Taking It All(37)

True to his word, Jensen popped open a bottle of wine and poured glasses   for Kylie and Chessy and then set the bottle on the coffee table with   another unopened bottle in reach.

"Guess he expects us to imbibe a lot," Kylie said dryly.

"I'll drink enough for me and you, Joss," Chessy muttered. "Just keep pouring."

Joss reached for Chessy's free hand-the one not holding the wineglass.   "Have you thought about what you're going to do? You know you're welcome   at my house any time. You can stay as long as you want. We certainly   have the room."                       
       
           



       

"I don't know," Chessy said helplessly. "I stood in my house just   earlier and thought about how weak and dependent I've become. I have a   degree and job experience but used neither in the five years I've been   married to Tate. I have no means of supporting myself, which is so   incredibly stupid I can't even begin to go there. I have to be the   poorest example of womanhood on the planet. The thing is I'd be the   first one to advise a woman to make sure she can stand on her own two   feet and to never depend completely on a man. And yet I gave up   everything because I thought it was so sweet and romantic that Tate   wanted to take care of me. I was so caught up in the lifestyle we led   that I never considered that I'd need to be self-sufficient. Not only   does it make me hopelessly naïve, but it makes me the dumbest woman on   earth."

"Stop being so hard on yourself," Kylie said in reprimand. "We'll help   you get back on your feet. You can't expect to have all the answers in a   day. What you need to do right now is give yourself some time. Lean on   us and let us help you. Joss and I will be with you every step of the   way and we'll come up with a plan."

"Absolutely," Joss said firmly. "For the next few days all you need to   do is sit back and take stock. There is no hurry. We'll make a list of   things that need to get done. Dash knows a divorce attorney and we can   consult with him if that's still what you want to do after you've had a   few days to think on it. You don't need to make hasty, emotional   decisions. Then after you decide if you want to proceed with a divorce   we'll figure out your job options and a place to live, although you're   welcome to stay with either us or Kylie and Jensen for as long as you   want."

Kylie nodded her agreement.

"You need to be sure this is what you want," Kylie said quietly.   "Divorce is a huge step. You obviously love Tate and I am not disputing   the fact that he royally fucked up, but are you certain there can be no   reconciliation? I know he has a lot to make up for, but I also believe   he truly does love you."

"I don't doubt he loves me," Chessy said in a low voice. "But sometimes   love isn't enough, you know? His actions don't back up his words. Time   and time again he's chosen something else over me. I've done all the   giving in our marriage and he's done all the taking. I've supported him   unconditionally. I've given him my submission, my heart, my soul. What   else is there for me to give except forgiveness? I'm not sure I can  this  time."

"You make a very good point," Joss admitted. "In your shoes I honestly   can't say what I'd do. But no matter what you decide, I support you one   hundred percent and I'll always be here for whatever you need."

"The same goes for me," Kylie said resolutely. "And Jensen. Whatever you   decide, no matter whether I agree or not, we are behind you. We'll do   whatever you need us to. True friendship has no boundaries. No   parameters. And certainly has no conditions. I love you like a   sister-you are my sister in my heart-and I'll never forget how   supportive you were of me when my relationship with Jensen was just   beginning. You held my hand through it all. I'll never forget that or be   able to repay you for your love and friendship."

Chessy set her half-empty wineglass on the coffee table and then reached   for both their hands, squeezing with heartfelt love. "I love you both   so much. A woman has never had truer friends than I do."

"Soup's on," Jensen called from the doorway of the living room. "You girls ready to eat?"

Chessy didn't have the heart to tell him that the very last thing she   felt like doing was eating after the effort he'd gone to in order to   cheer her up. With a sigh, she pushed herself up from the couch and   followed Kylie and Joss to the kitchen where Dash was finishing up   setting the table.

Dash pulled a chair out for Chessy and dropped an affectionate kiss on the top of her head as she sat.

"You're going to get through this, honey," he said. "I know it doesn't   feel like it right now, but you're a beautiful, strong, loving woman.   You'll survive."

ACROSS town, Tate stared broodingly out the window of his living room,   admitting to himself that he was watching for Chessy. Hoping against   hope that she'd change her mind and come home to him.

No doubt she was at Joss's or Kylie's surrounded by the unconditional   support of them and Dash and Jensen. Jensen had been rightfully pissed   and furious with Tate. He hadn't taken it well at the time because he'd   known Jensen had been justified in his reaction. The truth was hard to   swallow. It was painful and direct. And it cut straight to his heart.                       
       
           



       

He'd failed Chessy yet again. Time after time he'd let her down. He'd   put her in serious jeopardy, her safety, her very life in danger, and   that was unforgivable. He knew it was unforgivable and yet he couldn't   face the possibility that Chessy wouldn't forgive him.

His greatest fear was that he'd pushed her too far this time. That he'd   used up his allotment of second chances. Hell, not even second chances.   More like third, fourth and fifth chances.

He rubbed his face wearily. Sleep eluded him. All he could do was sit   here, phone in hand, sending her text after text, begging her to answer   her phone. To talk to him. To come back home and give him yet another   chance.

Each text had gone unanswered. The last time he'd tried to call her it   had gone straight to voicemail, signaling that she'd turned off her   phone. The rejection cut him to the core.

Tears burned his eyelids and he rubbed impatiently at them, refusing to   give in to the overwhelming despair that crowded his heart.

He had some serious damage to repair. Starting with his career. He had   to prove to Chessy that she could count on him going forward. Whatever   it took. He'd made several calls to other financial advisors who'd   expressed an interest in partnership after his last partner had bailed.

Pride had made him refuse. He wanted to become a solid success on his   own, but now he realized that he was sacrificing what mattered to him   most with his stubbornness. He had enough clients to take on at least   two partners. With the clients they'd bring, they'd have plenty of   accounts to spread among the three of them. And he would have more time   to devote to Chessy and their marriage. Provided she gave him the   opportunity.

All he could do was set into motion the partnerships and hope for the   best. Words were useless. Until now his actions hadn't supported his   words, his promises. It was time to show Chessy instead of telling her.   He refused to give up and go quietly away, allowing her to walk out of   their relationship.

This would be the biggest fight of his life, but one he was fully ready   to wage. There would be no holding back in his bid to win Chessy back.   Her love, her faith, her trust. He wanted it all. And in return he'd   give her his all.





TWENTY-THREE


THE next few weeks were a test of endurance for Chessy. She was   surrounded by Kylie and Joss as well as Jensen and Dash and their   unfailing support, and God knew she needed it because Tate was   persistent in his campaign to win her back.

Flowers arrived daily. Chessy had gotten on a first-name basis with the   florist who delivered each bouquet. Equally prevalent were gifts.   Earrings-she was admittedly an earring whore-a delicate necklace, and   handwritten notes, each recalling a memory in their marriage.

She was at her breaking point emotionally. Tate had, for all practical   purposes, declared emotional war. Everything he did pulled relentlessly   at her heartstrings. Made her remember much happier times. If only he'd   exerted half as much effort before as he was now they wouldn't be  living  apart in separate beds.