket and remove the envelope before handing him the beat up leather.
Sean stares at Marty with venom in his eyes, before his gaze shifts back to me. Sean takes the jacket and says, “Come in.” I nod and walk past him, into the hotel room. Marty remains in the hall way, but Sean doesn’t leave it alone. “You too, get in here.”
Marty tenses. He gives me a look that lets me know that he really can’t stand Sean. The door closes behind us and Marty crosses the room to look out a window. I know he’s trying to give me space, but Sean’s watching Marty like he’s a threat.
I step toward Sean, saying, “How are you all right? After you fell, you didn’t move. I couldn’t feel you breathing.” My eyes are as big as saucers and they start to burn. The expression Sean gives me is unreadable, cold.
“I wasn’t. The wind got knocked out of me when I fell. I couldn’t say anything. The helmet and jacket saved my skin. It’s armored. I have a gash on my leg where my jeans got shredded, but the rest of me is fine.” Sean’s lips barely move when he says fine. It’s like he’s saying that he’s anything but fine.
I nod. My pulse is pounding in my ears and my skin is prickling with sweat. I lift the letter between my fingers. Dread fills me, making it difficult to breathe. “I found this in your things.”
He stares at me. “And you read it?”
I nod. “I didn’t know what happened to you. When I saw my name on the envelope, I…” my voice trails off. What am I doing here? Sean obviously doesn’t want to see me.
“Did you give the money to Black?”
“Yeah, I did.” Sean nods slowly. His eyes keep flicking up toward the spot where Marty is standing, looking out the window. I hold up the letter again. Sean looks at the paper and then at me. “What about this?”
“What about it?” Sean holds my gaze. He almost seems defiant and I don’t understand why. After a moment, he turns away. His face pinches slightly and he has a slight limp when he steps away from me.
Anger flashes through my veins. A million thoughts collide inside my mind and explode out my mouth. “What about it? Oh, I don’t know. Was it true? Did you just write it so we’re even and you could give me back the money I threw in your face? Or was it something else?” I want to scream at him, but I don’t. Instead, I take a slow breath in and when I look up from under my brow, I catch his eyes. “Tell me the truth. How do you feel about me? Man up and say it, instead of cowering behind silence.”
Marty has turned. I can feel his eyes on my back, but he remains by the window.
Sean seems so detached, like he doesn’t care about me one way or the other. “Actions speak louder than words, don’t they? Add it up, Avery.”
I know what he’s saying. Sean is denying he has any feelings for me at all. “Bullshit. You’re a coward. Your actions ring so goddamn loud that they’re constantly gonging in my head. You threw yourself under a truck for me. Then, you ditched me. You stormed out the hospital without even checking on me!”
I shove his chest because Sean is no longer meeting my gaze. His face is turned to the side, like I’ve slapped his cheek. My heart feels hollowed out. Why won’t he tell me? Desperation fills me like a storm. It violently tears away all rational thought until I’m close to tears.
Sean runs his hand through his dark hair and looks over his shoulder at Marty. “Take her home. Play house. Do whatever it is that you two do.” Sean walks toward the door and holds it open.
My jaw drops. I glance back at Marty who is giving Sean the nastiest look I’ve ever seen. When I glance at Sean, I see it. He thinks Marty and I are an item. I step in front of Sean and tug his shirtfront hard, pulling his face closer to mine. “Marty’s a friend, you idiot, and right now he’s a better friend than you are.” I shove past Sean to walk out the door, but he catches my hand. I look back at him, ready to bite his head off, but the expression on his face stops me.
“Wait…” Sean’s voice trails off as he looks away.