The Arrangement Anthology 1(57)
Sean glances at me. “You seriously only have twenty bucks?” I nod. “And you were going to spend most of it on me, today?”
I nod again. The way he’s acting makes me nervous. I try to play it off, like it’s nothing. “It’s not rocket science, Sean. We’re hungry. We eat.”
Sean’s eyes scan my face, like he can’t believe what he sees. “You really don’t have any desire to be rich?”
“There’s a line between being piss-ass poor and having enough to get by. I want to hit the get-by line, maybe a little bit more.” I shrug and pull my knees into my chest. “More than that just fucks things up. Life isn’t about money. It’s about the people you love—the relationships you make. Maybe I have that once poor always poor thing. I don’t know, but I don’t really care, Mr. Jones. If you have a problem with it—”
Sean stares at me like I have two heads. “I don’t have a problem with it, not at all.”
I wiggle my toes in the sand and say, “Can’t buy me love.”
To my surprise, Sean says the next line of the song. I smile at him. Sean continues to recite the verse and soon his words turn to song. The velvety sound of his voice sounds perfect. Sean pulls me to his chest and sings just for me. I relax, looking out at the ocean and watch the waves. His fingers smooth my hair as his breath warms my cheek. It makes that feeling in my chest stir, the good one. For the longest time, the only thing I could feel was that hollow ache.
CHAPTER 7
Sean nuzzles his chin to the side of my face and holds me tight. I’m sitting between his legs on the sand. The way he breathes makes me feel peaceful. It’s strange. I don’t understand why or how. I don’t question things like that anymore. I just take it for what it is—I feel at ease around him. Sean rubs his hands over my arms. The chill in the air numbed my skin a while ago. It feels good to have him sitting so close, to warm me up.
I tilt my head back to ask him something, but never get the chance. When our eyes meet, something shifts. All day Sean has acted more like a friend than a lover. I’ve convinced myself it’s because that’s what he is. I’m his paid lover. It’s not the same. But that look in his eye ensnares me. It pulls me to him, making the butterflies in my stomach flutter to life.
Sean watches my lips with a hungry intensity that sends sparks through my body. Through lowered lashes, his eyes never stray from my mouth. I’m pulled to him. With everything in me, I try to resist, but I can’t. I’m barely breathing, hardly holding on. Sean gives me something to hold on to, at least for now.
The space between us closes. Sean’s lips are right there. I feel the magnetic pull and before I know it, his lips are brushing against mine. I suck in air, trying hard to control myself. I don’t want him to know how enamored I am, how much I want him. It has nothing to do with contracts or money. It’s Sean. I want him, I want to be around him and taste his lips because I want to.
The kiss is a breathtaking tease. When he pulls away, Sean’s blue eyes are blazing like twin flames. I can’t look away. I twist in his lap and turn to my side. Leaning into his chest, I lift my hand to his cheek. Leaning in slowly, watching his beautiful lips, I close the space between us. My heart pounds harder as I feel Sean’s hands in my hair. He doesn’t pull me forward, but he doesn’t push me back.
Something inside of me is screaming for me to stop. It’s the voice that tells me to hold on, that I can survive this. When every other thought falls silent, it’s always there. I don’t understand the warning bells going off. I just know how Sean makes me feel and I need to feel something that I understand right now. That night on the motorcycle, the night he helped me chase my car down, there were no voices telling me to beware. He could have ridden off with me and dumped my body at the Captree boat docks. No one would have known what happened to me. There was no little voice in the back of my head then, so it’s totally weird that it’s there now.
Breathing in deeply, I ignore the warning and press my lips to his. The uncertainty fades as Sean kisses me back. His tongue sweeps against the seam of my lips, gently, asking me if I want him. When I let him in, Sean holds me tight and leans us back into the sand. He rolls so that I’m under him. The cold air and the hot kisses crash together. My pulse pounds harder as the kiss builds hotter and hotter. Sean keeps his lips on mine the entire time, not stopping for breath. His hands touch my face, gently stroking my cheek as the kiss intensifies. My heart thuds inside of me like it’s been sleeping and suddenly startled awake. My body is hot and cold, my mind is swimming in sensations that conflict.